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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell a child off for removing her jumper by pulling it from the neck over her head

106 replies

Candymay · 23/09/2018 21:54

She’s 13. Am I wrong to feel shocked at seeing her pull her clothes off like this? She was trying on an expensive knitted jumper. It was meant for her smaller sister but she didn’t realise. She then took one hand and grabbed the neckline and dragged it off over her head with me standing shocked and appalled. Am I wrong to make a fuss? It hadn’t occurred to me that she didn’t know how to undress properly. In my opinion this is ‘wrong’.

OP posts:
TrashPanda · 23/09/2018 23:03

I mostly do crossed arms across my front and lift from the hem up, sometimes turn the item completely inside out, other times pull sleeves off once over my head. Sometimes I do the arms first and then push up over my head from inside like BackforGood. I can't do over the head by the neck because my long thick hair gets pulled and stuck and it annoys me.

I am teaching my 3 year old the second way. 9 year old was taught that by me and the pull over head by the neck by DP who always takes tops off that way.

All are valid ways of removing tops and I can't imagine getting worked up about how the top gets taken off as long as it's folded to reuse or put in the wash and not dumped on the floor in a heap.

LemonysSnicket · 23/09/2018 23:05

I take the hem and pull it up and off in one fell swoop. So that's 3 ways of removal on this thread... interesting

DarklyDreamingDexter · 23/09/2018 23:12

She's your child...Why didn't you show her the 'correct way' (or rather, your approved way) of removing a jumper when she was about 4? Just show her now and say pulling it off by the neck might stretch it a bit. No telling off, no drama. What on earth do you want from this thread OP? "Am I wrong to make a fuss?" Yes, you are, why make a big deal of something so trivial. It's not even someone else's child whose parents have been caught slacking - you taught her to get dressed didn't you?!

Gersemi · 23/09/2018 23:14

"Shocked and appalled" by the way someone takes their jumper off? WTF? How do you cope with life? I hate to think about how you would react to something that is genuinely shocking and appalling.

Gersemi · 23/09/2018 23:19

In my mind the ‘correct’ way is sleeves first and then over the head.

But that pulls the sleeves out of shape. If there's any correct way at all, it's the one where you cross your arms and pull the jumper up from the front and over your head with the sleeves following after. But to be honest whatever suits the wearer is absolutely fine.

bevelino · 23/09/2018 23:21

I honestly think that some people start ridiculous threads and then wait to see how many responses they get.

mumeeee · 23/09/2018 23:22

YABU. I take jumpers off like this and so does DH. The jumpers are all fine

BuntyII · 23/09/2018 23:22

Shocked and appalled? As long as you didn't snap and fart OP

DontMakeMeShushYou · 23/09/2018 23:24

Men do it this way. Women cross their arms in front of them and then pull it up from the hem. I don't know why.

Certainly in my family this is what happens. Me, DSIS, DD, and my mum all do the crossed arms thing (i.e. hold the hem by the left seam with your right hand and the hem by the right seam with your left hand. Then bring your arms over your head, uncrossing them as you go). My dad, DH, and my son do the pulling from the back of the neck thing and they invariably look like they're trying to fight their way out paper bag. I had no idea so many people also did this. It just looks so ungainly! Grin The arms first thing only works for me if I'm wearing loose fitting clothes.

busybuildingdens · 23/09/2018 23:28

Gosh! I don’t think I’ve ever even thought about teaching my DC the ‘correct’ way to take off their jumpers. They just do it, and I couldn’t tell you what technique they use. Or me for that matter!

Onecutefox · 23/09/2018 23:37

I don't understand. Did she pull the jumper down or up? Normally, to take the jumper off I would pull it up not to stretch the neckline. It's also easier. Even small children do it.

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 23/09/2018 23:53

Clearly you didn’t teach her the correct way then Grin

LydiaLunch7 · 23/09/2018 23:55

They just do it, and I couldn’t tell you what technique they use. Or me for that matter

I'm trying to remember how I do it now but I just can't! I guess I'll have to pay attention when I get changed tonight.

Thinking about the neck thing though, I'm pretty sure you can do that without pulling so hard that you stretch the top. And by pretty sure I mean 100% sure.

SummerIsEasy · 24/09/2018 00:00

My mother’s generation call them pullovers. That must be why.

Redglitter · 24/09/2018 00:49

Shocked & appalled?? 😂😂😂

Oh to have so little to get upset about

palmfaceouch · 24/09/2018 01:13

Huh??

Say what now?

straightjeans · 24/09/2018 06:31

Over reaction. I pull my jumpers off by pulling the bottom over my head, but that's only because I don't wear make up.

TeddybearBaby · 24/09/2018 07:53

These things are rarely actually about the small thing that irritated you. It’s just the trigger. For example I might think to myself without even realising ‘my son is so sloppy and treats his possessions with no respect’. It’ll annoy me subconsciously and then I may overreact later on down the line about something similar to you. Maybe think of it on a deeper level, why did it annoy you so much........ Have a nice day!

ProfessorMoody · 24/09/2018 08:00

I truly wish that something like this was all I had to worry about.

Oysterbabe · 24/09/2018 08:12

Well there's another thing I didn't know I was doing wrong.

notacooldad · 24/09/2018 08:19

Men do it this way. Women cross their arms in front of them and then pull it up from the hem. I don't know why.
Oh I better have a word with my mum and sister and tell them they are doing it wrong and they need to pull it from the neck.....oh, won't, that's wrong as well!

SmiledWithTheRisingSun · 24/09/2018 08:21

Eh? Hmm

Strugglingtodomybest · 24/09/2018 08:32

I just wondered whether anyone else would think this was even something to mention or to be cross about.

Please don't mention it, it's pretty pathetic and your DD will probably not appreciate it.

Iooselipssinkships · 24/09/2018 08:32

YABU for being so dull enough to make a thread about this.

ushuaiamonamour · 24/09/2018 08:49

Candymay If I'm following you, she pulls at the edge of the neck to get her arms out of the sleeves? If the jumper were in synthetic yarn & in no way flimsy I don't think much harm would be done. If it were in a wool one I wouldn't be best pleased--it's much of the same order as drying a wool jumper on a hanger. If it were a jumper I'd knitted for her, I imagine that just in reflex I'd call out 'Stop!' in a quite urgent tone of voice. (Tugging like that can distort yarn in the long run, and if the yarn is something like merino the extra rubbing it causes will show up.)

I reserve my 'shocked and appalled' reactions for people who put milk in first, insist that no one use the guest towels, or use candles before nightfall but I'd explain to her why that isn't a great way to treat a jumper.