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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Taken his friend instead of me wtf

104 replies

Karigan198 · 24/09/2018 08:51

Totally prepared to be told I’m being unreasonable if it’s me! Also fully recognise it’s a first world problem lol.

My partner and I have been together just under 4 years. We both love a certain film series.

Yesterday he says to me ‘when. ** comes out in 2019 I have to go watch it with (his friend)’

They were good friends, used to live as housemates and saw all the others in the series together but he’s seen this guy twice in the last nearly 4 years!!

This is a film that he knows I love and intend to watch when it comes out.

He saw my face and changed it to ‘I’ll watch it twice, once with BF and then with you’

Now I don’t mind going with BF. Make it a group thing maybe, but to put a guy that he hasn’t even spoken to much for years ahead of me is pissing me off. Why can’t he watch it with me then go see it with BF for instance?

I’m probably being oversensitive as a few things are making me feel a bit useless at the moment (not him- medical)

OP posts:

DailyMailWankers · 24/09/2018 08:53

Can you gp watch it as a 3?

Original poster

Karigan198 · 24/09/2018 08:53

Didn’t notice the autocorrect- should of course be ‘taking’

OP posts:

MrsStrowman · 24/09/2018 08:54

Massive over reaction it's a shared tradition between old friends, he's said he'll see it with you too

Original poster

Karigan198 · 24/09/2018 08:54

I’d be happy with a 3 but DP wants to keep his special thing of watching it with this friend

OP posts:

user1471517900 · 24/09/2018 08:55

This isn't a problem at all. You're being way too oversensitive

Bluntness100 · 24/09/2018 08:58

Gosh, how old are you both? This is so petty. He's already agreed, and immediately to see it with you too.

NoodleEatingPoodle · 24/09/2018 08:59

He sounds like a good friend who doesn't want to just replace his friend in a longstanding tradition because he's now in a relationship. It's a film that comes out in 2019 and he's mentioned it to you now? He's asking you to understand that it's important to him.

ApolloandDaphne · 24/09/2018 09:00

He has made an off the cuff remark about something which won't even happen until next year and you are annoyed? How strange you are.

I imagine he was thinking about the film and the fun he and his friend have had over the years watching these together. They have a shared memory and he wants to continue that. I think this is fine. He probably forgot for a moment that you like these films too as you are not part of that older shared memory with his friend.

When the film does come out you can sort out who goes when with who. Until then forget about it.

DancingForTheDog · 24/09/2018 09:00

I'd just let him go with his mate and then go and see it with him soon after. It will be good for them to catch-up and if it's the film series I think it is, it's men who tend to be particularly nerdy and over invested in each new release so like to be amongst their own when a new one comes out.

adaline · 24/09/2018 09:01

What's the problem?

My mum and I have been to see every single Harry Potter film together, and we continued the tradition with Fantastic Beasts even though I was 27 at the time! And we'll be going to see the Crimes of Grindelwald together too, even though DH loves it, because it's our "thing".

DH will stay home with the dog.

Original poster

Karigan198 · 24/09/2018 09:01

Lol can’t be an overreaction if I didn’t react other than to look at him.

Also don’t get be wrong this was not a dispute it was a two minute conversation with no disagreement etc so as to the incredibly rude ‘how old are you both’ old enough not to start arguments over petty things.

OP posts:

Hengine · 24/09/2018 09:02

I have a film series that I would always watch with my sister.
Going as a 3 changes the dynamic.
Just watch it with him another time as he has suggestsed

adaline · 24/09/2018 09:02

But you don't seem to understand why he thought of his friend first. Your his partner, you live together and see each other everyday. Can't he have one thing he does with his friend?

If you weren't upset or bothered, why post in the first place? It's a bit of a non-event isn't it really?

JakeBallardswife · 24/09/2018 09:02

Gosh, just say something like, that’ll be great for you to catch up.

Whilst inwardly being slightly agitated, when it comes to it. Either you go too, or before/ after

user187656748 · 24/09/2018 09:02

I think once you go into year 12 you'll realise that this sort of thing doesn't matter to grown ups and you're being quite ridiculous.
Good luck with the GCSEs!

MaryShelley1818 · 24/09/2018 09:02

He’s going to go and watch it with both of you...really really don’t see a problem with this so YABVU.

SleepingStandingUp · 24/09/2018 09:03

Nah, he's seen the rest with him, he see's this one with him.

Who did you see all the others with?

longwayoff · 24/09/2018 09:04

O come on. Do you want him to come along with you and your friends on a 'girlsI night'? Let him off the leash

Twotailed · 24/09/2018 09:07

I think this is a mountain out of a molehill. He isn’t prioritising his friend over your relationship, he just wants to continue an old tradition that means something to him. And he’s even offered you a compromise where he will see it with you too.

Does it really matter if he has already seen it once when he goes with you? I understand that you’re happy to go as a three but that’s not the experience he wants. He wants to recreate the experience he has had before with his friend.

I would really not get upet over such a small thing, this really seems like a non-issue.

kenandbarbie · 24/09/2018 09:10

Is it avengers 4?
Misses point of thread

Peonylover123 · 24/09/2018 09:11

This is ridiculously petty. He has a life outside of you. Yes YABU.

Let the poor guy live his life. You sound like a teenager.

KlutzyDraconequus · 24/09/2018 09:12

Sounds a bit controling and jealous to me.
Flip the script,
"My Boyfriend wet funny because I want to go to a movie with an old friend and not them"

How many LTBs would that topic get?
Lots...

BitOutOfPractice · 24/09/2018 09:12

Is it national Total Non Problem Day today?

Babymamamama · 24/09/2018 09:14

You could go see this with a friend? Couples who have to do everything together can stifle each other. Not saying that is you but there is life outside of couples world.

Singlebutmarried · 24/09/2018 09:16

If it’s the Avengers series YABU

Your partner will just have to watch it twice. Once with you. Once with friend.

There is no limit on the amount of tones an avengers film can be watched. Fact.

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