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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Any cringe-worthy DC moments?

92 replies

l0stmummy · 07/09/2018 12:52

Just that really?

Yesterday we went to visit SIL who lives by the sea. We all went to the arcades. We were all having a lovely time and DD was enjoying all the lights and music. As DH was playing on one of the machines, somebody came and started playing on the one next to us. I was stood between the two machines with DD in my arms looking towards the other person. Out of nowhere she projectile vomited cauliflower cheese all over the man and his machine. Safe to say after apologising a million times and paying him to get his clothes cleaned, we sped out of there!

Honestly need to know it's not just me.😂😂

OP posts:

silvercuckoo · 07/09/2018 15:37

To an elderly lady on the bus: "Hello, I am name. You look like your bladder is full, are you sure you don't need a wee?".
To a doctor (before a physical exam): "Did you wash your hands? No, do it NOW please, so I can see it".
To his key person in the nursery (a lovely lady in her early 20s): "You are pretty old, of course, but I still decided to marry you".

DemocracyDiesInDarkness · 07/09/2018 15:38

DS will literally say any words in his head, in case he lets a silence fall.

When he was 3: In Debenhams, we walked towards a woman who was maybe 4 feet tall. He cried out, totally delighted 'Awwww, there's a little lady'

When he was 5: We walked a man wearing an eye-patch. Mummy, I didn't know we had a pirate living round here'

ALL AT THE LOUDEST VOLUME IMAGINABLE. I do try to teach him, I really do

TheCakeCrusader · 07/09/2018 15:49

There used to be some photos hung on the wall in the reception area at our doctor’s surgery ( pictures of surgery GPs, nurses and reception staff. One of my dc ( who was only around 3 years old at the time turned around to me and pointed at one of the GP’s who was in the picture and loudly said ‘ mummy, that man looks just like Humpty Dumpty’ followed by his twin also loudly exclaiming, ‘ yes mummy, it’s Humpty Dumpty!’

I could see other waiting patients chuckling in the background but I was mortified!

Saying that, the doctor did have a rather large, bald egg shaped head so I could see why the boys might have thought this, but still quite embarrassing at the time! 😬😳

EthelThePiratesDaughter · 07/09/2018 16:03

@sockunicorn That story is so cute, did your DD and the little girl end up being friends.

These race-related ones make me go a bit .

Don't have any kids yet but our best friends include some black/Asian people so hopefully our future kids will never need it to be explained to them that some people have different coloured skin.

Hyperbolesoul · 07/09/2018 16:27

Queuing in Oasis, 2003 ish, my then 3yo dd with speech delay announced, word perfect and crystal clear "you have a big bum, my mummy has a big bum" to the lady in front of us.
Said lady was stony faced. I was mortified- and dd looked so proud of her observation.

jenthelibrarian · 07/09/2018 16:33

We used to pass the town cemetery on the way to playgroup, and I thought I'd been very open and matter-of-fact about how this place was not a park, and why wouldn't be going to play there.

My daughter subsequently asked, loudly and in the Sainsbury's checkout queue:
"Mummy, if you find a dead person in the road do you have to dig and hole and bury them or burn them up to ashes yourself?"

chipmunkcalling · 07/09/2018 17:01

My son was about 3, we were in the shopping center, he turned to me and said, in his loudest outside voice;
"Mummy, you have the biggest willy ever!"
I had a few funny looks, it was a busy Saturday morning.

amusedbush · 07/09/2018 17:11

See, I'm not a "kid person" and nobody seems to get it when I say I don't like small children because they are unpredictable. I never know what they're going to say and it makes me nervous.

This thread illustrates this perfectly!

Perfect11 · 07/09/2018 17:18

I used to be a childminder. I’d done it for several years and was looking forward to finishing and moving on to my next role. My ds, then 4ish, must have picked up on the fact I was pleased to be stopping.. oh god I’m even cringing writing this.. as I was saying goodbye to the last of my children to leave and her mum. They’d given me chocolates and flowers, all very lovely. I said something along the lines off ‘if you’re passing by one day it’s be lovely to see you, always welcome to stop in for a cuppa and a catch up’. My ds says ‘Why mummy? You hate (child’s name)’ I quickly said ‘no I do not!’ He said ‘yes you say it all the time!’ The parent, quite rightly looked furious, her child became upset and no amount of ‘I’ve never said that’ could improve the situation. I was devastated, utterly. I’d never even said I’d disliked the child!! She was a sweetie. But he’d obviously taken my delight to be stopping childminding as a dislike for the children I cared for I’ve never wished the world to swallow me up as much as I did at that moment.

avocadosrus · 07/09/2018 17:19

When my DD was about 3 I took her swimming and there was a black man with his 2 children she shouted at the top of her voice "mummy look at the chocolate man and his chocolate babies" I wanted to die

EggbertHeartsTina · 07/09/2018 17:19

My almost three year old:
"She's got big arms" referring to a lady we were walking past, definitely in her earshot.

When he was getting impatient at a checkout I said "wait until the lady has finished" and he responded with "that's not a lady".

Cycling past a lady with grey hair who was certainly not old "look at that old lady running!"

This was all in the same week, I was mortified.

Stompythedinosaur · 07/09/2018 17:20

My most embarrassing moment ever is: we had been to Kidzania, where the dc had been being police officers doing at activity where they had to track down a criminal and arrest him (the criminal was played by a staff member and was wearing a distinctive hat to help the kids find him). Later that day on the tube 5yo dd2 spots a man wearing a similar hat and loudly announces "That man looks like a criminal". This was all the more embarrassing as he was black and I can only assume that everyone present thought we were hugely racist.

