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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

dd going out

54 replies

Igetboredeasily · 01/09/2018 16:44

Hello everyone.
We have recently moved and we are living next door to these two girls who are sisters and both seventeen years old. They are rebellious and have got up to bad things in the past. However, my dd (9 yrs) has become quite chummy with them. The two girls keep asking my dd out to town with them and I always say no as I'm anxious that she won't be looked after. The two seventeen-year-olds say I'm old-fashioned and need to stop being so overprotective.
AIBU and should I let my dd out in town with the two teens and loosen up?
TIA

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 01/09/2018 16:45

Not a hope. What if they get bored with her and bugger off? If you don't trust them then tell them to bugger off.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 01/09/2018 16:46

Personally, I think the age gap is too big, and tbh, I would wonder why they wanted to take a so much younger girl out with them?

IHaveBrilloHair · 01/09/2018 16:46

No way, two rebellious 17yr olds and a 9yr old?
That's madness.

Merryoldgoat · 01/09/2018 16:47

No way. Why on earth are 17 year olds being chummy with a 9 yo? Bizarre.

I’d be concerned about nefarious motives.

PositiveVibez · 01/09/2018 16:48

I can't believe you are doubting yourself over this.

17yo wanting to hang out with a 9yo is just plain weird.

I have a 9yo dd and there is no way I'd allow two 17yo take her out to hang out with.

Very odd.

Mumof4under10 · 01/09/2018 16:48

No yanbu I wouldn't allow it either.

Monny1 · 01/09/2018 16:50

No way, they sound dodgy as hell. Jamie Bulger rings to mind. I am probably over reacting, No, No, No!

SeamstressfromTreacleMineRoad · 01/09/2018 16:51

Definitely not. Ignore them - and encourage your daughter to make friends nearer to her own age who she can play with. If you haven't been there long, you've no idea whether the girls are capable and caring - or would think it funny to abandon your DD in town on her own (and frankly, their comments do them no favours...) Hmm

acatcalledjohn · 01/09/2018 16:55

The two seventeen-year-olds say I'm old-fashioned and need to stop being so overprotective.

They are seventeen. Their opinion of you is based on them not getting their way. And it's not like you trust them, or else you wouldn't be here asking the question.

YA most definitely NBU. They are.

Liskee · 01/09/2018 16:55

No! Don't do it!

Booboostwo · 01/09/2018 16:57

Jamie Bulger springs to mind here’s a Biscuit to take your mind off it.

If you don’t trust them there is no reason to let your DD go. Spend a bit of time getting to know them and decide in a few months.

Sirzy · 01/09/2018 16:57

Nope can’t be any good come from that one!

First thought that came to my mind (and I may be miles off of course) was someone to manipulate into shop lifting and things for them

Plutonium · 01/09/2018 16:58

So the two sisters live on their own?

cantfindamoniker · 01/09/2018 16:58

Definitely not. They won't have anything in common with a nine year old. She might be temporarily entertaining for them at best. Innocence can be amusing for teens. The 17yr old's are not likely to communicate age appropriately. I would also be wondering about the 17yr old's friends and acquaintances. Steer her clear.

NewYearNewMe18 · 01/09/2018 16:59

these two girls who are sisters and both seventeen years old.

twins?

Bimgy85 · 01/09/2018 16:59

Wtf? A nine year old out with a seventeen year old that's not family? No way not a chance.

It's actually dangerous. I hung around with a girl 3/4 years older than me when I was 9/10 and the stuff I learnt from her is ridiculous. They are at completely different stages.

Please don't let her. She needs friends her own age

Original poster
Igetboredeasily · 01/09/2018 16:59

Thank you everyone, you're right, it's definitely not a good idea.
I'll decide in a few months ...

OP posts:
Bimgy85 · 01/09/2018 17:00

The ONLY time a nine year old should ever be with a seventeen year old is if they are family, or getting babysat.

Original poster
Igetboredeasily · 01/09/2018 17:02

For the person who was asking if they live on their own, they don't it's just the mother seems as if she doesn't care, which I'm also concerned about...
There's no way that I'm letting her out now after your replies, you've helped me make my mind up...

OP posts:
Lindy2 · 01/09/2018 17:02

I can't see any good reason why two 17 year olds are so keen to go out with a 9 year old. I would be very suspicious especially as you haven't known them long. I would say no too.

SandyY2K · 01/09/2018 17:05

Absolutely no chance I'd let my 9 yo out with them.

JennyOnAPlate · 01/09/2018 17:05

No way in hell!!!

upsideup · 01/09/2018 17:16

I dont think its weird for a 17 year old to get along with a 9 year old, theres 11 years between dd1 and dd2 and they have always got on, hung out together and with each others friends sometimes.
If they were sensible then I would have no problem with it, dd2 who is now 11 is the youngest in her dance class so a lot of her friends are 12-15 and I let her go out with most of them.

MoodyMumOfOne · 01/09/2018 17:19

Just because they live next door, it does not mean you know them anymore than two randoms off the street so I will join the chorus of no, no way and not a chance!

AmericanEskimoDoge · 01/09/2018 17:22

Sounds strange. They can be friends without you letting them take your daughter out somewhere.

And as someone else has already said, why should you care what a couple of teenagers think about how you choose to raise your daughter?! Even if it were "old-fashioned" (which it's not), so what? There's nothing wrong with being slightly "old-fashioned" (even though that word really doesn't apply in this case).

Go with your gut.

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