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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

MIL has stolen my shoes!

469 replies

ratherbeshowjumping · 26/09/2018 11:43

This is not a joke...!

Historically I've had a very difficult relationship with Satan my MIL. DH pops his head in once a week on his way home from work but we otherwise have little to do with the witch. We get on OK when we do see her.

Last week I had to work away and she did massively help us out by popping in and checking on the puppy.... and since then I cannot find my very, very naice pair of wellies that my lovely DM treated me to.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, DH went in to say hi yesterday eve and my wellies were there, neat by my backdoor. He immediately said "are they showjumpers wellies?", she laughed and said "no, of course they're not." DH then said "oh showjumper has lost hers, exactly the same."
She then laughed and commented how absentminded I am!!

(I am but that's not the point!)

With risk of sounding awful, I do not think she would be familiar with the brand and even if she was, she would have the money to spend £300+ on a pair of wellies.

WWYD? All suggestions appreciated Grin

OP posts:
Cindersdonegood · 27/09/2018 22:35

Given the number of people aghast that boots can cost £300, the likelihood of two households (one being of the non-outdoorsy type too so would have, like most here, no concept of £300 boots) both having the exact same pair of footwear is more than enough "evidence" that MIL is a thieving bitch.

TemptressofWaikiki · 27/09/2018 22:45

Strongmummy 1) you’re asking us to take you at your word your Mil is a bitch when there’s no evidence 2) you sound like you’ve got too much time on your hAnds

Are you on glue...?

Strongmummy · 27/09/2018 22:49

@temptress my drug of choice was never glue, no. Unless more has been revealed in the thread, which I can’t be arsed to read, there is quite literally nothing in the OP the suggests that mil is a bitch other than the OP saying she’s a bitch

Strongmummy · 27/09/2018 22:52

Apparently if I’d read the thread it’s all worked out for the best . Yawn

welshmist · 27/09/2018 22:53

Some MIL`s really do take the biscuit. Glad you and OH can handle it with some humour.

StartingGrid · 27/09/2018 22:53

15 pages in and people are still going on about the cost of the wellies?! Talk about missing the point!

jadfiewahnds · 27/09/2018 23:17

Strongmummy why so aggressive?

SeaToSki · 27/09/2018 23:20

When you give your MIL her bright yellow boots with bells on for Christmas, can you tell her they are a fancy new brand called Voleur. Infact maybe write it on the backs of them in a trendy font with indelible pen

jadfiewahnds · 27/09/2018 23:22

This thread is insane! Why are people so riled about the cost of the boots? It's like arguing with somebody who drives an Aston Martin because a Ford Fiesta is cheaper. Or somebody who owns a 4 bed detached in the South East when a terraced in Newcastle costs a fraction of the price
Bonkers!
Glad you got your boots back OP

jadfiewahnds · 27/09/2018 23:26

Also posters reading only the OP of a 300+ post thread then getting pissed off at people pointing out that their posts are ridiculously irrelevant. Because rtft is boring?!
Cancel the fucking check already

jadfiewahnds · 27/09/2018 23:27

Fuck, cheque obviously

Skittlesandbeer · 27/09/2018 23:28

My local supermarket can offer OP the perfect MIL Xmas present:

Black wellies with white pirate motifs...

And DH can buy her the matching umbrella (for the inevitable Xmas shit-storm, doncha know).

Sparklyfee · 27/09/2018 23:28

What's wrong with bright yellow wellies?

puzzledlady · 28/09/2018 00:41

Some people totally missing the point of the thread - the issue isn't the cost of the damn wellies - OP can afford them, so what? I have boots that cost higher, proper walking boots and they are a lifesaver when i do longer walks with the children and the dogs.

OP glad you got your boots back.

Furries · 28/09/2018 00:49

Glad you got them back, she sounds like a nightmare!

Can’t get over the continuous “shock” about the price of the boots. For the OP’s job, do people expect her to spend all day, every day in cheap boots whilst tramping around wet, muddy, shitty fields? Dread to think what state her feet would be in after a week of that.

Would you berate a gardener for buying a professional mower for his business rather than something cheap from a diy store. Would you expect a driving instructor to buy a crappy runaround rather than a vehicle that’s fit-for-purpose? The cost is relative to the situation the item is used for/how long it will last/etc etc.

MrsCrabbyTree · 28/09/2018 01:18

I would have preferred stealing shoes to be an early sign of my mum's impending dementia …. Mum went straight to writing "bitch" in permanent marker on her neighbour's car! Neighbour was not a bitch in any way or form.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 28/09/2018 07:53

a fancy new brand called Voleur.