Camomila · 07/09/2018 17:29

@EthelThePiratesDaughter DC of all ethicities can end up asking funny/embarrasing questions about race.
Friends young DD (half Filipina) asked DH if he was black (he's not he's Filipino) because he had a shaved head...boring example, but DC can get confused even in a multicultural environment.

DS learnt about dentists at nursery, then told us we had yellow teeth!

Sleephead1 · 07/09/2018 17:49

Ive got a few we took my little boy swimming and when my husband got changed he shouted so loudly oooo you've got a big Willy than just kept repeating it getting louder. I took him into the public toilet when I was on my period and got a tampon out in a green packet he started saying what are you doing with that green bean ? have you put the green bean in the toilet , what have you done wuth the green bean mammy ive no idea what people must have thought I was doing. He's also dine the thing where I say oh the lady will serve us now and he said that's not a lady it's a man right in front of her

Murine · 07/09/2018 18:05

“Ohhh look it’s Sleeping Beauty!” upon spotting a relic of an entire dead saint in an Italian cathedral despite my best attempts to block her view.
Telling her reception teacher all about the time the dog pissed on our bed and the very rude words mummy said when she saw it.

MelanieLampshade · 07/09/2018 18:09

I was eating in a sushi restaurant with my son who was then about 5 or 6.

Sandi Toksvig was at the next table and very sweetly complimented DS on his lovely manners. I said to him "Sandi [then looked at her to confirm she was who I thought she was and she nodded] says you have been behaving really nicely" and he sort of looked a bit nonplussed and said "thanks" quietly.

I was all basking in great-parenting-noticed-by-a-famous-I-rate feeling when...

...as she walked away he bellowed "WHAT DID YOU SAY HIS NAME WAS?".

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 07/09/2018 20:18

I can’t stop laughing at your post, SockUnicorn 😀😀😀
Your dd sounds fabulous!

bitchwitch · 07/09/2018 20:55

not dc,baby brother(age 3)grew up in a fairly rural area,not very diverse.
standing in line in grocery store and a black elderly gentleman was behind us.boy looked at man and said "chocolate".i was 12 and mortified.the man was wonderful about it and after i had apologized he explained to brother that god made people in all sorts of colors to reflect the colors in nature.bro asked to touch him.the man was so gracious and sweet about the whole thing.when i thanked him he winked and said "got to start them out young if things are gonna change".this was 4 decades ago and i remember it like it was yesterday.

signandsingcarols · 07/09/2018 20:57

my ds (who was 7 at the time and has autism) stood in the supermarket pointed at the lady in the next queue and said really loudly. "SHE IS A MUSLIM, SHE IS WEARING A HIJAB!" I did a kind of arkward smile and said "yes she is, isn't it interesting that everyone is different, . He had been learning about different cultures at school and I was chuffed he had made the connection especially as he is usually oblivious.... but I could have done without the pointing and shouting

greencatbluecat · 07/09/2018 21:11

DD, aged a few months, decided the best place to do a 4-day poo was in her
Swimming lesson. The swimming nappy just wasn't up there the job.I got out with her and there was a trail of pool dripping down onto the floor all the way along the poolside, past the showers and up to the toilets.

While I was getting out, the instructor was telling all the toddlers waiting at the side of the pool that their swimming was cancelled. Some of them started crying. The pool was shut for the rest of the day for cleaning.

Menolly · 07/09/2018 21:18

Telling her reception teacher all about the time the dog pissed on our bed and the very rude words mummy said when she saw it.
Stories like this are one of the things I love about working in reception

DD then aged 5 was asked what things mummy likes (while making mothers day cards) and said tampons and wine as 'that's what she always asks Daddy to buy from the shop'

Not my DC but I took my 5 youngest siblings out for the day when I was 19, siblings were between 3 and 9 and a woman who works in the little shop we were in tutted about it being such a shame babies having babies etc. so I started to explain they actually weren't mine and the 9 year old looked at me with huge eyes and said 'how could you say such a thing?' and I was like 'well coz i'm not your mum' and she threw herself on the floor and with great gasping fake sobs demanded to know why I was ashamed of her and kept the sobbing going til I left the shop. They live in a small town, there are still rumours that they are actually my kids.

DoJo · 07/09/2018 21:18

My son once said, while about a meter away from a lady getting out of the pool 'Why's that man weeing in the pool?' I explained that it wasn't a man, it was a lady and it was just the water running off her as she got out. He went quiet for a second, then just as I had started to relax said 'But she has got a penis though, hasn't she Mummy?' and I tried to drown myself as she glared at me.

Mummymummums · 07/09/2018 21:18

DD aged around 5 at the time was invited to the party of a girl in her class - I'll call her Ruby. She went along, played for two hours, and sat next to Ruby the birthday girl at the party tea after.
As we were getting ready to leave I said "Go and say goodbye to Ruby". In her loudest voice right next to Ruby's mother she said "Which one's Ruby?"

didyouseetheflaresinthesky · 07/09/2018 21:25

When I was little I chatted to a man on the bus and told him he was very black, much blacker than my friend Moh. My mum was

badmgr · 07/09/2018 21:25

5yo child in a shop queue whispering to me. I couldn’t hear so asked them to repeat.
Repeated again but still couldn’t hear.
In a loud frustrated voice “I WAS TRYING TO TELL YOU THAT THE LADY IN FRONT OF US HAS A REALLY SMALL HEAD!!!”

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