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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Shocked by husbands behavour

84 replies

Raspberryberetthekindyoufind · 30/08/2018 15:35

Yesterday DH was putti g up wallpaper with this brother and FIL. MIL was also here. Early on I felt 2 I felt a pain in my eye really bad and said I thought I had a migraine so DH told me to go up to bed for a hour. He came up an hour later saying “when will you come down”. He had this idea that MIL and I would flirt around cleaning house while looking after 6 year old DS. I said I was in agony and if I could poss haven another hour that would be great. He stormed off but I was in too much pain to care.
About 30 minutes ago I woke up with a terrible pain over my eye and side of head and managed to crawl to the landing screaming out in agony.
DH came storming up saying “what do you want to do” and I managed to say I was in agony and felt sick. He stormed back down shouting at inlaws that he needs to take me to the hospital.

I crawled to the bathroom and was violently sick. DH came back up and I said I felt better but was still in a lot of pain. (Being sick when having a migraine always makes it feel better though I have never been in pain like this)
He says “Make up your mind and I suppose you can’t even be bothered to come down for five minutes” I said just give me a few minutes to get sorted and he said “don’t bloody bother” and stormed down the stairs shouting that “I can stay and finish off now”
Led on the bed feeling like shit. He did not even seem bothered with I was on my hands and knees screaming in agony.

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 30/08/2018 19:18

It does seem though the op has issues with her inlaws, her mother and sister in law appear to think she pretends she's had a fit to get out of doing stuff, that she is lazy and attention seeking.

Sadly It appears the father in law who was on her side as was the husband are also now of this opinion based on this thread. Except this time it's migraines. Hence why they all ignored her, and the husband told her he was assuming she just couldn't be bothered to come down and help.

Seems a family who are all very unsympathetic to thr ops illnesses and don't believe her.

Holidayshopping · 30/08/2018 19:23

Is he a horrible person usually? I suspect not or you wouldn’t have married him.

Have you talked to him to get his side?

Thishatisnotmine · 30/08/2018 19:30

Not to minimise your dh's actions but were you actually screaming? Sudden onset migraines are the worst for me but migraines also confuse senses. My 'screams' to me are just a small whimper to anyone else.

You should get to your GP and perhaps try a triptan (if you can). They can stop migraines or at least really reduce them. I suspect people who don'r understand the crawling, screaming and relief after being sick and the sense of confusion have never had a migraine.

Thishatisnotmine · 30/08/2018 19:32

And every migraine sufferer is different. During and just before I need darkness and no screens. As one is going I can look at a dim phone screen.

Raspberryberetthekindyoufind · 02/09/2018 06:32

30 minutes ago was meant to be 30 minutes later sorry. I have been ill which is why I have not been back. Had another headache attack and this time DH did take me to hospital and had apologise for his behaviour before. They think that may have been cluster headaches.

Yep i don’t get on with inlaws but FIL is usually ok. He and the brother had come around to help DH because he has had a bad back.

OP posts:
billybagpuss · 02/09/2018 07:04

Flowers hope you ok op and the hospital have been able to help

Dollymixture22 · 02/09/2018 07:08

I am shocked anyone would be this callous. I am sure your son was distressed. Please talk to someone about your family situation. If these people including your husband are content to ignore this sort of pain there is something very wrong.

Does he get angry when your son is ill?

Guavaf1sh · 02/09/2018 08:52

Does your vision go blurry? Do you see haloes? It sounds very odd for a migraine but could be closed angle glaucoma attacks

Icantbelieveitsnotnutter · 02/09/2018 08:59

They were prioritising the precious house over your welfare. Not good. I'm glad your dh has apologised but this would make me very wary of him in future. I hope you're feeling better Flowers

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