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Dad at nursary pick up/drop off

83 replies

Flowersandblack · 25/09/2018 21:52

Okay I don't want to sound like a dick but my dd started nursary at the beginning of the month. Hours at 12-3 monday-friday.

Another child started at the same time cute little kid but my god is her dad a entitled prick.

Every day when we get to the gate for pick up we are supposed to wait until a memeber of staff comes to open the gate or press the intercom to release the gate. I usually like to arrive 5 mins early to avoid the queue to collect dd and parking can be bad in the area.

Everyday no matter what time this dad gets there it could be 10 mins before or 2 mins before 3 he presses the button for attention and demands he collects his child there and then. If he is 2 mins before 3 this holds the rest of the children up being released as they have to get his child ready first and then he wants to stand in there and chat to the staff about his child's day so it's not even like he is in a rush so has to collect early he just does it.

On the drop off he pushes past parents who are their to collect their children from the morning session and yesterday he pushed passed me and demanded they do his other child's settling in session there and then despite it being schedualed in for 2pm (it was 12 o'clock a huge change over with children coming and going the staff were just sorting all these other children out) they tried to tell him no it had to be at 2 as all staff were busy with the other children and his child would need special attention they wouldn't be able to give until 2 once all the other children were settled for the afternoon he kept cutting them off saying no I think its fine to do it now.

I didn't see the outcome of what happened as another memeber of staff came and took my dd and said goodbye to me but aibu to be so sick of this shit already he's just a wanker refuses to wait with everyone else and definately won't stand in line for anything. I am 21 weeks pregnant so could be hormones but he really gives me the rage and I feel like I'm not far off saying something. I do think the nursary need to toughen up aswell though and tell him nursary finishes when it finishes and he is holding up all the other children and parents by expecting this special treatment every day.

OP posts:

AdamHi · 25/09/2018 23:42

I should tell the nursery staff about it. How do the other parents feel? The chap needs a decent talking to. He sounds like a bit of a bully.


Flowersandblack · 25/09/2018 23:44

Adam I often hear other parents complaining about him. My dad had to do pick up on Friday as I had my 20 week scan even he commented it when I went to collect dd from his house. The words he used were colourful! Grin

OP posts:

LimitIsUp · 25/09/2018 23:45

I wouldn't let her off so lightly Flowers, but then my dd is dyslexic so I find idiots who criticise SPAG quite triggering


MissGiddyPants · 25/09/2018 23:50



TuathaDeDanann · 26/09/2018 00:01

I'd ask the staff with a poker face ''how much extra is it to have your child ready and passed out to you first?''


TawnyTeal · 26/09/2018 00:43

You could always mention it to the staff in terms of you are worried about having to wait the extra time he causes when you are heavily pregnant/have a newborn...... Gives them the opportunity and a bit of time to “manage” him into the correct procedure.


Jux · 26/09/2018 02:41

Maybe your dad could pick dd up for you again. Only this time he could firmly engage EntitledTwat in manly talk (undoubtedly the only sort of talk ET indulges in) until either it's time and he has to wait his turn like everyone else or your dad points out how utterly churlish he is for not respecting the ladeez and gives him a few manly pointers as to how he should behave if he wants people's respect.


TheMaddHugger · 26/09/2018 02:55

Another Dyslexic here. The spellchecker soes not pick up everything.
((((Hugs)))) OP.
And Yes, there is one in every playground.


TheMaddHugger · 26/09/2018 02:56

soes = does



TheMaddHugger · 26/09/2018 03:00

I used to work in a kindy. It's up to the Manager to deal with this.

Or not as in the case with ours. she was totally Non confrontencable One of the other fatehrs ended up getting into it with said Bully and yeah. It wasnt pretty

OK, Spellcheck Is NOT working at all today.


user1457017537 · 26/09/2018 03:59

Just ask who you have to sleep with to get preferential treatment like entitled twat dad


Sashkin · 26/09/2018 04:33

Looking on the bright side, bitching about what a knob this guy is will give you something to bond over with the other parents.

(And yes he does sound like a total knob)


Hanyu · 26/09/2018 05:01

I’d talk to the staff, but I don’t see why the OP can’t say anything when he pushes in front of her. I’d definitely tell him that you were there first and to get in line.


