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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU in thinking a drunken 18 year old boy should not be called to account for behaviour 35 years later?

436 replies

longwayoff · 28/09/2018 16:43

I'm conflicted. Brett Kavanaugh, nominated by Trump as a Supreme Court judge, has been accused of locking Dr Christine Blasey Ford in a bedroom and sexually assaulting her. This happened in the early 1980s when they were teens at a party and he was very drunk, she hadnt been drinking. She says she is 100 percent certain he did this. He says wasn't me guv.
Her televised evidence was upsetting and convincing. I believe what she says and feel she should have whatever she needs to help her. BUT. Drunken 18 year old boy/man. All these years later? Is that fair? To wreck his career now? Personally, I loathe Trump and all his works, so politically I'm glad to see a fail. But this is not sitting well with me. I feel I should feel better about this. Convince me please.

OP posts:
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grumiosmum · 28/09/2018 18:52

RedneckStumpy Living up to your name? Are you a Trump supporter too?

It's not trying to "screw up his career' it's trying to protect women in America from the lifetime appointment of the most senior legal position in the country which will affect how women are treated in law for generations to come.

RedneckStumpy · 28/09/2018 18:52

But coming out with claims now weakened her story by giving the Democratics anti Trump ammo. It gives a reason to call her story into question.

I am not a Trump fan (Hillary is worse) but it just seems claiming this not is guaranteed to make her look bad

AngelsSins · 28/09/2018 18:52

If it came to light that at 18, he’d locked a dog in a room and beat it to death, would you still feel like he was being hard done by and should still get this job?

It seems to me people have more empathy for dogs than women.

RedPanda2 · 28/09/2018 18:52

I'm really pleased about the replies on here, I couldn't help myself but look. This has been very triggering for survivors and the comments on some social media posts are sickening. Yes he should be held accountable and so should all sexual predators. Unfotunately they are not. If you have the strength to go to the police ( I didn't) you can be put through the wringer and they get away with it anyway.

RedneckStumpy · 28/09/2018 18:53

grumiosmum

No not a Trump supporter I would class myself as Libertarian.

grumiosmum · 28/09/2018 18:54

surferjet you could start by allowing the FBI to investigate.

Kavanagh's friend was allegedly a witness & refused to testify yesterday.

There will be evidence from people who may have been at the party & remember the 2 of them being completely inebriated.

There is already diary evidence which is being looked at. It's hard to prove, but not impossible to get a balance of probability.

AuldAlliance · 28/09/2018 18:54

His career won't be screwed. He just won't be a Supreme Court judge. Which is hardly a commonplace career development. Whatever happens, he'll be fine, because of who he is and what his background and support network is. He may not coach his daughter's team much longer, but there is no question of his being sacked from his current post, merely of his not gaining extraordinary power of the lives of all US citizens.

Dr Ford, on the other hand, has received death threats and had to leave her home. She was already not fine, although she had tried to bury past events. Whatever happens, she won't be fine.

LittleMy77 · 28/09/2018 18:55

There's two more women come forward with similar stories of different experiences with him, both of which are credible.

They're not calling them to testify, neither are they calling Mark Judge (Kavanaugh's friend who was there when Ford was attacked) this is a complete farce as a result, and they'll jam in the vote before this or an FBI investigation happens

grumiosmum · 28/09/2018 18:56

Ah. A libertarian. I know a few of those. Most are even more right wing than Trump.

FreshairFriday · 28/09/2018 18:56

OP, as someone in this exact situation myself, you are wrong.

AnnieHawk · 28/09/2018 18:58

Something that often strikes me at times like this - if you've been the victim of a crime you usually want to see someone punished for that crime. But the person you want to see punished is, unless you're completely mad, the person who committed the crime, not some random other.
And ask yourself this - what does this woman have to gain by holding herself up to public scrutiny like this if Kavanaugh isn't the person who attacked her?

BlackBeltInChildWrangling · 28/09/2018 18:59

RedPanda2 Flowers

Quartz2208 · 28/09/2018 19:00

He looks like a man who thought he was untouchable and could do what he wanted regardless of anyone elses viewpoint. And now he has been found out but he still believes he has done nothing wrong - that is why you are questioning it because it looks like he honestly does not understand what the fuss it all about and that he has done nothing wrong.

And that is the frightening undertone in society at the moment that he (and others who are supporting him) genuinely believe that

RedneckStumpy · 28/09/2018 19:00

grumiosmum

Hmm interesting how so?

grumiosmum · 28/09/2018 19:01

Well he's been approved now.

FFS.

pumkinspicetime · 28/09/2018 19:01

The Dr gave the information to the senators because it was relevant to them in their decision making stumpy she had discussed it years ago with her husband and therapist.
She asked not to be identified and I agree that the leaking of her name was a political act by the democrats. But the politicising of her story by others after she has come forward with it doesn't mean the story is untrue or that it wasn't known about by others years ago.

Tistheseason17 · 28/09/2018 19:03

I knew a lot of drunk 18 years who did not try and rape me.
You don't "become" someone who attempts rape after alcohol.
It's about power and I'd be more worried about his actions whilst sober.

BlackBeltInChildWrangling · 28/09/2018 19:03

FreshairFriday and all others in a similar situation Flowers

BigChocFrenzy · 28/09/2018 19:05

It's just the Committee vote, not yet the final confirmation

The voters can punish the Republicans at the polls
BUT the problem is that if he is appointed, he can stay on the Supreme Court until he dies, helping to roll back decades of liberal legislation and blocking new legislation

ForalltheSaints · 28/09/2018 19:09

I am a man.

He should be facing a court of law, and any decision on whether he can be a Supreme Court judge put on hold.

bakingdemon · 28/09/2018 19:12

Whatever he did when he was a teenager, his disgraceful performance in front of the Senate committee yesterday should be enough to disqualify him from taking a position on the Supreme Court. Totally beneath the dignity of the office.

BigChocFrenzy · 28/09/2018 19:14

Interesting that Kavanaugh was on the staff of Ken Starr, the man who investigated Bill Clinton’s sexual scandals in excruciating and public detail,
the stupid but consensual relationship with Monica Lewinsky

Massive double standards:
a rapist should be excused and receive sympathy - if a Republican
but an adulterer should be crucified and impeached - if a Democrat

MagentaRocks · 28/09/2018 19:17

I would agree with you op if it was a different minor offence like getting drunk and smashing a window or something and if it was a one off.

An offence like this is totally different. Sexually assaulting someone isn’t a stupid schoolboy prank. This type of crime has far reaching consequences for the victim so why shouldn’t the offender have to deal with far reaching consequences?

pumkinspicetime · 28/09/2018 19:18

My DH agrees with Forallthesaints
There are plenty of men who have no time for this behaviour, DH believes that it will just die out. I am less hopeful.