To just get rid of it all?

[Hoardernomore]

So far this week I’ve got rid of 18 bags of rubbish / recycling / stuff for charity shop from our average sized house. I’m still going.
I’ve got rid of christening cards, scan photos, wedding cards, thanks you cards, Mother’s Day cards, baby memory boxes, new baby stuff and momentoes. All gone. Drawings by the kids, photos, hand made stuff from school and nursery.
Also gone are all my books and cds, toys my children don’t use, random stuff we’ve accumulated like wires that I have no idea of their purpose anymore.
My gran died last year and she’d kept so much, and we had to chuck most of it. I’ve concluded it is all just stuff, at some point it has to be thrown away and actually it’s easier for me to do it than my children once I’m dead.

My friend thought I’d lost the plot when I told her everything had gone. Aibu? I just think it’s stuff. It’s all pointless really.

Done this recently with all my stuff. I have less crap to try and put away. More space , less cleaning of ornaments and stuff like that. Started in the kitchen and made my way room to room. I've kept certain things and I asked the kids if they wanted any of it before I chucked it. They have their own boxes now full of birth cards , first shoes etc

I love that you've done this!

my mum isn't in great health, nearly 80. still has ALL of our childhood stuff, to the point that it's going to be a nightmare to get rid of it.

fine, she's got the space and she wants it, but sometimes I think "I'm sitting here, we've got lots of photos - do we need to keep a felt and glue thing I made when I was 3"?!

I live in a small flat so to some extent I don't have a choice about being ruthless though.

My parents are hoarders, they live in a huge house and all the rooms are full of junk. I grew up with the same tendencies but over the years for various reasons most my stuff has gone and it feels so much better. Found ourselves homeless last year and that was the final straw for getting rid of junk. We now live in a tiny house and don't have room to hoard - although my tendencies are still there . Fortunately partner is the opposite and isn't remotely sentimental.

Also as a pp said, I've not appreciated my mum trying to palm stuff such as old school books, baby books etc on to me over the years. I don't care! I told her to bin it all, no idea if she did or not

Fine and healthy IMO. I have one largish box for each to keep selected bits of art, school reports etc. Surely no-one needs more than a box of this kind of stuff?

What do you mean redate the Christmas card? Christmas cards don’t tend to have dates on do they?
I have never bought mum/dad/son/daughter cards. Don’t see the point. I only send cards to elderly relatives who we don’t see very often and will appreciate them.

Oh and my craft obsessed 4 year old does about 6 pieces of artwork a day, no way I’m keeping it all

I love a good clearout. I keep my DDs best bits of art but she does about 12 pictures and week and loves junk modelling. If I kept everything I’d be buried in paper after a month.
My DH’s uncle died recently and it took months to sort his house out it’s prompted my FIL to have a look at his own house and majorly declutter so we don’t have to go through the same when he dies.

Those who "couldn't get rid of their child's artwork" don't have my pair who can bring home 6 "precious drawings" a day from school. They're not bothered about them when they've done them, they just enjoy drawing.

I don't keep lots and lots of stuff anymore - I've got scan photos digitised (I probably have the originals somewhere but I don't get emotional about them - I've got the original product of the scan usually swinging off the sofa). Cards I always feel guilty recycling but need to - we have child's birthday > mother's day > child's birthday in under a fortnight in this house so we'd be overwhelmed fairly easily. The kids usually claim the cards to write messages in for each other and reuse that way.

If you live in a house where storage space is limited you have to live within those limits.

I agree with others that there is a balance and this would probably vary from person to person. I also think that most people would distinguish between parting with practical items that are no longer needed e.g. baby equipment, clothing etc and parting with sentimental things that couldn't be replaced and give the owner great joy. I guess the issue is where we draw the line as some people do attach sentimental value to lots and lots of things which can lead to hoarding whilst others are keen to get rid of things that future generations might really want.

A good example is keeping old greetings cards. Most people would probably agree that keeping every single card that one has received over their lifetime would be excessive, however I think keeping a few carefully curated cards that mark significant milestones, contain important messages or are from specific people may well be worthwhile. At the end of the day if you go on to inherit the collection you can always dispose of the cards you don't want to keep but there is no way to magic back cards that have long since been binned.

As I get older I am becoming more & more inclined to get rid of stuff.

There is a saying (Buddhist I think):

"That which I possess, possesses me"

I take photos of the children's artwork so I can look at them easily without having to plough through lots of paper.

I also take photos of their work so that you can see how their handwriting used to look and what stories they wrote. I also video some stuff too.

So instead of it being all packed away in the loft, I can look at it on the computer. It is remotely stored so even if the house were to burn to the ground I would still have them.

I totally get decluttering and having a huge clearout. My children are now both at secondary school so lots of toys have been given to charity.

Christmas cards wise we only send a couple (elderly relatives) because we donate the money instead to feed people.

There is a great card that says "I bought this folded piece of card for your birthday" because that is all it is, a folded piece of card. I would much rather see that person and spend time with them than send a card.

Well done!!! I am trying to do the same. My parents gave me a lot of stuff they had kept, and except my senior school reports, everything else went in the bin. Scan important stuff. Bin the rest.

I am meant to be decluttering today but am instead procrastinating so this thread is just what I needed.

