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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How to lower my child’s BMI?

260 replies

Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 14:52

She is currently on the 99th percentile. About 4 months ago, we cut out takeaways. We had a dominoes every week, sometimes a curry too. Sometimes a McDonald’s as well. Food was pretty processed and crap. Now I cook homemade, healthy meals. No takeaways. I also enrolled her on two after school activities which are great exercise. This is the new lifestyle now, that we are fully sticking to. But, her weight does not look like it’s gone down at all.. will it gradually? I weighed/measured her in July ( under the guise of testing the machine at the leisure centre before I had a go, as I don’t want to make her self conscious ) should I weigh her again to check? I just don’t want her to worry that I’m weighing her again. Should I make more changes?

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Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 14:53

She’s 11 years old

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ambereeree · 21/09/2018 14:55

What about portion size? Is she eating too much?

gendercritter · 21/09/2018 14:56

What is a typical day of food for her?

You've done so well to cut the processed stuff. I would give it another couple of months as things are - at the moment it's probably as good for her to stay the same weight (things will even out as she grows) as it is to lose weight.

But otherwise what are her portion sizes like? Can you cut any unnecessary snacks? Does she have access to junk at school or anything that you don't know about?

Runsforwine · 21/09/2018 14:57

Maybe her portion sizes are too big, my dd is 9 and I have to watch her food intake, as she will just keep going and eat 2nds and 3rds if left unchecked! No snacks, a 15 min walk on the days she has no clubs? You are doing the right thing, well done!

NoProbLlama78 · 21/09/2018 14:57

How tall is she? You may not need to if she grows and her weight evens out into a lower bmi.

BringBiscuits · 21/09/2018 14:57

I don’t think you have to weigh her to be able to tell if the new lifestyle is working. You’ll see it in her clothes and her face. It will take time to see results but do stick with it. You’ll be glad you did. Keep up the good work.
I think the changes you’ve made are a great start. Can you start walking to school? Can you swim as a family at weekends? Does she have a bike? Can she start dance classes?

PinkDaffodil2 · 21/09/2018 14:58

Hey, it sounds like her weight hasn’t changed in 4 months - is that right? If so then her BMI will be getting gradually lower as she continues to get taller, so that is a positive change! Certainly stick with the changes you’ve made and see if there are a couple of other things you could gradually have such as walking more, portion size or fewer sugary drinks (including too much fruit juice).

Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 14:58

She’s got a huge appetite. Not so much at breakfast. She has 40g cereal or a slice of wholemeal bread with beans or a boiled egg. Lunch is whatever she has from the school canteen. Doesn’t usually want an after school snack. Dinner, she’ll have an appropriately sized portion then want more. I’ll let her have a bit more if there’s any left over. She always clears her plate.

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Ennirem · 21/09/2018 14:58

Have you considered looking at portion sizes, esp for carbs? Even really good nutritious food can make you large if you're eating too much of it (says the voice of bitter experience! Grin). It's surprising how small the correct portion sizes are - actually measure out the recommended portion of pasta/rice/breakfast cereal and it looks pathetic. But you can bulk it out with veg and lean proteins if it is leaving you or her hungry.

Potentially you could also go swimming together every week? If you could afford membership at a reasonably nice pool with a spa pool etc you could frame it as 'girl's time' with mum, a good swim followed by a little pamper and maybe a film at home with some plain popcorn.

Seriously though it sounds like you have already done loads and made positive changes to your whole family's lifestyle, whilst being sensitive to her. Keep doing what you're doing! Star

WhiteCoyote · 21/09/2018 15:00

Is she secretly snacking? During school or buying things on the way home and hiding them?

Fiffyshadesofgreymatter · 21/09/2018 15:00

It's probably portion size. And often what you think is healthy actually isn't, so check what you're cooking. I used to make a site fry that was packed with veg and super tasty and then I got my fitbit and put it into the calorie counter and OMG. It's all the extra thing added and the nuts etc that all put up the calorie content. So just check that you're making good choices with cooking and being careful with quantity of stuff.
Also, kids should have 60 minutes if activity a day. Could you perhaps go for a nice family wall after dinner or something each night?

TakeAChanseyOnMe · 21/09/2018 15:00

Has she shown any sign of puberty yet? She might be about to shoot up - one of my brothers was very overweight as a child, when he grew about 1ft he still weighed the same.

Otherwise weight is 90% diet so likely portions are too big. Drinks such as milk and fruit just all add up.

Ennirem · 21/09/2018 15:00

Packed lunch might also be a good idea because if her school canteen is anything like mine was (chocolate donuts two for a pound!) and she has free choice, she might well be buying garbage which could be scuppering your efforts.

Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 15:00

I’ve not weighed her to check loss as I don’t want her to have a complex. She just doesn’t look as though she’s lost any weight. The changes are working as my husband and I have lost over 3 stone between us. I’m trying not to weigh her again out of curiosity, but I’d love to know that the changes are having an effect on her bmi

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Confusedbeetle · 21/09/2018 15:01

Lifestyle changes are great but they take time and you wont notice results straight away. If you need help go to a dietician/nutritional expert, NOT a diet person

Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 15:02

She loves her school dinners. I know she tends to have pasta/a blt, flavoured water and a cookie. I don’t want her to feel out of place from her peers which all seem to eat similar at school. It’s difficult

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Ennirem · 21/09/2018 15:02

Oh yes and also about the secret snacking. I did this a LOT as a tubby teen and still do under stress, packet of ginger nuts currently in desk drawer that won't last the day . It's amazing how many empty calories you can buy with very little money.

Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 15:03

Finding that fine line between tackling it without making her feel self conscious

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Fiffyshadesofgreymatter · 21/09/2018 15:03

A school dinner is not going to stop her weight loss. The portion sizes are not big enough!

Let her have her school dinner if that's what she wants. Just up your family activity if you can.

Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 15:05

Thank you all, I feel ashamed about what a bad food rut we’d got in to. Started puberty, so perhaps due a growth spurt too

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MinisterforCheekyFuckery · 21/09/2018 15:06

If you don't know what she's choosing from the school canteen that could be having a big impact. It could be pizza/chips/a burger five times a week. Is there any way to check? I work in a school and parents can log in to an online portal to see what their DC are buying. Also portion control- is she having the same as you and DH?

Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 15:06

Should I say no to seconds of healthy food? I mean, it’s healthy but she’s then technically be over-eating?

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Ennirem · 21/09/2018 15:07

It's really tricky I agree. I had a few well meant 'interventions' on my weight as a teen, but all they did was make me more self conscious and more secretive and obsessive about getting extra food. How does she feel about her weight? I'd be surprised if at 11 she doesn't have some view on the matter if she's noticably bigger than her peers... could be worth a (very gentle) heart to heart just to test the waters... but give it another couple of months first, as PPs say it can take time!

CherryPavlova · 21/09/2018 15:07

Are you getting medical advice? 99 th percentile at 11 is quite serious - which luckily you seem to have realised. Please don’t take internet advice about a child’s diet you’ll get all sorts of conflicting and inaccurate advice. Go to your GP and get a referral to a paediatric dietician. There may well be special schemes in your area and there will certainly be safe nutritional plans to support you and your family.

Original poster
Poolofjoy · 21/09/2018 15:07

She probably is eating as much as us by the time she’s eaten seconds

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