AIBU - free school meals application against my wishes.

[GlitterSand]

Two years ago I became eligible to claim free school meals,
I do not need the assistance so declined the offer.
The local council sent me a silly amount of letters about being entitled to claim, I phoned them and asked them to stop, explained that I didn't need to claim and asked them to make a note on my 'file' not to contact me again.
However, within a few months it started again I ignored them until I received a letter that basically said 'you are entitled to claim this so we are going to put in a claim on your behalf'
This annoyed me and I sent them a letter telling them that I do not give them permission to ever make a claim for FSMs on my behalf, that I wanted it marked on my file that I never want a claim for FSMs to be made in my name.
Someone from the council called me and apologised he said he made a note on my file and I would not be contacted again.

My DC has just started secondary school and for the second day in a row, his student account was not charged for the meal he had.
I just called the school and they have told me that his account has not been charged because he is in receipt of FSM, I told her this is a mistake and she is going to look into it and call me back.

I'm currently on hold to the council.

I'm so angry, how dare they put in a claim without my knowledge or permission and against my explicit request not to.
AIBU to be so annoyed?

I'm just posting to vent really, to try to calm down before I speak to anyone, but I'm just so angry that they can go against my wishes and put in a claim for a benefit that I do not want.

no one knows it's credited with FSM money and you are a few quid richer
The office know, the teachers know. That matters, to some people.

Only if their parents don't send them with a packed lunch
Our school provides packed lunches for every FSM child, most of which go to waste as parents don't want their child to be the odd one out.

Actually, governors don’t get told who is eligible, we get told the schools total entitlement for the year, then we have to allocate that for the year

Good to know, thanks. Thanks also to the other poster explaining this.

Parents put their NI Number on the admission form, I enter that on a website and it comes back with “entitled” or “not entitled”. If it comes back as “entitled” we ask the parent to sign a form and that’s it

It shouldn't be automatic knowledge. Free school meals are a wonderful thing but the choice should be there whether you apply or not, same goes for pupil premium. It shouldn't be an automatic assumption that when your child enters education their socioeconomic status follows them. If they're behind, they're behind. If they need FSM they can apply. It just goes back to nanny state.

I can't believe how little posters value their personal information and autonomy. I don't agree with not claiming either but the point is it's not my decision to make or personal info to process. Massively unreasonable to go against your wishes. I'd be livid.

I imagine the ICO would be interested in this

The work they were covering was way below his ability. She said that he had to be included.because the school wouldn't be allowed to run the sessions without including all of the PP children. There were children in those groups who were not PP children but because it was the PP funding that paid for it they had to include the PP children ( whether they needed it or not!)

That's a ridiculous misuse of the scheme, they need to have a think carefully about how they use the funds - there are a myriad of ways that they can use it to help without hindering the education of the more able child.

I suggest you get over yourself and be grateful the school will be getting the additional funding that comes with a free school meal allocation.

@Hidingfrommykids, it’s because the OP was eligible and claimed child tax credit only, not working tax credit. If you get working tax credit as well, you are not eligible for fsm unless your income is less than about £8k a year.

In terms of the pupil premium funding, the school might be OK. Even if the OP gets the fsm stopped, he’s likely to still be entitled to PP under ever 6.

@onetimeposter can you clarify what you mean by accusing me of having an attitude please? Or are you going to pretend you didn’t?

I think it's worse at my son's school because being a grammar school it is very rare to get a child attending who receives PP. I've definitely sensed a patronising attitude towards me and my husband when we have attended meetings or parents evenings. It's not helped by the fact that my son has one of those names that gets called "chavvy" in the baby names topic
Me too-totally obvious is he called Hayden

I now insist that DH wears his smartest suit and I always dress up a bit and try to look expensive rather than go in my SAHM uniform of jeans and a t shirt! I know that's ridiculous but I have found we have been treated with more respect by the school staff since we've done that

Refer to my comments on the ironing shirts thread which received vitriol for suggesting kids are seen as worse when they are scruffy and from a poor background

Thanks for responding namechanger, no housing costs make it a shit tonne easier not to claim. Lots of us would also prefer to stand on our own two feet and be self sufficient like you but it’s not as simple as just deciding to be.

I wasn't suggesting that most people can do what I've done. My point was that benefits should be for those that need them. I don't need them, it would be greedy to take them.

I suggest you get over yourself and be grateful the school will be getting the additional funding that comes with a free school meal allocation
I suggest you examine your views on why it matters that the school will receive the additional funding. Op states her child is not disadvantaged, i.e. academically able and included fully in the school curriculum.
Ergo, the funding will benefit other children, but not hers.
Why should she have to apply for something which only benefits others? Why is she responsible for other childrens' education. Why do her details need putting on a form in order for other parents' children to benefit from that funding?
Do tell.

