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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Topless men and bikini clad women at children's play area and outdoor paddling pool ?

102 replies

Mummaluelae · 19/09/2018 13:47

Probably a pet peeve of mine tbh. I just dislike it. Think its a bit wrong. This is in my area, and the seafront is literally round the corner from the play area and paddling pool. I do not have an issue if they are on the beach. But it seems men and women with minimal clothing sit in play area, some are not even with children. Plus its not a supervised pool because water is only say 5inches so no one to inform of this.
What are your thoughts?

OP posts:

PhilomenaButterfly · 19/09/2018 14:16

None of this is indecent.

Original poster

Mummaluelae · 19/09/2018 14:16

Deffo concerning about adults with no kids yes.
My area is crazy so many people walk wearing next to nothing even on high street!
Just seems strange to me to see kids playing then woman bending over in tiny bikinis popping out of them in front of everyone's kids.
The pool is specifically for under 10's so really adults shouldn't be half naked there in my opinion

OP posts:

lolaflores · 19/09/2018 14:17

Your perv radar maybe calibrated a little too highly. Just because people are a bit under dressed does not make them sexual predators, or exhibitionists or somehow inappropriate around kids.

noobs18 · 19/09/2018 14:18

Wow, try to unclench op. I dread to think what issues surrounding body image your kids are going to grow up with if swimwear is only acceptable in your own home! You are being so insanely unreasonable you should be embarrassed. I genuinely feel sorry for your kids, I'd recommend getting some therapy so you don't pass your unhealthy issues onto them

For those asking why adults without kids are in the kids area, I'd bet anything this paddling pool is in a park of some kind and the adults are, perfectly reasonably, sitting in the park. Op won't admit that though as it makes her issue even more ridiculous!

LydiaLunch7 · 19/09/2018 14:19

Am I right?

In a word: No.

Grumpasaurus · 19/09/2018 14:19

Sorry op- you are being unreasonable. I loved kids paddling pools because they usually have nice lounging areas and they are nicer to dip in than the sea. No sand, no salt water, no pebbles, no algae and usually nice coffee nearby.

I am sure women are just wearing bikinis. Not the end of the world. Kids need to learn bodies aren't something to be ashamed of.

PhilomenaButterfly · 19/09/2018 14:19

This is as stupid as DD 11 not being allowed to wear a tankini for school swimming lessons "because they ride up". Surely not so much that you'd see a nipple?

JoggerBottom · 19/09/2018 14:19

I don't see a problem with it...human bodies are normal. Although if I did have a problem, it would be because I don't have enough body confidence to walk around in a bikini myself!

YeTalkShiteHen · 19/09/2018 14:19

The pool is specifically for under 10's so really adults shouldn't be half naked there in my opinion

Then they’re cheeky fuckers if they don’t have under 10s with them.

Notacluewhatthisis · 19/09/2018 14:19

So should kids be banned from the beach or swimwear banned at the beach.

Exactly why is it bad for children to see this at a pool but not bad at the beach?

PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 19/09/2018 14:20

Well there is swimwear and there is swimwear.

90% of the time I would not give a monkeys but if someone with one of those Love Island micro ‘hungry arse’ bikinis with their nipples poking out strolled into the children’s area I would not be too impressed.

OuchLegoHurts · 19/09/2018 14:20

You're absolutely crazy

PorkFlute · 19/09/2018 14:20

How is it any different to when people bend over at the beach though? There are kids playing there too.

MiggledyHiggins · 19/09/2018 14:21

A child can drown in a few inches of water, so if the pool is for under 10's then they should be supervised by parents at all times.

And if I'm supervising my DC where I potentially might have to go in to them, then I'll wear stuff that is appropriate -like swimwear and flip flops. Hardly going to wear jeans and boots if I'm likely to get wet.

Grumpasaurus · 19/09/2018 14:22

I think people need to remember that children under 10 don't see adults as sexual beings. They are just kids being kids. Only adults see other adults as sexual beings, which is true regardless of whether they are the beach / club / home / office / etc. Kids will only have an issue if we teach them to- so we shouldn't!

LastOneDancing · 19/09/2018 14:24

In a world of plastic boobs and digitally altered images, I think it's good that children get an oppertunity to see the bodies of actual, everyday people with skin rolls, moles and wobbly bits.

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 19/09/2018 14:24

There isn’t an issue here, OP. Stop trying to make one.

Nobody is doing anything wrong.

LydiaLunch7 · 19/09/2018 14:28

I think people need to remember that children under 10 don't see adults as sexual beings

Exactly! OP, if it's a pool for under 10s, then none of the kids there are gonna have any interest whatsoever in what the adults are or are not wearing. So it's purely your issue, not theirs!

pigsDOfly · 19/09/2018 14:29

Agree OP is trying to make an issue of a non issue.

Either that, or you have a very strange attitude towards the human body.

Rhiannon13 · 19/09/2018 14:34

As long as the 'main bits' are covered up, and the clothing is appropriate (swimwear at a paddling pool - obviously ok), what's the problem?

Surely it's more healthy to see a variety of adult body shapes in a safe, real, appropriate setting than to only ever have access to filtered, fake Instagram images? Or else how will they know that their body is 'normal' when they start to become aware of it in the future?

There is no issue here OP.

TrumpsTinyCheesyWotsit · 19/09/2018 14:34

@Mummaluelae
Deffo concerning about adults with no kids yes

No. I have 4 children. I went on holiday once without my kids and sat quite happily watching other peoples kids going down the flumes. AND I WAS WEARING A BIKINI!!! Seeing children having a good time is one of the best things in life, ever. There is nothing at all wrong with it and tbh its you that has sexualised your own children by suggesting that a few adults are watching them inappropriately while sitting half naked in pool/beach wear that is perfect for the setting. I would be more concerned if they were in full clothing or fancy dress!

But I do agree it isn't right that men wear shorts and women wear bikinis. I think women should be able to go topless too as nipples are only there to feed babies and have been overly sexualised as mens play things instead of functional body parts.

5Yearplan4000 · 19/09/2018 14:35

Are you a Muslim Op?

stepmummamumma · 19/09/2018 14:37

Is this made up? Surely you can see that you are being completely unreasonable?!

SomeKnobend · 19/09/2018 14:40

If you don't unbleached a bit you might be sucked up your own arsehole and disappear completely. People wear swimwear at a swimming pool. If you genuinely think this is an issue you need to get a grip, immediately.

TeddybearBaby · 19/09/2018 14:40

My son (11) just noticed women being topless abroad this year. He was so shocked at first. Couldn’t believe his eyes. I thought it was funny. It’s just a pair of boobs really.

I think I’d be more jealous than anything of these youngsters with their lean bodies - sod off to your own area 😂

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