To spell my husbands name correctly.

[Burlea]

In the last 5/6 years when my DB and SIL send DH a Birthday card or us a Christmas/Anniversary card, they have spelt his name wrong ( his ends in 2 Ns,they only put 1).
I have told them a number of times and their reply his that one of their friends spells theirs with only one N. We don't live close so only see about once a year but and it's a big but they have know DH for over 40 years.
DH has now sent a birthday card to SIL (1/9/2018) with his name highlighted with bright yellow marker pen yet it is our wedding anniversary today and the card has come with his name spelt wrong. DH hasn't seen this card yet. I think I'll bin it as I don't want anything spoiling our day.
DB is my older brother and I don't want to fall out with him. But I feel as though they are disrespectful to DH.

'DH hasn't seen this card yet. I think I'll bin it as I don't want anything spoiling our day.'

This may 'spoil your day'

Wow

They are being unbelievabley rude. It’s really not difficult to spell someone’s name correctly, especially after 40 years

I would definitely be spelling their names incorrectly in future.

Grow up - really. life's too short. It does not matter - at all. Really, no-one cares how you spell your name

Seriously? Just because it wouldn't bother you doesn't mean that it doesn't matter and it is clearly upsetting to the OP's DH as she knows the passive aggressive nature of the misspelt card would upset him. I think it is incredibly rude to say no one cares how he spells his name. I's his name for fucks sake, he's not asking someone to remember his childhood pen pals name from 30 years ago, his names important. If you truly think it is not important surely we should all be called Jane and John and be done with it.

Pathetic

Not as pathetic as the ones spelling his name incorrectly in the first place.

@legocardsagain, is his real name Rodney? ;)

Is your DH
Glenn Medeiros?

It shouldn't ruin your OH's day but I do think it is very rude and disrespectful.

My name can be spelt 2 ways so if someone doesn't know me very well I am ok with them spelling it the wrong way. If someone does know me though it annoys me.

My neighbour spelt my name wrong for 12 years! She had cards from us so could see how I spell it. We have moved now.

If I am not totally sure how to spell a name I try and find out or just ask them.

I have a common name that can be spelled a couple of ways, it gets spelled wrong a lot and it doesn't bother me. I also spell my oldest friend's name wrong EVERY DAMN TIME. I know i always get it wrong, i think about it really harf, try my best to remember what i did last time and then spell it wrong. I have the wrong sort of brain for spelling people's names i think and I'm not being petty or rude, just rubbish.
Luckily the way i spell her name definitely won't ruin her day because she's not that highly strung. If it's really going to bother him I'd hide it, whether they mean to cause offence (and if they do they're playing the long game!) or not it's not worth upsetting him over

I hate it when people spell my name incorrectly.

Some people are just thoughtless. Best approach is to gradually mispell their names to something unpleasant. When they complain, just say 'I thought you weren't bothered about how names are spelled'.

DH hasn't seen this card yet. I think I'll bin it as I don't want anything spoiling our day'

Bizarre that this could spoil someone's whole day.

eniledam I had that same issue at work. My name can be spelled two ways, a difference of one letter.

This bloke I worked with would always spell it with the extra letter in it, despite it being right there in my signature. So I started to add an extra letter to his name. He replied after the third email with "by the way, it's Simon with one 'm', not two" with a very PA smiley face. I replied, "yes I know, but you started it." with an equally PA smiley.
He got my name right after that.

Then from now on every time you send them a card spell both their names with an N on the end ie; KateN or DaveN

Members of the extra N family. That's the kind of petty I like!

People misspell my name all the time, I really don't care, I never bother to correct them. But someone corrected me on the spelling of their name once and I never forgot it from then on. We're all different. If it bothers him, it should be taken seriously.

I'm with you op. Why bother making the effort to send a card if you can't be bothered to get the name right.
I'd spell all their names incorrectly too. And then maybe their address. Keep adding one more incorrect letter each time until the cards stop getting delivered because the post office can't work out what it's supposed to be.

Spell their names wrong from now on, if they moan say one of your friends spells it that way. They'll learn.

I'm betting that they know another person with the same name spelled the other way, and they have been sending him cards with the wrong spelling for 40 years as well

Lol at Jame's - that's just nuts

My Dad spelled my name incorrectly on my birth certificate when he went to register me. We didn't realise until I was about 7 (as I always used a short version anyway) but we were looking at my birth cert for some reason and my Mum said OMG he's spelled your name with an e instead of an a, you'll have to start spelling it with an e now.
I've also got a middle name that no one can pronounce correctly.
It is annoying when you;ve consistantly corrected them, but I don't think it's worth causing a rift over, it probably isn't deliberate.

i've got a friend called Clair and I always have to check in my address book - where I have it written correctly because I checked with her - whether it is Clair, Claire, or Clare. And part of the problem is that I know several Claires but she is the only one I can't remember - I have no idea why.

My granny spells my name wrong constantly...

This does sound rather thoughtless and annoying though, especially knowing him for so long!

I'd spell their names wrong too, but then I'm childish and would find it amusing to spell easy likes like Sue = Soo, and Mike = Myke

return card to them in an envelope marked no one of x name at this address..bit rude but might get your point across or no more cards ever!!

Do we think this is anything to do with general literacy levels? I struggle to think of anyone I know who is super literate who would do this- tends to be people who are not so comfortable with written communications?

My aunt spells my name wrong, every birthday and Xmas for 38 years. I always spell it correctly in cards I give her.

It doesn't bother me at all, I am of the "its the thought that counts" club.

Would it really spoil your anniversary if he saw the card OP?

I have been married for 22 years and my dad and brother still spell my surname wrong. It is crass and careless.

My SIL does it to me and my son.

I find it hugely rude but I would never say anything to her face.

DP's extended family spell his first name differently, everyone else gets his surname wrong and a lot of the time it's both. I'd like to say he's chilled about it but he's not he mentions it every time he get a card.
As other people have said it's not difficult to check especially if replying to an email and it's right there!

Yanbu. Last birthday, dsis spelled dh's first name, surname, road name and town wrong. There was an error on every line of the envelope.