Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Toddler shitting in the park!

79 replies

Mamawingingit1234 · 06/09/2018 12:36

Husband and I have just had words (low, snarky, passive aggressive words) because I said to take the toddler to the Dentist literally across from the car and ask to use the loo but he was adamant he was taking her to the park approx 5min away, across a set of traffic lights to squat hopefully behind a bush and poo!

We’d got timings wrong and the baby woke early from a nap with a poonami and crying for milk. I was mid clean up with the baby on the passengers seat when toddler (who just been to the loo not 5 mins ago to pee) cried for a poo!

Convo went like this:
M: take her to the dentist just there
H: no I’ll just take her to the park
M: the dentist is just there!!! Don’t make her poo in the park
H: she won’t mind! Does the detist even have toilets?
M: I don’t know but probably just go
H: don’t ask me if I want to do something if you’re really telling me! no I’ll take her to the park
H: you do it then, go on. I’ll do this (finish baby’s nappy)
me gives exasperated look
M: sure and you can feed him too (baby is bf)
H: don’t roll your eyes at me
Then he walks of muttering to our toddler!!!

Who’s being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Gersemi · 06/09/2018 13:22

Your husband is utterly disgusting and totally unreasonable to even consider letting a child shit on the floor. Jesus.

Why? He picked it up. It's no worse than letting a dog shit and picking up the results afterwards.

Gersemi · 06/09/2018 13:23

I love your DH's question about whether the dentist had toilets. Does he imagine they work all day with their legs crossed?

Aeroflotgirl · 06/09/2018 13:24

Oh god Soggidge that is grim, there were toilets near, and she encouraged her toddler to do that in front of everyone Shock. After dd incident in the park, I carried a Pottete with me for 6 months but it never happened again, it was a one off bad stomach incident.

With dogs its different, you know on the walk they will probably poo, so carry around all the relevant paraphanalia to clean it up. With a child who has a sudden attack of a bad stomach when not near a loo, you don't know.

lottiegarbanzo · 06/09/2018 13:25

Is he a big baby of the fragile-ego-has-to-pretend-to-know-everything-and-act-authoritiatively-at-all-times type, who will not ask for help, or for directions? So, could not bear to ask a favour of the dental receptionist, especially if the answer might be no?

Or actually shy or socially awkward, so would avoid asking a question of the receptionist - and go absurdly out of his way to avoid doing so - for this reason?

SchadenfreudePersonified · 06/09/2018 13:25

Runners often comment about needing a pop and going in a busy and most of them don't clear it up.

That is DISGUSTING - much worse than dog poo - and as PP has said, if we don't clear up after our dogs, there's hell to pay.

mikado1 · 06/09/2018 13:27

Gross. A friend's au pair left her toddler do that at a picnic last year, and left it there ! As a long as a child hasn't far to go it's always worth bringing them to an actual toilet do they learn to hang on.

DieAntword · 06/09/2018 13:32

Deary me the world of mumsnet. Has my toddler shit in a park? Yes, a couple of times. Do I envisage it happening again when I potty train dc2? Yes most likely. Pick it up in a bag, no different to a dog.

A couple of times? Like not one mortified time when there was literally no other option? You let your kid squat and shit on the floor like someone from a country without public toilets? Surely if they can’t hold on long enough to wait for a toilet you should be carrying a potty around?

Well I know who to blame if my kid gets worms...

morningtoncrescent62 · 06/09/2018 13:34

The kid started doing a wee which was bad enough but then 'upgraded' and curled out a massive shit in front of all the diners. Mum shouted "oh WELL DONE darling! A poo poo!" and then put a leaf over it and walked off.

GrinGrinGrinGrinGrin

Sorry, I'm sure it was disgusting to witness, but this made me laugh out loud.

Why on earth would anyone have a problem with taking a toddler to a dentist's to use the toilet? Of course they would have one - if not for patients, then for staff, and I can't believe they would bat an eyelid about being asked if a small child could use it quite irrespective of whether it's your dentist or not. Park/behind bush is an absolute last resort when you have a desperate toddler and no other possibilities.

