To wonder why more people turn up at funeral?

[Thisgirlcant]

A 70 yr old lady I know has just died. She had a 70th birthday party in January which was quite well attended but not by any of her family who live down south (she lived yorkshire) most of her family are coming for the funeral.
Why do we all make more of an effort to attend funerals than parties?!

abacucat culturally we do the full wake and the funeral, both big affairs. In terms of food and drink, it's the works. Precisely why I'd like a small funeral, family and dear friends only. I've left instructions. All that show and pomp for what, really? As for the crate loads of food and booze...

I also actually don't want my DC's to be stressed by huge bills and arrangements to deal with at a time which will be already difficult enough for them.

Just bury me then a few close friends and family head off back to my home the place where I was happy for a good old drink and boogie and reminisce, that'll do..!

Ah okay! You live somewhere where the full wake is part of it. I live in England and few people do this.

Last funeral I went to two months ago, those who were part of the funeral procession which included me, met at the house the hearse was leaving from and had a few sherries and nibbles. We then proceeded to funeral. Afterwards buffet and free drink in nearby hotel for anyone. But nobody drank more than two drinks - most had none or a small one as they were driving. Most left within two hours. Very close family/friends back to same house for more drink and food until evening. 9 of us back at house for evening do. So certainly no one hanging about for any freebies.

abucat I live in England too🙂. Not English by heritage tho. Hence funeral done in different way perhaps but basically I just don't agree with the freeloading, and the stress of DCs having to deal with it.. normally alongside family who suggest the whole horse and carriage thing and more. It's so out of hand now. I know I won't be there but I still want my funeral to represent me and who I am if that makes sense. No fuss

@bigbean8 she was rude! Our local vicar tagged himself at the crematorium, I was another friend tags herself at funerals and gets all the 'hugs hun' 'thinking of you babes' ' gentle hugs' I find that very disrespectful. My step niece updated Her status to how excited she was to be able to go through red lights while following a hearse! (Her grandma)

I am not English by heritage, but most of the funerals I have went to have been English people. Obviously freeloading is not okay, but people will go to funerals who have not seen the person for ages, even if there is no free lunch. Luckily all my family want cheap funerals. No one has much money and want what we do have, spent on the living.