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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

next door becoming a playground for non school goers

228 replies

TryingToBeMorePositive · 19/09/2018 16:14

I know I will be told to get my nose out of other people's business and what not but thought I will ask anyway and take the abuse.
I have some neighbours who are eastern european ( I am only pointing this out as non of them speak very good English so I have struggled to talk to them already). They originally moved in as one man, two women and young teenager boy before summer. He did not attend school. Now the new term has started he is still not attending school. Now 2 or 3 women have moved in or spend a long time round at the house and there are more younger boys in the house, I have seen a total of 3 together. There could be more. Now none of these children are going to school. They do not seem to be home educated as the majority of these people spend their time outside so we can see what they are up to, 4ft fences.
I have googled and not come up with an answer on whether I can report the children for not being in education. But I am also unsure whether I should just ignore the situation as it's non of my business. Feel free to tell me and then I can reassure myself to do so. But then do we have an obligation to report this? WWYD

OP posts:
silky1985 · 21/09/2018 18:19

You can report them for overcrowding if you think there are more people than bedrooms and you might find they are running an illegal daycare. Call the local council and then social services they will both keep it anonymous .

ChipmunksInAttic · 21/09/2018 18:49

we are foreigners as well, came here on a tier 2 visa and i can’t speak english very well sometimes too. it was not easy to settle in a new country and could be different for everybody. before reporting them, why don’t you take a cake and ring their doorbell, and try to chat with them to understand what’s going on? i can’t think of any reason why they don’t send their children to school and yes this is an issue if they have no plans to do so, but reporting them without knowing what’s going on could cause troubles for them, and for their right of stay in the country.

lisahpost · 21/09/2018 19:01

You Should mind your own business ! How do you know they aren’t learning ! Home education doesn’t have to happen during school hours or at a desk !

lolalola19 · 21/09/2018 19:10

Get them reported - phone the council etc they’ll already be living in that house for free/very little anyway. If you don’t report them more and more will come, move in and fill up the house, continuing to cause you problems.
It is fair enough ‘trying to be nice’ but liberties are being taken already and will continue to be.

zzzzz · 21/09/2018 19:19

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Jogonandshutup · 21/09/2018 19:32

zzzzz of course someone would say that - can’t say anything these days without someone getting offended; doesn’t matter what nationality they are, if they’re taking liberties and not sending their kids to school, filling the house with inconsiderate noisy freeloaders it’s hardly going to be nice for OP is it?

zzzzz · 21/09/2018 19:36

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Jogonandshutup · 21/09/2018 19:49

Of course - that’s obviously it! Good job I don’t care 😬

GrumbleBumble · 21/09/2018 20:06

The problem isn't genuine homeeders, the problem is people using homeed as an excuse to withdraw their kids from the system then not educating them/ neglecting/abusing/criminalising them but the resistance to checks by actual homeeders lets them get away with it.

zzzzz · 21/09/2018 20:11

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celticprincess · 21/09/2018 20:16

I’d also suspect they could be waiting on school places. A little girls recently started my daughter’s class and they had to wait 6 weeks for a place. Her eldest sister was told it would be at lest a 6 month wait for out only high school so the mother did opt to send her across boundaries to another school so she was in school but she could have opted to wait.

We also have a lot of new Syrian families at our school. It does take them a while to get settled, allocated a social worker and interpreter etc and be able to complete the relevant paper work to get school places. And then there could be a wait.

They could well be receiving out of school education. They can’t possibly be playing outside your house 24/7.

abacucat · 21/09/2018 22:36

Nope there are HE who abuse, neglect and educationally neglect their kids as well.

GrumbleBumble · 21/09/2018 23:23

abacucat yes of course there are, I didn't mean to imply there weren't. Sadly there will always be abusers in any group of society and no system is watertight. What I meant was I feel that there is currently a dirty great loophole in the system that nasty bastards can exploit and they won't be taking their kids to HE groups and tutors, they will be isolating them. Anyone genuinely HE should be giving their kids lots of social interaction opportunities and hopefully abuse/neglect would be picked up in the same way as hopefully it would be picked up through school for school education children. It's the ability to totally remove a child for all contact with the outside world that seriously concerns me.

Feelings · 22/09/2018 10:04

And they do give them social interaction except all the other HE parents turn a blind eye and pretend it's part of being home ed.

GrumbleBumble · 22/09/2018 10:30

If they won't police themselves they should to open to outside inspection (yes, yes I know this wouldn't be infallible). Those children are fairly likely to have contact we none HE groups as well who are less likely to find a child's reluctance to bathe a heart warming validation of allowing small children to make all the decisions.

zzzzz · 22/09/2018 11:00

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LikesAnimalPark · 22/09/2018 11:32

zzzzz funnily enough the one person I heard say that HE'ers should monitor each other was the family that plenty had concerns about children smelling and lack of supervision and hygiene.

zzzzz · 22/09/2018 12:41

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Icanttakemuchmore · 22/09/2018 15:02

I'd mind my own business. If they're not in school it's more places for those that do want education!

Alpacanorange · 22/09/2018 15:23

The kids need educating, I would ask the appropriate department for advice.

BlueEyedBengal · 22/09/2018 15:38

Human trafficking perhaps?Hmm

conservativeuterus · 22/09/2018 16:48

I don't know why you are getting such vitriol Zzzzz. Unfortunately some people just don't like other people making different choices. Fear of the unknown maybe.

There has been plenty of incidences of abuse in schools (a news report was released recently about children in primary schools being raped), teachers abusing, cases of child abuse not being picked up, rampant bullying, or children being known to be in abusive situations and nothing is done.

When HomeEd is mentioned it automatically provokes a knee jerk nasty reaction in some people. Who knows why. All of the HomeEdders I have met are very invested in their children.

abacucat · 22/09/2018 17:24

Because there is no system to monitor kids being HE. Some HE kids are fine and do well, others need intervention from authorities. If they were in school there are systems in place to intervene - remember only the worst abused kids have SS involvement. Schools intervene in lots of cases that do not meet SS threshold. There is nothing for those kids if they are HE.
It has NOTHING to do with being so called anti HE - I am not. But I do think HE who are against any regulatory system at all, basically don't really care about HE children who are being abused or neglected.
Devon Council has introduced its own regulation for HE.
And saying kids are abused in school is beside the point. No system is perfect, every system has failures, but there needs to be some system that at least tries to pick up these cases and intervenes.
I also disagree that all HE are strongly invested in their kids education. As I said I have seen HE strongly recommended by other HE to parents struggling with getting their kids to school on time for example.

zzzzz · 22/09/2018 17:30

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conservativeuterus · 22/09/2018 17:35

Its not legal for Devon to have its own system. They cannot do that legally, but it obviously hasn't stopped them, but they could be challenged in court and would have to back down. Law around Home Ed is clear.

I said all the HomeEdders I had met were invested in their children, not ALL home edders.