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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU in thinking a drunken 18 year old boy should not be called to account for behaviour 35 years later?

436 replies

longwayoff · 28/09/2018 16:43

I'm conflicted. Brett Kavanaugh, nominated by Trump as a Supreme Court judge, has been accused of locking Dr Christine Blasey Ford in a bedroom and sexually assaulting her. This happened in the early 1980s when they were teens at a party and he was very drunk, she hadnt been drinking. She says she is 100 percent certain he did this. He says wasn't me guv.
Her televised evidence was upsetting and convincing. I believe what she says and feel she should have whatever she needs to help her. BUT. Drunken 18 year old boy/man. All these years later? Is that fair? To wreck his career now? Personally, I loathe Trump and all his works, so politically I'm glad to see a fail. But this is not sitting well with me. I feel I should feel better about this. Convince me please.

OP posts:
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8
AuntBeastie · 28/09/2018 17:32

Being successful in your career doesn’t absolve your previous actions, especially if those previous actions involved attempted rape.

Who cares if he worked hard? Who cares if he is good at his job? Who cares if he is successful or talented or clever? None of that changes the fact that he tried to rape someone.

He has shown himself to be manifestly unfit for this role. No man who tries to rape is fit to sit in judgment of others.

He was lucky to get away with things for as long as he did. I am not sympathetic that his luck has finally been brought to an end by a courageous woman doing her civic duty.

Singingtherapy · 28/09/2018 17:32

YANBU OP.

Tinkobell · 28/09/2018 17:33

No YABU. IF the allegations are true, he's a nasty bastard who deserves to be outed for the sexual thug he is underneath the veneer. The only reason she's come forward years later is because she sees him on the brink of stepping into a position of public high office - a role which requires a person of exemplary standards and values. She's right to have outed him and he's a horrible violent shit.....if it's true, and only those two people know that.

ConciseandNice · 28/09/2018 17:33

WTAF.

Juells · 28/09/2018 17:35

You can't start shouting about it the better part of 30 years down the line...

You can and should if the person in question is known to have strong views on abortion and is going to be in a position to influence legislation on the subject.

I found it interesting when a man phoned in and waffled about how there should be a statute of limitations, but then started naming the exceptions he approved of - hunting down Nazi criminals after the war, paedophile priests, etc. - all things where men would have been some of the victims as well as women or girls. It's only women who shouldn't be allowed talk about their trauma. He felt her whole life should be examined as well to see if she had any connection to the Democrats - as if anyone would destroy their family's life like that just for politics.

ErrolTheDragon · 28/09/2018 17:36

Sure, he shouldn't be called to account 35 years later, would have been much better if it could have been done at the time. But better late than never.

bunintheoven88 · 28/09/2018 17:38

I found it disgusting how he brought his ten year old daughter into it, apparently she told him they should 'pray for the lady' as in Dr Christine Blasey Ford.

Just wow.

MrsJayy · 28/09/2018 17:39

Bill cosby was finally jailed this week for crimes going back 50 odd years there should be no ammount ofyears these men should be absolved

JuneFromBethesda · 28/09/2018 17:41

You can't start shouting about it the better part of 30 years down the line...

You know what, you fucking can. If it takes a woman 30 years to find the courage to speak publicly about being sexually assaulted when she was 15 years old, she absolutely can start shouting about it, and she should be listened to.

pointythings · 28/09/2018 17:43

The majority of 18 year olds do not run around trying to rape people when they are drunk. Multiple women have now come out making allegations against this man. At the very least he should not be appointed until there has been a thorough investigation. The actions we take say something about who we are, and we are responsible for them - forever.

If Brett Kavanaugh is appointed, I hope Trump takes a hammering in the mid terms as moderate Republican women desert him. I would not want this man to make social policy for the next 30-40 years.

JuneFromBethesda · 28/09/2018 17:44

Are you convinced yet OP?

