AIBU to have the impression that I've only been invited to this Wedding reception as an afterthought just to 'make the numbers up'?

[Figbiscuitsandtea]

My friends dd contacted me the other day and asked for my address as she wanted to send me an invite to her Wedding.
I thanked her, gave her my address and she then text back to say that the invite is only for the evening reception, but because there's apparently been a 'cock up' with the invites she warned I might accidentally receive an invitation to the whole day.
I was confused by this as my invite obviously hadn't been sent yet, so how could I be sent the wrong one?
Anyway, the invitation came and sure enough it is for the whole day and night. Complete with a separate lovely card asking for money talking about how they don't really need presents etc but would love to save for that special something.

I didn't at first think much of it, until I noticed that the invitation should've been replied to over four weeks ago!

I'm now left wondering if my friends dd has already used up the evening invites, realised some people have probably declined their invite, and so she's now decided to invite me (and probably others) in order to make the numbers up?

This could be why I've received an out of date and incorrect invitation, that's all she might have had left!

AIBU to not now want to go? . For what its worth, the reception is also fifty miles away and I would have to drive so I can't even have a drink so I'm really not sure whether to bother going when I feel like I'm an afterthought .

I was once in that exact situation - I got an invite but the RSVP date was already long in the past. It would have required a considerable journey, a hotel stay, new outfit etc. I assumed I was "filler" and declined, using the excuse that there wasn't sufficient notice to arrange the time off. I also bought them an oven glove off their wedding list. Well, they must have wanted it if they listed it...

Leftrightcentre

It probably does sound 'bizarre' but I don't want to just give a lame excuse to my friend for not going.

GraceMarks
You can see where I'm coming from!

figbiscuits yeah, I think my situation was a bit different because the bride was a friend I'd been growing apart from and it would have involved a lot of expense and hassle for me to go. But still, if it had been a case of "oh, we absolutely MUST have Aunty Fig at our wedding!" you would have got an invitation before now.

If you think it might be fun to go, then you should, but if not, I don't think you'd be unreasonable to make your excuses.

OP, despite your protestations, I think the real reason you don't want to go is feeling miffed that you were invited at the last moment because you're not an A list guest.

On the plus side, if you weren't an A list guest, it also makes it easier to decline. Just reply quickly to say that you're flattered to be invited, but it's a long way to travel, so you won't be joining them but will think of them on the day.

Say no if you don't want to go. It is the night do and a long way.

Don't be narked about being a B list though. It might not have been easy for them to whittle the guests they wanted to a final A list due to venue numbers.

I'm not 'narked' that I'm not on the A list as no doubt there's loads of people to invite, but yes I would make more of an effort to go if I was invited earlier (even just to the reception)

Although, if it was local then I'd definitely just go anyway

.

Nothing to add really, just impressed you came back to add the missing full stop.

She's a cheeky fecker. Send a decline card, no need to put a reason, and keep your purse firmly closed. If she gets in touch just say you've thought about it and it's too far to go for just an evening.

I haven’t read the whole thread but quite often there is a list of people you feel you have to invite (even if you don’t want to) and you hope they decline so you can invite those you really want there. My friends married recently and through me they became close to my parents who were invited to the night do. They said from the outset that if anyone dropped out of the day my parents were first reserve. It was financial constraints and obligation to family that meant my parents weren’t invited in the day. They were anything but an afterthought.

Nothing to add really, just impressed you came back to add the missing full stop
Are you usually this bitchy Casanova?. If you had 'nothing to add' then why waste your time adding that sarcy comment? .. So what if I wanted to bump to get other people's perspective? . It's none of your business.
Thank you Woolly