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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think life shouldn’t be easier for those on benefits than those who work?

605 replies

Alwaysoverdrawn · 21/09/2018 16:19

obviously not including the disabled, elderly etc in this

I am so fed up of being poor so I looked into doing an access course to increase my earning potential. My sister is doing one and is currently on benefits, she gets it for free with her childcare paid.

Having spoken to them, we earn too much to be considered for help. Having looked into mine and my sisters finances I think this is frankly bloody ridiculous. We are worse off than her ffs.

We make around £2,500 NET p/m, £1000 rent, £900 childcare -2 adults, 2 kids. So £600 ‘disposable’ pm with a lot of debts to pay.

She gets £670pm plus her full rent paid and a council tax reduction for her and one child.

AIBU to think life shouldn’t be ‘easier’ for those on benefits than those who work?

DP hasn’t been to the dentist despite needing to for years as he can’t afford treatment, I’m really down today. Seriously considering moving out so that I can claim benefits and get out of this horrible rut.

OP posts:
user1490465531 · 22/09/2018 16:15

Elvira you sound so envious of single parents try being one and you can see the day to day reality.
You have your own home,a job and a partner but your still jeleous at what you perceive single parents get.
Perhaps you would like to see us begging in the street might make you feel smug for a miniute.

Graphista · 22/09/2018 16:21

Cantankerous if I made a personal attack on op or anyone else report it, or even state it. I know I haven't.

Whereas op made several - calling people idiots and stupid for not agreeing with her and disingenuously claiming 'that's not what I meant' when in her first few posts it was very clear EXACTLY what she meant!

HelenaDove · 22/09/2018 16:28

Re the 90s timewarp Im adjusting it to a 2008 timewarp When the right wing press were leading everyone to believe that ill/disabled people on Incapacity Benefit got free prescriptions and their rent and council tax paid THEY DIDNT DH was on IB and we had to pay for his prescriptions 3 quarters of the rent and same with council tax We had £40 a week to live on after that and that included food clothes and hospital parking. it was impossible.

hes over state pension age now but back then it was fucking hard.

People on IB did not get free prescriptions and rent despite what the press were saying.

CantankerousCamel · 22/09/2018 16:28

Wasn’t clear to me or any of the other people who actually read her OP.

Of course the natural reaction to someone who has had to deal with a really shit situation and not being able to better themselves is to have a jolly laugh wirh your friends about goats and TV’s.

It WAS idiotic and you DID all look like idiots. I’m not surprised the OP reacted.

She said that income should be the basis for government support, not a ‘on benefits’ check list.

She’s right.

CantankerousCamel · 22/09/2018 16:29

The above post was to graphista and the only thing ‘disingenuous’ here have been the champagne socialists failing over themselves to attack a suffering member of the working class to prove their wokeness.

Utterly galling

Original poster
Alwaysoverdrawn · 22/09/2018 16:30

I don’t know why I keep coming back but I feel I need to defend myself. Graphista, please state where I’ve called anyone an idiot or stupid for not agreeing me? I did call someone a buffoon after she made an assumption about my life after taking 12 pages or so of abuse.
My first few posts state ‘I don’t begrudge her the money, I don’t think she’s living the life of luxury, she’s doing what she can to give my niece a nice life, I know benefits aren’t easy for everyone, I have no problem with those on benefits’ so I take it you either haven’t actually read my posts or are hoping to continue playing a victim card and making me out to be the evil witch.

OP posts:
Original poster
Alwaysoverdrawn · 22/09/2018 16:32

And as CantankerousCamel said, anyone that actually read what I was saying rather than jumping on the ‘don’t bash the benefits’ band wagon will understand that I was not saying anything was wrong with those on benefits, but what was wrong was that working people should also be considered for support and opportunities as it’s not so clear cut that working = rich, unemployed = poor.

OP posts:
AamdC · 22/09/2018 16:42

Oh and the oh so hilirious jokes about goats and widescreen tv,s were never very funny Hmm

CantankerousCamel · 22/09/2018 16:43

always

Any company or charity who deal with poverty understand the concept of the working poor.

Unfortunately that basic economic understanding haven’t penetrated the skulls of mumsnet. Don’t let it get to you.

I was told that £50 a week was enough to feed a family of 4, I agreed it was but not enough to feed well and that everyone should be capable of providing a minimum of £120 a week in food for their families. I was SLAUGHTERED by many people who have posted on this thread despite shelter and the trussell trust agreeing that £130 is the minimum a family of four need to provide a decent, balanced and varied diet.