That's a ridiculous misuse of the scheme

Yet it happens in many, many schools. In my last class, I had MAT pupils on FSM going out for extra support and doing the same work as those children who actually needed the support. I had pupils who would have really seen the benefit of this, but weren't on FSM so didn't get to go.

FSM support groups are completely separate to other support groups by the way, for the poster who said they were the same thing.

That's a ridiculous misuse of the scheme, they need to have a think carefully about how they use the funds - there are a myriad of ways that they can use it to help without hindering the education of the more able child
At my son's grammar school, they use the funding to have 3 monthly meetings to ensure the PP kids aren't falling behind due to their socioeconomic circumstances ie that their achievement is acceptable and they don't embarrass the school

It was the “prefer to stand on my own two feet comment” namechanger. Most of us would. You don’t stand on your own two feet simply because you prefer too. There are other factors that allow you to.

@therealimposter this is just one of the many reasons why I hate my DC's primary school! The Head is a law unto herself. It hasn't been fully inspected for years because it's outstanding. I can't wait for the next full inspection to uncover all the dodgy practices.

I declare my maintenance on my tax return every year as an additional declaration because I want to make sure I'm being crystal clear with HMRC, although I have been told multiple times that it is not counted as 'income' I still choose to add it because I don't want to risk it being overlooked.

So you also ignore advice from qualified professionals?

Putting a superfluous white space note on your tax return about non-taxable income doesn't make you virtuous or superior. If anything, you're wasting precious taxpayer resources by causing HMRC Officers to have to take the time to read the pointless notes you put on your tax return. That's time that could be spent pursuing somebody who's evaded taxes.

If HMRC wanted to know about the maintenance payments people were receiving they would have added a box to the return. They haven't, because they don't want to know about income that isn't taxable and is not remotely in any kind of grey area! Hence why the only way for you to "declare" them is to add a text note.

If you don't want to come off in the way you have, then it would probably be an idea not to make silly statements about declaring non taxable maintenance payments on your tax return in quite such an "of course I declare it every year" way. I have never known anybody do that. It is not necessary.

I really hope nobody else read that and panicked that they were supposed to have been reporting theirs. It won't be "overlooked" because it doesn't need to be looked at in the first place.

Your posts just read like somebody who's outraged anybody else might think of them as "poor" or "on benefits".

No, no response from onetimeposter. True to form.

If

Definition of 'snob'
a person with an exaggerated respect for high social position or wealth who seeks to associate with social superiors and looks down on those regarded as socially inferior
OP isn't looking down on anyone, she just doesn't want to claim FSM.
You claim repeatedly she's a snob. How can you be a person of 'high social position or wealth' when entitled for FSM??

Are food bank recipients 'snobs' if they feel shame meaning they don't access help?

Are disabled people who don't want to put in for DLA because they don't feel they are bad enough, snobs?

No. Snobs are people of a higher status than someone else, who make negative judgements of others. Such as your attitude towards the OP repeatedly calling her a snob, and being snarky that she feels she's too good to claim benefits. She's proud, not a snob.

So you think I’m a snob? just so we’re clear that’s what you’re accusing me of?

Actually no. I just think you're confrontational and keep making snarky points in the hope someone bites. I was making a point that the OP is not by definition a snob even though you have insinuated it more than once.
I have nothing else to say to you.

So if not snobbery what attitude are you accusing me of having? You say OPs embarrassment about claiming FSM is because of attitudes like mine. I’m not following what you mean? What attitude of mine is making OP feel embarrassed?

Yikes, haven’t you got eight million chips on your shoulder....

GlitterSand I am entitled however do not claim too. The same reason as you- I receive money off ds’s dad and so can afford to pay for his meals. If it was any other benefit people would be complaining as to why are you claming when you can afford it and taking money out of the ‘pot’- can’t win!!!!

You’ve given a definition of what a snob is, onetimeposter, then gone on to demonstrate that you haven’t actually understood it yourself?
Read your post back to see what I mean.

My point was that benefits should be for those that need them. I don't need them, it would be greedy to take them.

That’s a completely reasonable point of view. In the OP’s case, it’s somewhat undermined by admiting halfway down the thread she claimed CTC she didn’t really need but felt she deserved because she’s paid lots of tax. Especially since it’s that claim that has made her child eligible for the fsm grant and ever 6 funding.

The LA shouldn’t be claiming without her permission. But the OP doesn’t have a leg to stand on when it comes to arguing from a position of claiming things you don’t need.

OP - Not had the chance to read the whole thread but if you don't want to claim FSM when you speak to council ask them to remove your national insurance number from their records. They won't be able to check your eligibility without it so it will prevent this happening again.
You might need to put it in writing but with new GDPR laws you can withdraw consent for them to use your details for these checks.

I agree with everyone else though in that you are depriving the school of pupil premium if you don't claim. But ultimately it's your choice.