Sweet! Grin

SchadenfreudePersonified · 28/09/2018 07:55

What's wrong with bright yellow wellies?

Nothing Sparkly - but they are quite distinctive and unlikely to be "accidentally" taken home by accident in an accidental way.

LucyMorningStar · 28/09/2018 08:03

Oh FFS it's the new 'cancel the cheque' Grin

Well done on getting them back OP!

NewPapaGuinea · 28/09/2018 08:21

My motto is practically “cost per wear”. My wife eye rolls everytime I say it lol. I don’t buy clothes and shoes that often, but when I do I pick more expensive items that will last me years. If they get damaged I’m more inclined to get them repaired because they’ve become somewhat sentimental and they’ll cost more to replace.

I’ve bought cheap clothes, that go out of shape after one wash or they’re just not tailored well. False economy in that regards if you end up wearing them only a few times.

Original poster
ratherbeshowjumping · 28/09/2018 08:24

Wow, I taught a pole work clinic yesterday evening until late & am just catching up through....

@Strongmummy sorry if I did make it clear enough in my OP, throughout the thread I have given examples of the nasty stuff she has got up to.
Making me cry (not with tears of joy!) on my wedding day was another...
Perhaps it's my inexperience on MN but I genuinely didn't think that I needed to list everything she'd ever done to me on my OP. I'm sorry if this confused you. I have virtually no contact with her.

@m00rfarm - DH suggested that he brings up in conversation with her that I'd like those boots for Xmas 😂 (I would actually love those boots) - how far up your calf do they go?

@Feefeetrixabelle I might send her that as a "thank you for stealing my boots" present 🤣

@Skittlesandbeer & @SnipSnipMisterBurgess I love the idea of getting her something like that!!!

To everyone asking - I did post a link to my Ariat boots that I'd recommend, they are/were probably the warmest, most comfortable boots & have lasted for 3.5 years. I think they've got another winter left in them (but I'll probs be wearing my chams 😝😝😝). I did have a pair of Dubarry River Boots a few years back but they didn't last long at all, the leather did crack across the toe & also they kept falling down my leg.

In hindsight I should have just written "equestrian boots" 🙈 the posts about the cost is getting a bit ridiculous - @jadfiewahnds & @Furries points about cost being relative to the job is spot on. Also, if I'd had written this post about Louboutins for example, I'm sure no one would have raised an eyebrow.

OP posts:
Louloup20 · 28/09/2018 08:25

Love this thread, made me laugh so much mainly because I can totally relate. My MIL is the queen of passive aggressiveness. Add controlling and an unbelievable sulk and you have her described perfectly.

I posted a thread a little while ago about my MIL sharing photos of my DD with all of my husbands EXs (who she talks about having lunch and dinner with regularly to my face). This was just one of the many things she does to try and get me to react. I am more the kind of person who just gets embarrassed, goes red and then cries in the bathroom for 2 minutes and I drop it.

I got so much abuse on MN for not respecting my DH mother and not having the guts to stand up to her...not sure how I can respect her then stand up to her but I just took on the nice supporting comments offering advise and forgot about the trolls.

Since then she has told me that my newly decorated house matched my garish personality, told my husband in front of me that she always thought he would marry his EX. Told my DH when they were alone that my DD looks too white (husband is black, I am white - DD is obviously mixed race). Asked if he had thought about a paternity test??? WTAF???

These are just some of the things she pulls and I never react, I allow her in my home, I make her feel at home, I am hospitable and personable with her. DH will pull her up on her crap but when he does she just blames me so I can never win.

I am glad you got your wellies back...and so what if they cost £300...people will spend £100s a month on going out, smoking and drinking and not even bat an eyelid.

Original poster
ratherbeshowjumping · 28/09/2018 08:26

And to everyone who's asked, yesterday was my only my third full day working wearing them but so far so good. They are really comfy and so warm. I have an awful back & they offer great support.

I'm unsure about riding in them, hacking perhaps would be fine, but I usually ride in proper boots anyway.... I'm not even going to post about the cost of those 🙈

OP posts:
Original poster
ratherbeshowjumping · 28/09/2018 08:34

@Louloup20 she sounds like a Satan too!!! What a swine.
I think it's ridiculous to get abuse when you're posting for advice or because you're upset - I hope you're ok Flowers great point re going out, drinking, smoking. I know for sure my sister could easily spend £300 on a night in town!

OP posts:
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