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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder what the point is?

81 replies

Creeper8 · 03/09/2018 22:32

My child has a home visit from the school on wednesday. He is starting in reception. Ive aleady met the teacher and had already had the induction so I cant understand what the home visit is for? I spoke with my friend who said she didnt have one. Is this normal?

OP posts:
OzymandiasFanClub · 03/09/2018 22:37

Is it so your child and the teacher can meet each other? And then they won't be complete strangers to each other on the first day of school. It will help them both get to know each other.

Prusik · 03/09/2018 22:40

As a teacher, I found it useful to meet the child in their own setting. It was good to see them slightly more relaxed and potentially learn something about them. Eg name of cat, favourite teddy, etc. It was also really good to see their behaviour at home. Not in a judgy way but for example, how outgoing or independent or busy they were as a person

Thisimmortalcurl · 03/09/2018 22:41

I think that’s quite nice. Mine didn’t have anything like that. Apart from a glimpse when they went into class following an assembly on first day I had no idea really who was spending lots of time with my children until the first parents interview ..... and for one who was partially deaf which made him lack in confidence a little she had pronounced his uncommon Irish name wrongly throughout the first term!

Original poster
Creeper8 · 03/09/2018 22:51

Theyve already met! He had an induction at the school.

OP posts:
InspectorIkmen · 03/09/2018 22:57

Don't forget to have the gin bottle out and obviously in use. Pack of Woodbines will probably help too. Wear nipple clamps. Have Jeremy Kyle on the telly.

flyingsaucersherbet · 03/09/2018 23:01

Ooh I just asked 2 teachers this the other day! They say it’s because child is more relaxed there, but also it’s useful so they can gauge the child’s background - is there support at home, are they likely to come to school hungry (both teach in disadvantaged areas) what resources do they have access too - books etc.

LusaCole · 03/09/2018 23:02

Normal in my DC's school. The nursery and reception teachers say they find them really useful.

Original poster
Creeper8 · 03/09/2018 23:05

Im gonna cancel it as tbh just seems like a chance to snoop around!

OP posts:
NotTakenUsername · 03/09/2018 23:05

I always see them as a fact finding mission for the teacher.

What sort of ‘background’ the child is coming from.

cmlover · 03/09/2018 23:05

getting more normal, but I don't like them, it's basically to see their up bringing, if there's any red flags.

which is fine by it's self, I have nothing to hide it's just so sly

NotTakenUsername · 03/09/2018 23:06

Ah... but if you cancel then you become “what-have-they-got-to-hide?-family...”

I hate the idea of them.

Original poster
Creeper8 · 03/09/2018 23:10

I think it is to make a judgement, check up type thing. Just dont feel its necessary. Especially since other
people I know with children starting school in september aswell arent having them.

OP posts:
Frazzledkate · 03/09/2018 23:11

I'm a year six teacher so up the other end of school but I went on a couple of home visits in my training years, many moons ago. From what I can remember they were pretty much just a tick boxing exercise that had to be done. Honestly, unless they spot lines of coke on the coffee table, they aren't gonna judge you in the slightest!

I say that tho, but I hate the health visitor coming as I get that I'm being judged feeling!

NotTakenUsername · 03/09/2018 23:12

Honestly, unless they spot lines of coke on the coffee table, they aren't gonna judge you in the slightest!.

I’ve sat in staff rooms and would beg to differ. Your school sounds much nicer and more professional than any I’ve have the misfortune of working in.

NotTakenUsername · 03/09/2018 23:13

Judgement about pot noodles, games consoles, personal hygiene and pets... etc etc etc... Angry

AornisHades · 03/09/2018 23:15

We had one for ds. It's fair to say they got an insight into him. They probably didn't see that at school for a good while.

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/09/2018 23:16

I had one for pre-school. Nice woman, no issues.

But I'd have hated the judgmental arsehole we had in kindergarten to have come to my home.

AliTheMinx · 03/09/2018 23:20

When my son started school, his reception teacher visited him in his nursery instead of a home visit, which I rhought was a great idea!

mishgs · 03/09/2018 23:24

I'm a Nursery teacher and we do home visits. It's just a chance to get know the child before they start & also to speak to the parents about any concerns, questions on a 1:1 basis that can't really be done on a general visit with the rest of the class. Most parents appreciate it and the children talk about it for months later,"Do you remember when you came to my house?". The children love to show us their favourite toys, pets etc and the visit normally lasts for 15 mins.

chitofftheshovel · 03/09/2018 23:35

Nah, its a chance to snoop and start the judgement process and put your child in a box. I would cancel in your shoes.

Original poster
Creeper8 · 03/09/2018 23:41

Is it better to make up an excuse or just say that Im declining the visit?

OP posts:
NotTakenUsername · 03/09/2018 23:44

In all seriousness op. Your child might feel a bit left out if the teacher has been to everyone’s house but theirs.
If you have nothing to hide I’d just get the hoover out and play the game.

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/09/2018 23:50

If you have nothing to hide

I absolutely HATE this. Privacy isn't about hiding things. It's about some things being separate to other things. This phrase is used as an excuse for all kinds of abuses of our rights.

Frankly, it would make more sense (considering which way the trust flows in this relationship) for the parents to do home visits of the teachers. We are handing over the most important person in our lives. Why don't we get to look through underwear draws and check for cocaine?

NotTakenUsername · 03/09/2018 23:52

MrsTerryPratchett I don’t disagree at all. But equally I wouldn’t make a stand over something like this where my child was concerned.

Original poster
Creeper8 · 03/09/2018 23:53

My child honestly wouldnt care.

OP posts:
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