It is literally just people failing over themselves to show how ‘down wirh the poor’ They are despite spectacularly missing the point and actually just being horrible human beings.

They get a kick out of it, it’s not you

UpstartCrow · 22/09/2018 16:48

OP, you could have posted about your situation without mentioning other peoples benefits at all. You could have asked for benefits to be extended up the financial ladder a bit. But you didnt.

CantankerousCamel · 22/09/2018 16:49

But it is relative to the question!!!

On one hand the government is saying ‘you are poor enough to need help’

On the other hand ‘you don’t need help you don’t claim benefits’

Despite the income being the same.

It is relevant

Babyg1995 · 22/09/2018 16:53

Well no I was on benifits for 2 year due to leaving bad relationship it was shit always skint even though I got rent ect paid I Now work full time as does new fiance life couldn't be better we are very comfortable but we don't have debt and our rent is lower than yous but still in a lovely area mabey look at getting somewhere cheaper if you are struggling so much.

Original poster
Alwaysoverdrawn · 22/09/2018 16:54

Upstart, if I’d have done that without a comparison I’d have been bombarded with people saying ‘there’s no way your poor on that income ffs, people on benefits are much harder up - they need the help’ just like people have still done, even with my comparison.
Fact is I have the same (less) amount of money to pay my bills, food and live with 4 people as my sister does on benefits with 2 people yet she would be entitled to help as she can ‘tick the benefits box’ and im not, how else would I have got that point across?

OP posts:
flopsyrabbit1 · 22/09/2018 16:56

People on IB did not get free prescriptions and rent despite what the press were saying

you did if income based,its exactly the same with ESA

HelenaDove · 22/09/2018 17:01

So why wasnt IB listed on the back of the prescription then.

BanginChoons · 22/09/2018 17:12

Have you looked at Stonebridge for your access? They accept the advanced learner loan I believe.

I've had a look and I still can't see how your sister got it for free? Benefits or not.

I did an Access course as a single parent on benefits. I was in college for 3 days a week and was granted childcare funding to cover that. The studying I did in the evenings when my 2 preschoolers were in bed, but with 2 poor sleepers and early mornings it was an exhausting year. It got me where it needed to but I had no life (and no spare cash either).

HelenaDove · 22/09/2018 17:13

forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=43522

IB and prescriptions.

Graphista · 22/09/2018 17:18

"ignorant people hear the figure and dismiss that people like me may need help"

There's a now deleted post where she directly called me an idiot who thought only people on benefits could be poor - which I don't think and never said! (Mnhq free to delete this post if referring to a deleted one is an issue).

Also some delightful comments claiming people are commenting without reading/understanding what op's written like

"Perhaps you should read."

"Read the fucking thread, don’t make a judgement"

"My kids are 6 years apart you buffoon. I just came back to tell you that as your smug niave attitude is grating on me."

Claims she answered re why such a high rent when she hasn't, simply said why they won't move.

And I've read every single post!

CantankerousCamel · 22/09/2018 17:36

I haven’t denied she called you or anyone else an idiot, graphista

I would feel much the same about a bunch of champagne swigging virtue signallers who can’t read.

HTH

CantankerousCamel · 22/09/2018 17:37

The OP, nor anyone since, has mentioned prescriptions.

HelenaDove · 22/09/2018 17:40

Camel i know they havent I was using it as an example not to believe everything thats seen in the press.

flopsyrabbit1 · 22/09/2018 17:41

HelenaDove apologiesBlush

ive got it mixed up when my ex was on incapacity and income support,we must have go it on that

CantankerousCamel · 22/09/2018 17:45

Helena

Nobody has said anything about ‘the press’ people have talked about their personal situations and those of people very close to them.

Graphista · 22/09/2018 17:46

Neither I nor I think others who've taken the same stance are 'champagne socialists' I'm from very much working class parents, managed to luckily achieve 2 degrees (without their support as they weren't in a position to give it) and spent most of my adult life working in not massively well paid jobs and basically just getting by!

As a result of a car accident, I've now a physical disability and that impacted on already poor mental health. I managed to keep going for a few years after that but other circumstances and worsening of the physical condition mean I'm no longer able to work. Which I hate! That alone has contributed to a worsening of the mh issues! Ironically.

dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/champagne-socialist