Terminating an unplanned pregnancy

[Nowheretoturn107]

NC for this.

Please don’t flame me for this. I’m not judging anyone for their decisions, I am in absolute bits and have no one to talk to in real life. I’m sorry if this is a sensitive subject for many.

I’ve recently found out I’m pregnant. I have a 9 month old DD. This pregnancy was not planned - we are using contraception and I am BF so my periods haven’t returned yet - and my DH and I are in a mix of shock, despair and confusion over whether to continue the pregnancy. Our DD is an awful sleeper and up all hours, I’m breastfeeding her day and night, she is a fairly high needs baby, I look at her on the monitor as I type this and I’m not ready for her to share me with a sibling yet. She seems to tiny and vulnerable, how could I be so silly to get pregnant when I have such a young baby to care for. How would we cope? Financially we would just about manage with a second but I’d be ruining my career, and potentially my close bond with DD.

We had planned more children in the future, we always said we’d discuss it when our DD turned 2, so AIBU to terminate a pregnancy because it hasn’t come at the right time? Is it U that I want to enjoy my DD on her own for a couple of years before adding to our family? I’m not a bad or selfish person, please don’t think that of me. I’m just desperate for advice. Thank you.

I have seen more than one thread on here along the lines of ‘would you have had children if you knew what it would be like?’ and many many posters said no.

@gamerchick
I am completely pro choice.
I am certainly not trying to guilt trip anyone. I was simply passing on something that someone told me.

I am not being patronising I just can't believe anyone could not love their kids unless they were ill.

@Cornettoninja
I really just wanted to pass on something someone told me.

Of corse it is completely their choice and should do what is best for there family.

Erm because it's not about whether you love your kids or not

Maybe start your own thread if you want to pass on wisdom, you might be surprised at the replies.

@gamerchick
The op asked for advice and I passed on something someone said to me when I was in a similar situation. I'm not trying to pass on wisdom I was trying to help.

He/She will be around the same age as your child and will be buddies.
Hmm IME the smaller the age gap the more they will fight!

Mine are really close in age and don’t fight at all, so far! 5 and 3. I think all siblings have the potential to fight, whatever the age gap.

This decision is completely personal to you. Good luck my darling whatever you decide x