MinaPaws · 28/09/2018 17:45

While it's kind and right to allow people to move on from past mistakes, a couple of things to think about here:
The role is as Supreme Court Judge. You need to be of impeccable character. Not all young men sexually assault young women when they are drunk, prevent them escaping and smother their mouths when they try to escape. That's indicative of a less than impeccable character.

If it turns out he did it and we all agree he should be forgiven and allowed to be Supreme Court Judge anyway, how do we forgive him lying about it? Do we want a self-serving liar as Supreme Court Judge?

TheFaerieQueene · 28/09/2018 17:46

I have no words OP. No words at all.

TheHeartOfTafiti · 28/09/2018 17:47

8 year olds are boys, at 18 you’re a man and more than old enough to understand that assaulting people is wrong. I have known lots of 18 year old men in the course of my life and, to my knowledge, none of them went round assaulting women - age is no excuse.

Thebluedog · 28/09/2018 17:48

Hasn’t he stated that he wasn’t even at the party (ok I know this misses the point if the thread)

I don’t think there ever should be a time limit on sexual assault, however she will be questioned as to why she took this long to mention it. Plus she’s also a member of the opposition party (and they are very much trying to use this against trump) which will have some people questioning if this is a political move over and above anything else.

DarlingNikita · 28/09/2018 17:48

I found it disgusting how he brought his ten year old daughter into it, apparently she told him they should 'pray for the lady' as in Dr Christine Blasey Ford.

That made me feel physically ill too.

Missingstreetlife · 28/09/2018 17:48

Sally/Gordon. Have you seen what she said? Not some quick fumble, two boys locked her in a room and assaulted her, nasty stuff

Mrsmadevans · 28/09/2018 17:49

He should be called to account most definitely, he is still the same person . I totally believed her too and didn't believe him at all.

bellinisurge · 28/09/2018 17:50

If an 18 year old sexually assaults someone, damn right. Drunken 18 year old boys don't routinely sexually assault people.

NameChangeMagee · 28/09/2018 17:50

Biscuit Ruin his career? He'll still be a judge in the second highest court of the USA if not confirmed to the Supreme Court.

Some of what he's accused of has no statute of limitation in Maryland - this will get investigated. It won't remain a he said, she said forever. Men will talk about what happened when they were teens because they won't want to be tarred with the same brush.

Want2bSupermum · 28/09/2018 17:50

The issue I have is that he has been a judge already for years. If he did rape her he should never have been a judge in the first place and I'm surprised it's taken her this long to come forward.

The other two women should have been heard too. I fully believe Dr Ford BUT what was presented was hear say. This is the major problem with rape. It's why every single case has to be taken extremely seriously.

The reason for my saying the legal fees should be paid for by the taxpayer is because so many people are saying it's biased. It's clear she was violated, it's just not clear it was him. Even if working pro bono, there is an independence issue IMO regarding the lawyers. Let the taxpayer pay the bill and remove the independence issue.

Andro · 28/09/2018 17:51

Some on here have mentioned his views on abortion as a reason to support the alleged victim speaking out; rightly or wrongly Dr Ford's actions now will be viewed as being at best politically motivated, at worst they will be viewed (by some) as a vindictive attempt to damage a man for his conservative outlook.

I doubt an investigation will happen, but even if it does I believe the statute of limitations has long since passed.

chicken2015 · 28/09/2018 17:52

The more i think of this isnt it saying something about our society that this post was even asked? To be fair we do have the american president who has been accused of sexual assault by over 10 women and hes on tape bragging about sexually assaulting women, so surely sexual assault doesnt seem that high up on the list of things people shouldn't do, what a f*ed up world we live in! Dont normally swear but cant really think of a word more appropriate.

Andro · 28/09/2018 17:53

Some of what he's accused of has no statute of limitation in Maryland

Did this happen in Maryland? I'd got it into my head that it was DC?

BakedBeans47 · 28/09/2018 17:53

YABU

if he was applying for a normal job then I might feel differently but this is a hugely important judicial and political appointment