LimitIsUp · 26/09/2018 08:00

You shouldn't have to worry about spellchecker TheMaddhugger - your post is perfectly easy to understand as it is


QueenArseClangers · 26/09/2018 08:37

I’d bloody say something to him.

“Excuse me, can’t you see we’re all waiting for the staff to get our children? Is there an emergency?”

If he says yes to the emergency then when he’s mithering the staff then I’d do a big not so subtle hinting cough and say ‘thought there was an emergency that you had to get to?’

Fucking dickhead. His behaviour is having an affect on you and other parents Angry


Laureline · 26/09/2018 09:18

Tell the staff that unless they sort it out and properly manage this, you will be doing the same as the entitled twat and ask for your child first? They are effectively saying this is acceptable.


Flowersandblack · 26/09/2018 09:29

I think its more of a case of not wanting to get into it while there are children around. I think its also because nobody else has said anything I'm sort of wondering whether I should as compared to most parents there I am new.

OP posts:

ProfessorMoody · 26/09/2018 09:33

The manager needs to deal with this - he's clearly an idiot.

I had a father exactly the same in my Reception class. He'd turn up to collect his child 45 minutes early EVERY day. He'd stand with his face pressed up against the glass of the locked external door, quite literally until the bell went. He was trying to catch a glimpse of his PFB moving between class, hall and cloakroom to collect his things. If the door was ever unlocked for another class' PE lesson or trip, he'd come INTO the school and stand directly outside my classroom door, which was intimidating for the children and fucking annoying for me. He'd attempt to get into my classroom and would start trying to find the child's waterbottle, book bag and other possessions while I was still teaching. It was unbelievable.

He was told by me, the head and the other parents to stop, but he wouldn't listen to anyone. We sent letters warning of legal action because of the implications of having someone with no CRB on school property. He didn't listen. We were in the process of arranging a meeting about him with the board, when my TA had enough and shouted at him for about twenty minutes Grin It was more than her job was worth, but I think the head was so glad it stopped him, she really didn't care.

He didn't come in again unless invited, but he still arrived 45 mins early each day.


ProfessorMoody · 26/09/2018 09:34

Sorry for the essay Shock


Flowersandblack · 26/09/2018 09:47

Oh moody! That is awful but hilarious at the same time! Is it really bad I'm enjoying the stories from everyone else with experience of this!

My best friend has this at her youngest dd reception class. It's a mum this time. Every day the children are lined up and parents go to collect in the order their child is lined up.. should be easy!

Every day there's this kid in the class who won't line up like all the other kids instead he starts screaming hysterically so he gets brought to the front. The mum knows the second he sees her he will kick off so instead of waiting until it's his turn and then coming forward she tries pushing to the front before the class as even come out the class room to make absolute sure her kid will see her. The staff have told her and so have other parents that she should be encouraging her ds to wait like all the others as the order of the queue is different every day the kids soft of consider it a special treat to be at the front of the queue so they all get a turn (reception class) but nope every day she will make sure he spots her and will even call his name and wave if he isnt crying... causing him to start wailing dramatically.

The 2nd he comes out she puts a set of reigns on him.

OP posts:

Cheeseplantandpickle · 26/09/2018 10:01

Drop an email to the nursery manager.


ProfessorMoody · 26/09/2018 10:02

Reins in Reception? Goodness me.


Flowersandblack · 26/09/2018 10:10

Yep! I try not to judge too harshly as the child may have additional needs but then i do sort of think if he needs all this special treatment (from what my bf dd says his behaviour at school can be both disruptive and violent) we do live in an area with about 3 specialist schools all of which have an amazing reputation my brother and my bf oldest dd goes/went there but that's an entirely different thread I guess.

The issue in that story isn't the little boy it's the mum I'm kind of the opinion if you want your child to go to main stream school then that must mean you want them treated like every other child there in terms of the rules but I could get flamed for that comment.

OP posts:

Spudina · 26/09/2018 10:12

Reins at school. Wow. OP, complain to the nursery. You are probably not the only one who will complain.


Flowersandblack · 26/09/2018 10:15

Yeah i may complain to my dds key worker as she is really nice we do regularly chat aswell if there is time shes pretty down to earth I've seen her face before when the dad turns up and I can tell its definately wearing thin with her.

OP posts:
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