Angry Mum vs School. Who is Being Unreasonable?

[strawberrisc]

9 year old sneaks onto school trip. Gets mild telling off at home then parents blast the school. Who IBU? www.facebook.com/922716137773390/posts/2145294778848847/

In fairness I think schools are more concerned about missing children, not additional ones!

But she was also a missing kid, because she was meant to be in school and nobody noticed that she wasn’t. Imagine if instead of being on a school trip she had been abducted?

If @iborgia is correct, they would have had her name on the list therefore no one would have questioned it.

This girls is going places

Yes, prison in a few years if she's not careful, entitled little brat.

Safeguarding doesn't equal 100% perfection.

If the staff took a register, had a look, did a head count or any other boarding check then they did check.

No safeguarding procedure has a list if every possible nefarious act that has to be remedied prior to any activity being arranged. That would be ludicrous.

However, this school and these staff will now be held to a higher level of accountability and their SOP for trips will henceforth include checks more closely linked with the security services - mirror check under every seat and a sweep of the baggage area, perhaps.

Yes, they missed her sneaking off to get changed and sneaking onto the bus, but neither of those are normal/forseeable happenings - though they will be now in this LA!

And they did notice, 15 minutes away from school. She was returned to her parents and no harm was done.

With the additional info it become more obvious why she was so determined to go... and I am still full of sneaking admiration for her whilst irritated that her parents are trying to make a mountain out of a molehill.

YABU for being to lazy to post a link to the actual news article rather than Facebook.

The daughter should be excluded for a few days, she knew what she was doing and it was premeditated.

The parents should have noticed her taking a change of clothes into school, and are fame hungry by blaming the school.

I cant see the school or teachers can do much more. A nine year old is more than capable of distracting teachers or hiding under a bus seat with the help of her friends.

If a devious child and her friends are determined to break the rules its impossible to stop them.

If @iborgia is correct, they would have had her name on the list therefore no one would have questioned it.

Presumably parents had informed school of the change and the lists had been updated or she wouldn't have been discovered "missing" and brought back until pickup time.

I don't like the judging on name or picture in the paper here. What face exactly is she supposed to pull when her mum takes her to the papers about her bad behaviour? The two I saw could easily be embarrassed smirk and grim getting it over with respectively.

Don't think any of the parties involved come out of this looking good really.

It is easy for her to have had to stay on board for a long while once found. Coach drivers have strict legislation about the length of time that they are allowed to drive for. Turning around to return her might have delayed the entire trip by far too long. As they were on the motorway they could not simply pull over. It sounds like they transferred her at the first planned stop. Taking a register is a visual headcount but does not allow for someone hiding. If the coach was not full or had a toilet, it would be easy to hide and that is certainly not something that you would usually check for with a class of nine year olds. I should imagine that schools will now be including a count on the coach in the future but I can’t say it’s something you would predict would be necessary.

Sorry iborgia didn't mean to @ you again there I messed up the quote.

I should imagine that schools will now be including a count on the coach in the future but I can’t say it’s something you would predict would be necessary.
Every single trip I've run as a teacher had a head count on the coach as the last thing you do before driving off. Of course it's necessary. It's always been necessary.

If they head counted 61 children on the bus but were expecting 60 - then they would've recounted in seats coming to the correct figure.

It's easy to lose count when parents are distracting you asking questions and mentioning last min details!!

You are slassuming a head count didn't take place.

Little madam was probably banned from the trip for her exploits

If they head counted 61 children on the bus but were expecting 60 - then they would've recounted in seats coming to the correct figure.
Eh? You count children not seats!
The parents are not on the flaming bus so how could you get distracted.
This "little madam" 's behaviour highlighted lax procedures for which the school should be thankful. Next time they failed to count the children the outcome could have been much worse.

Ok

Teacher counts kids one by one as the get on the bus - counts 61 thinks that must be a mistake and recounts the kids whilst they are in their seats

they don't count the actual seats!

So why would they get the number 60 if 61 children were on the bus. You can't seriously think that a 9 year old child can instantly hide away unnoticed by the staff sitting at various points down the coach?

Or not spotted by the staff member walking the length of the coach counting heads

She probably hid. That will be the last trip those teachers organise and I am certain they will be considering new careers too!

My God if it was my kids I would be so angry with them. NOT looking for someone to blame.

You can't seriously think that a 9 year old child can instantly hide away unnoticed by the staff sitting at various points down the coach?

Have you been on a school bus?

Kids get on - teachers get on - head count and seatbelt check

Easy for extra child to hide - where do you think the teachers are at this point?

All the coach trips I led as a teacher had the adults sitting throughout the coach. I would never have had the staff /helpers at the front and all the kids behind. At least one member of staff would get on first to make sure the kids didn't push or shove and sat in the seats sensibly.

It's interesting that on a thread about a teenage boy who sneaked into his friend's school for the day he was decribed as hilarious and ingenious but a 9 year old girl who was stopped from going on a school trip with friends and sneaked onto it is described as a conniving little madam.
The journalist probably made her laugh for the photo. It's what they do

And what's with all the vile snobbery about the child's name?
Making fun of a child's name because it's perceived to be "common" how very Katie Hopkins of some mumsnetters

My God if it was my kids I would be so angry with them. NOT looking for someone to blame.
This^
Also the thread about the teenage boy sneaking into his friends' school on his day off was completely different and very funny. This little madam thought she would go on this trip despite being told she couldn't go and potentially freaking out a lot of teachers when they realised she was missing AND she's nine years old ffs!

The usual sexist rubbish about girls being nasty and scheming and boys being lovable rogues. The girl should have been allowed to go on an educational trip with her class. The mother is ridiculous punishing her by stopping her going on beneficial school trips and it would have been upsetting for her missing out when her classmates were going. She wouldn't have had an understanding of it getting adults into trouble at 9. FFS. The boy snuck in to a school he wasn't a member of for shits and giggles. If this story had been about a boy doubtless you would have been posting about what a hilarious cheeky chappy he was

Speculoos

The girl should have been allowed to go on an educational trip with her class.

From information (?) that has come out on the thread, she was pulled from the trip for a reason, that she did this proves that she can't be trusted.

Blimey, there are some fucking nasty comments about a child on this thread.

If the mother carries out her threat to ban her from all future school trips with no chance to redeem herself she is going to end up with an angry little girl which will make her behaviour worse not better.

I’m pretty sure that learning about consequences of your actions by being punished by your parent doesn’t turn children into “angry little girls.” Because most children learn boundaries that way