Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Strangers asking for money.

119 replies

ALongHardWinter · 10/09/2018 18:29

Is it just me who's experienced this? There seems to be an epidemic of people approaching me in the street,while I'm waiting at a bus stop and even actually on a bus,either asking me directly for money,or spinning me a convoluted story about they've lost their wallet/been mugged. In the high street of the nearest town to where I live there has always been the odd homeless person sitting outside a shop and asking for any spare change.
But this is on a different level. Yesterday evening,I kid you not,I had 4 different people approach me on the space of an hour while I was making my way home from the town. Requests varied from 'Can you 'lend' me a fiver?' (Yeah right,like I'm ever going to get it back!) to 'Can you give a few quid to buy some food'. I (politely) said no to all of them as I am really not in a position to be handing out money to total strangers. But by the time the fourth person approached me,I was like WTAF?! I can guarantee that barely a day goes by when I'm out and about when I don't get at least one person asking me for money. Is it the area I live in? (West London) or is it because of benefit cuts and people are feeling the pinch?

OP posts:
Justanotheruser01 · 10/09/2018 18:31

We have them in my city too and from people who get very nasty when refused.

NewYearNewMe18 · 10/09/2018 18:31

All the time.

Depends if someone genuinely looks hungry or whether they want cigs/booze/drugs. You can usually tell

PawneeParksDept · 10/09/2018 18:34

I haven't noticed this much where I now live but certainly did when I lived in cities.

My favourite was :

"Have you got 20p for bus fare love? Actually I don't know why I'm lying to you its for a drink"

At least he was honest, tragically so

Can't remember if I gave it to him or not

Byebyebye · 10/09/2018 18:34

I work in Leeds City Centre and there are loads of beggars. You can’t sit outside anywhere without being harassed at least 5 times over the space of a coffee.

Note I say beggar not homeless, there is a difference.

Shinesweetfreedom · 10/09/2018 18:37

ByeBye What is the difference.

Sparklesocks · 10/09/2018 18:38

I would say it’s quite common in busy towns and cities now. Some are legit, some are addicts with less support from the squeezed social services, some are just trying their luck.

JenBarber · 10/09/2018 18:41

Grabby culture.

I don't see how they're any different to chuggers, tbh.

Everyone feels entitled to other people's cash.

Petalflowers · 10/09/2018 18:43

imhad this recently by a group of young teenagers. They wamt d to,get to a village a couple,of miles away. I didn’t give them anything, and it can’t of being urgent as they were still hanging around a few hours later.

Oddcat · 10/09/2018 18:44

I would say the majority of them are addicts , sadly.

ThreeAnkleBiters · 10/09/2018 18:44

I've had a few of the "my wife is in labour and my dog is at the vet and I've just been mugged" He was so convincing I did feel sorry for him and a bit guilty for not giving him anything. I felt even more sorry for him the next week when apparently his wife was still in labour and dog still at the vet and he'd just been mugged AGAIN! Poor bloke, what are the chances!

AsAProfessionalFekko · 10/09/2018 18:46

Very common near my work.

There are gangs who try out different 'approaches'. At the moment there are an awful lot of 'ex servicemen' (there is one who I know is sadly genuine) and people wanting £14 for the night in a hostel.

There are also the 'wailers' who scream and cry like banshees (but I've seen the regulars saunter up to their spot, sit down, arrange themselves, compose then 'waaaaaaaaaa - aaaaaaaaa!! Eeeeeeeeee!' for a while then stop for a drink.)

Thank God the summer visitors with the little kids and babies are coming to the end of the season. I really have to see little girls going up to people in the street with their hands out.

The fake Big Issue sellers make me 😡

50Running50 · 10/09/2018 18:47

Money for their next fix? Not a bloody chance!!

Food/drink then I'd buy them something they wanted

Flairhead · 10/09/2018 18:49

When I was a student I had a woman with a child stop me and tell me how her family was about to lose their home unless they could come up with £500. I just said I couldn't help and walked away. Like anyone would give £500 to some random they met in the street!

CosmicCanary · 10/09/2018 18:51

Bye I also work in Leeds and experience this every lunch time by multiple pleople.
The same ones asking me for cash at lunch are the same ones spiced out of their minds I pass at 8am on the way to my work.

