AIBU to be annoyed at my DDs dance performance?

[PrincessWatermelon]

I genuinely don't know if I'm being precious about this.

My 2 DDs (3 and 6) do a dance class on a Sat morning. The lady who runs it is v enthusiastic and runs a number of other classes through the week. Today they had a performance at the local music hall. It was a big deal and everyone was excited. It was the first time a show had been put on.

I knew they were only going to be in one part of it, as they only did one class. And I didn't mind the cost of over £100 once costumes and tickets had been bought.

However, rehearsal was from 9am this morning and the show at 2pm. They came on stage at 4:30 for maximum of 15 mins and the show finished after 6pm. So it was 4 hours long and they'd been there for 5 hours before that.

My AIBU is that they were required to be backstage (downstairs) the whole time except when they were physically on stage. They were in groups in small rooms. They weren't allowed out of the rooms and even had their packed lunch in there. So from 9am-6pm with presumably 15mins of dance in the morning and 15mins of dance in the afternoon. My DD6 especially was upset and a bit distressed by how bored and cooped up she was. They weren't told to bring books or colouring or anything.

Is this normal and AIBU?

Sorry just re read that and I wasn’t clear... every child performing will need either a license or an exemption. DD was exempt in her last show. So in essence all children are included in the council application, just not all children are issued actual licenses.

The show was ridiculously long.

Being backstage all through the rehearsals depends on what the rehearsals are.
Full dress rehearsal - reasonable
Tech rehearsal for lighting and sound cues - reasonable
People just going through their dances and getting some feedback- totally unreasonable.

I'd also expect some flexibility for younger ones still in EYFS range.

Performers staying backstage during a performance is entirely normal. It's not that good for a show if you've got performers nipping front of house, finding parents, going fot chats, mass toilet breaks etc. Part of doing shows is learning to occupy yourself quietly backstage.

Are you sure the kids weren’t allowed anything to do backstage??

My kids used to do a similar all day rehearsal then show but had to take colouring, books etc to keep them busy as well as lots of snacks.

Each class/age group had one or two chaperones who were usually mums (I chaperoned when mine were little so I could keep an eye on them). The very little ones were actually brought into the theatre to watch for part of the time. It was a long day but the kids loved it.

Perhaps you could volunteer next year to be a parent helper or chaperone at your childrens next show? It would give you the opportunity to keep an eye on your children, an insight into how much planning and hard work goes into staging a show, and how much so many children love being a part of it, despite the long days.

My daughter danced from a very young age and did annual shows with her dance school. Three shows spread out over two days with a dress rehearsal the day before the first show. About 200 kids taking part.
She loved every single moment of it, as did the other participants who joined in year after year.

Dance schools seem to provoke a very negative response on mumsnet. I fully appreciate that it's not for everyone, but my daughter and her dance friends gained so much from their dance school- fitness, fun, discipline, team work, friendships, confidence to perform and a huge sense of achievement.

Hanging out together at show time was a big part of making strong friendships over the years, not just with her own age group, but with the older ones and with much younger ones too, as she progressed through the school. She looked up to and admired the older ones, and as she became older, was looked up to herself by the younger ones.

I would say that a four hour show is much too long! Even with 200 pupils ours were just over 2 hours including the interval and finale.

My children have done dance for over 10 years and we've been to countless performances. The rehearsals are always on a different day and the performances in total have never gone longer than 3 hours. Some schools even split the juniors and seniors up so the juniors have the early session and can then go home. It doesn't sound very professional, I would be looking for another school if you have that option.

For body of persons licence they require for each child in our county.
Name, dob, school, and postcode.
Otherwise how do they not know if a child is performing more?
It also covers all children whether they've performed before or not, so you don't need to get licences for any

And all the children should still need to be under chaperone regulations too, so need fully trained chaperones etc.

It is silly that although legally it is the same, it varies per county what they actually tell people. Our county insists on 2 evening training to get chaperone status. Neighbouring one just gives it to anyone who asks. That means that I have been chaperoning with someone who not only doesn't know what the regulations are, they didn't even know there were regulations.

(I'm assuming you're England or Wales) as Scotland at any rate is slightly different in some things)

Sounds like the one and only performance my eldest did. It was really dull for everyone not in the senior section.

Mind you, same eldest recently spent twelve hours on coaches and five hours in rehearsals for the sake of eight minutes on stage at the Albert Hall.

I guess it all comes down to whether or not the child thought it worth the effort?

Our county asks for you to complete and pass an online safeguarding course, be DBS checked, have a full interview by the council, get 2 references that can testify to your competency to support children and provide full proof of ID along the lines of applying for a passport.

If the OP needs further guidance on the type of license and the 4 day rule etc, then here is a great guide that our council refers all us chaperones to.

assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/401345/Child_performance_and_activities_licensing_legislation_in_England_-departmental_advice-_final.pdf