Raver84 · 06/09/2018 13:34

I find the thought of allowing a child to shit in a bush vile actually and this has never happened to me with 4 children. They can usually wait until a public toilet or say the dentist in this instance. Or you take a potty. It's gross.

LittleLionMansMummy · 06/09/2018 13:37

Your dh wbu, much easier all round to have taken her to the dentists, the park was a weird choice. But he cleared it up, so I really couldn't get too wound up about it.

WizardOfToss · 06/09/2018 13:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hibbledibble · 06/09/2018 13:57

Given a choice, yes your husband should have absolutely gone to a real toilet.

I have been caught out once with a toddler who just lowered her trousers, squatted and pooed in a park. Luckily I had dog poop bags on me and scooped it. It was mortifying

BackinTimeforTea · 06/09/2018 14:00

it does depend on your children - i've never (touch wood) had a need for the dc to have an emergency poo, but it seems a fairly normal thing to happen, if he picked it up I don't really see that it is a huge deal.

GoodbyeSummer · 06/09/2018 14:02

We had a potette travel potty with the liners for exactly this reason.
In fact we still have it despite my children being 6&7 now. They make great sick buckets for both at home and on the go because they're just the right size & shape!

Gileswithachainsaw · 06/09/2018 14:06

The time you spent arguing you could have just gone home .....

Dentist was the best call after that.

Shitting in the park is gross if your kid can't wait a few mins to get home or to a nearby toilet they probably should still be in pull ups.

plumcat · 06/09/2018 14:08

It's just a poo in a park.. better than stinking up the dentist 😂 don't see the problem

FlipnTwist · 06/09/2018 14:13

I am actually with your DH on this one.A shit in a bush picked up an dcorrectly disposed of is fine.How is it worse than a dog shit?
Going into some random business with whom you have no connection and expecting to use their toilet is cheeky-fuckery!

FlipnTwist · 06/09/2018 14:15

Can't believe the number of posters who have never had an alfresco dump.Have you never been to the countryside.What do you do when you are on a long walk?

HoleyCoMoley · 06/09/2018 14:18

She didn't actually poop in the end so it's not an issue, how can you carry a portable potty around all day if you don't drive, do they fold up, I'd take bags, wipes and a nappy pad. POO IN THE PARK, it sounds like a summer music festival.

GoodbyeSummer · 06/09/2018 14:39

@HoleyCoMoley do they fold up the one we have does. It comes in its own little drawstring bag and it either fits into a large changing bag or hangs from the back of the pushchair.

Dollymixture22 · 06/09/2018 14:44

I think if he picked the poo up it’s fine! Funny story to tell her wh n she is older.

RomanyRoots · 06/09/2018 14:47

I wouldn't have been a cf and gone to the dentists, unless I knew they had public toilets, ours certainly doesn't.
Nothing wrong with going behind a bush if you clean up, it's what you do with toddlers and dogs.
I used to hold mine over a grid if they were desperate.

DieAntword · 06/09/2018 14:50

I took my sons non portable potty in the bottom of the buggy until I realised he can hold it in longer than I can.

Choccyhobnob · 06/09/2018 15:08

Can't believe everyone getting their knickers in a twist about the poo in the park! I do agree that the dentist was the better option but if there is no other option and they have to go immediately (sometimes they just DO) then the furthest corner of the park, hidden behind a bush and cleaned and bagged up and removed is surely not that big a deal?!

My 2 year old had an attack of the runs in the middle of a remote park in the French countryside this year, nothing I could do but clear it up afterwards. IT HAPPENS!!

lottiegarbanzo · 06/09/2018 16:27

I think alfresco pooing in remote countryside is rather different from a busy city park.

Park-wise, it's one thing if there's no alternative. It's quite another to choose to travel five minutes to poo in one, when there's a dental pratice over the road, where no-one will mind a desparate child using the loo.