AsAProfessionalFekko · 10/09/2018 18:54

Oh I forgot the gang of wee Irish lads who were recently collecting for their local boxing club (very dubious) and the man who approaches you waving a piece of paper folded over with signatures for a petition for a deaf charity. If you sign it, he flips it over with the rest of the form which is actally a donation sheet and he jabs furiously at the list of '£5' and '£10' donations noted down and puts his hand out for money. If you refuse he uses some signs that I don't recognise (I know a little BSL).

Oh oh and the women who dress like tourists (often with a map) and say something softly to you as you go by - if you stop they whisper it again - by that time you are hooked, then they tell you how they are list and need money.

Give me the Christian woman who marches up and down the street yelling about Jesus with her maraccas. Fat betrwr than the man with the sign telling us all the the world will end sometime this December.

Original poster
ALongHardWinter · 10/09/2018 18:59

Jeez! I didn't realise it was so common!
Byebebye. I Know what you mean about beggars and genuinely homeless people. There are quite a few of what is known as 'professional beggars' in my local town,so I've grown wise to them.

ThreeAnkleBiters - I've had similar to this. A bloke approached me as I came out of a shop saying that he'd been mugged and had his phone a wallet stolen,he was miles from home and could I give him 10 quid? Er no. The following week,he approached me in a different location,spinning the same story! I said to him he should remember who he's already tried to con.

OP posts:
9amtrain · 10/09/2018 19:00

I think everyone has experienced this.

I experience it a lot.

I don't even look like I have much money myself! :S (which I don't)

MsOliphant · 10/09/2018 19:01

Every night on the tube.

A group of them play 'Hit the Road Jack' horrendously on some random instruments. Then they shove a dog-eared paper cup in your face for the money.

Being trapped in a carriage on the commute home after a long day when they start up really, really fucks me off.

Also can't go to my local co-op without the same guy every single time saying 'got a pound?' He doesn't bother to concoct anything. Just demands his pound.

Oh and the guy outside High st Ken tube that wails and moans that it's his birthday. It's been his birthday five times this month.

sprinklesandsauce · 10/09/2018 19:02

I had this on a recent short break, I just politely said No each time I was asked for money. One said said, now worries love, and went on to the pub and asked people sat outside. Two woman had a go at him, then two other women had a go at them and it descended into a shouting match between the women while the beggar walked off. All very interesting to watch!

I have bought beggars food/coffee in the early hours after I have had a night out, but never money.

Oddcat · 10/09/2018 19:03

My friends DD is an addict and walks about with an empty petrol can asking for money , saying she's run out of petrol and needs to pick her kids up .

Maelstrop · 10/09/2018 19:04

Got asked for a weirdly precise 36p one day. I didn’t bother responding. So odd.

Kazzyhoward · 10/09/2018 19:05

There's a couple who make a living out of it in my town. Both smartly dressed, it's always the same, they're very pleasant, friendly and well spoken, always ask for 80p for their bus fare home as they've "lost their wallet". Most locals are wise to them now as I think everyone will have been asked - I've been asked several times by both of them now. They're not homeless - it's their "job"!

Roselind · 10/09/2018 19:06

My teenage daughter fell for this shortly after starting 6th form college - lady asked her for the train fare home so she gave her what money she had. She subsequently started to see this woman on a pretty regular basis giving the same spiel. On one occasion she saw her arguing with a guy. I felt it was a good life lesson to understand that people who come up to you to ask for money are sadly almost certainly spinning a yarn.
I am happy to give to homeless who sit on the streets and just are what they are. But never to the ones who are making up stories.

Aquamarine1029 · 10/09/2018 19:07

Happens to me very frequently. I give a firm NO and just keep on walking, not stopping for even an instant.

Floozymum · 10/09/2018 19:16

I'm also in West London and you are right, walking through town I regularly get asked for money. I feel like 90% of the time they are 'fake' and usually wearing nice trainers and faking a limp, one of them even had a Louis Vuitton bag the other day, obviously fake but still!

It upsets me as there are genuine homeless people in the area that would never ask for anything and they are surely getting overlooked.

Swipe left for the next trending thread