A while back I started the decluttering process. I read a book called Clutterbusting and found it really helpful. I got rid of things I was attached to for no good reason, things I didn’t use anymore but felt guilty about recycling or donating and all the ‘stuff’ like catalogues and leaflets that just seem to accumulate everywhere.

Somewhere I gave up. I have depression and anxiety and I have let it overwhelm me again. But I am determined to sort it and never again let it get to the stage where I feel overwhelmed.

I am sentimental, but realise I don’t need to keep everything. I will keep scan photos and ID bands from hospital but I have already chucked the congratulations cards and 1st birthday cards as they are clutter to me. I will keep some of my son’s artwork and writing but not every scrap he ever scribbled on. My mum kept none of our schoolwork and I would love to have some to look back on so I’m not going to be too strict.

By the way, there was a book about this a while ago (the Swedish Death Clean I think) and I think it is a very good principle to clean the clutter so nobody else has to deal with it when we are gone. Of course there will always be things to sort when somebody dies, but it doesn’t have to include 7 years worth of Boden catalogues and takeaway menus.

I did similar after my DM had to suddenly move into residential care. We got house clearers in clear her house (after selecting a few personal items for her). It was a real eye opener to realise that all her stuff was pretty worthless really. A whole lifetime of things, gone.
I came home and jettisoned bags and bags of stuff. I did try and sell some of it, but realised it was worth more to me to actually get rid of it, than the money i could have raised.
A couple of years down the line, i still don't regret it and my buying habits have changed too, i no longer want to fill my house with stuff, that ultimately will be thrown away.

Fucking hell Death Cleaning is now a thing! We have to do that as well for the poor little snowflakes before they can inherit our property and millions. Anything else they would like us to do? I wouldn’t want to inconvenience anyone!

I’ve got rid of christening cards, scan photos, wedding cards, thanks you cards, Mother’s Day cards, baby memory boxes, new baby stuff and momentoes. All gone. Drawings by the kids, photos, hand made stuff from school and nursery.

Are you sure you want to throw all that away!? (I'm a very sentimental person)

I don’t think there are many people who will be inheriting millions! A lot won’t inherit property. I’d rather make it as easy as possible for my children to deal with my stuff after I’m dead! I’m sure they’ll have better things to do than sort through my crap.

CanYouHearThat the point about getting rid is very valid. I have kept hold of stuff for years that I could sell, but I never get around to it. It is so freeing to just let it go and reclaim the space.That is a principle in the book Clutterbusting. I just needed to let go of the guilt of my mum’s voice saying ‘you can’t get rid of that, it’s like new’. The space and peace you gain is worth so much more.

I love going through the carefully pruned collection of stuff that my parents kept from my childhood. I keep all of my photos of our baby digitally and have her scan photos and a few other bits in a memory box the size of a shoe box. I'm all for pruning stuff down but you've taken it a lot further than I would. Even the art stuff - why not just get them to pick a couple of things they've made and want to keep and bin the rest? The scan photos and new baby stuff are about their lives too, not just yours. It's not like they can offer to store it themselves right now.

Reading this has made me feel panicky and I am a bit worried about that. In fact I will have to stop typing - why is that I normally have a lot to say, is it some sort of anxiety issue about keeping stuff? not nice.

I've just had a massive clearout of the attic room and decorated it as well.
What a job, there was a library book from uni that was 28 years overdue, I returned it. Boxes of stuff from Uni, I left in 1991!. Soft toys from childhood, letters from first loves, 50 pairs of socks, 20 pairs of bootcut jeans and loads of shoes and boots.
It was a hard job getting rid of the stuff,I had to pack the green bin full to bursting and then ask the bin men to take extra. A homeless charity collected a hi fi and other electricals and a charity shop came round and collected, games and cds, clothes etc.
It was that bad up there prior to the declutter that a fireman said it was a fire risk when he came to fit a smoke alarm!.He could hardly get up the stairs as stuff was all piled up high on them.
In future I'm doing it as I go, it was overwhelming!

We moved overseas a few years ago, and could only take what fitted in a 20ft container, anymore and we'd have been charged for a 40ft container. I ruthlessly charity shopped, ebayed and threw out so much stuff that I'd kept 'just in case', and I felt so much better for it. I( now can't stand keeping stuff just in case, and give away/sell/take the tip whatever we don't need, use or love.

That being said, no, I've never binned off memory boxes or scan photos, and I do selectively (i.e only the really good stuff) keep the kid's art work. Each child has a plastic storage box with their first babygrow, shoes, new baby cards, first teddy/comforter and all that stuff, then we have two other storage boxes with art work, school reports, sports awards etc in The boxes are all stacked in a cupboard neatly, so don't bother me.

we have a trunk that contains scan photos, special baby reminders, items from memorable holidays etc. as the DCs have got older, they have loved showing friends/DPs. keeping it to one trunk means it is edited.

Just to add, my Mum downsized a year ago, and we all (db, ds and I) helped her clear 35 years worth of memories and 'just in case' stuff. We needed two skips, 4 charity shop runs and so much stuff given to friends it's not even funny. She felt so much better starting afresh with just the things she loved, wanted and treasured around her, and we children honestly aren't mourning the loss of our 6th form history project, or pile of A-Team videos that she'd kept for us 'just in case' !!