to be counting down the days until our hamster dies?

[SnuggMugg]

Just that really. 30 weeks pregnant and irritable. I hate our hamster. Is smells after a day. It makes a massive racket on its wheel. It has a horrid ugly cage. I feel guilty knowing it can't run around like a wild hamster should/would. It's just annoying and pointless. Hardly ever gets played with by DD. Am I a vile human being to have had a fleeting thought re how nice it is going to be when hamster is no more and refusing to get another?

Get a silent wheel, they are a few pounds in pets at home. Get it a bigger cage with lots of tunnels. Your sense of smell is heightened because of your pregnancy, you probably won't notice it after you give birth. Encourage your DD to be responsible, make it a daily chore to check food and water and teach her how to clean it out once a week. Boredom is not an excuse, she needs to learn that having a pet is a responsibility, it's a good life skill. Try to get her more interested in animals in general. If she gets bored of having a sibling she can't just ignore it can she?

Please don't just give the poor hammy away for free on Facebook to any old person who wants it. It deserves to be cared for properly.

sus hamster? Sibling? Bit different aren't they... 🤣

Also a hamster kept in a house should not hibernate. It won't have built up enough fat stores to be able to do so, so it needs to be living in a room at the same temperature as you would for a baby. Don't let it hibernate, it would be unlikely to survive.

@snuggmugg not in the sense they are both alive and need caring for. If the attitude in your house is that dependent animals are less important than the dependent humans then there is a problem.

I feel your pain OP & don't understand why some posters think you are a monster. It's not like you are mistreating the hamster! It also doesn't reflect in any way on your potential parenting skills!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We had small pets for years, as the DC 'loved' them for the first day and were then completely over it. I didn't mind them and all of them were kept in pristine conditions and fed the best food in our home - none of this out in the garage/ garden business. However, the last one lived an exceptionally long life & I have to say I was willing it to die for most of the last year of its existence. Fortunately, it wasn't a mind-reader, so it never knew or maybe it did and forced itself to carry on just to spite me.

Nothing wrong with harbouring such thoughts IMO and no those thoughts don't make you a bad person!

the attitude in your house is that dependent animals are less important than the dependent humans then there is a problem.

FFS! A rodent will always fall beneath a human in THIS house. In every sense. There is a hierarchy and humans are at the top.

That doesn't mean the pet isn't cared for it just means humans are top priority.

I will happily admit that my hamster is less important to me than my unborn child

animal threads do bring out strong emotions for a lot of posters

So we shouldn't have threads on subjects which bring out strong emotions?

What is this kindergarten?

I might get a banner for my desk just to warn people.

BEWARE. THIS PERSON HAS STRONG EMOTIONS. IF YOU LOVE HAMSTERS, DO NOT APPROACH

YANBU in the least, and I hope you have made it very clear to your DP that he is not to introduce any more animals to your home without prior discussion. There are rather too many men who think that it would be 'lovely' to have a pet, produce one and simply expect their female partners to take on the work of looking after it.
I can't stand hamsters either: if you must have a small rodent as a pet, rats are more interesting.

*Whispers
I don't think you are unreasonable in the least - this is Mumsnet at its finest!
If my husband had brought home a hamster without asking me I'd've been looking to rehome him as well as the hamster.
I don't know where all these cute furries are coming from - my brothers had hamsters when I was little and they were vile. I have scars on my fingers from the nips.

please be aware that animal threads do bring out strong emotions for a lot of posters

Yep.

It also brings out the fruit loops.

I might get a banner for my desk just to warn people

Your desk?

You go out to work?

WTAF are you thinking? You’re leaving the hamster home alone all day? Do you even have a hamster visitor in the day?

@SnuggMugg how old it it? Syrian hamster can live to 3 sometimes even 4 years.

Can suggest posting about rehoming online at Hamster Central, it's a hamster forum. I think you would be more likely to be successful in rehoming their rather than Facebook.

Unfortunately your cage is way too small. The very minimum a hamster cage should be is 360sqm. Cages bought in pet shops are way too small. I have converted detolf for my Russian hamster which has much smaller than a Syrian.

Peachpebbles, I consider the op to have failed her hamster as hammy is clearly unhappy (chewing cage is a bad sign). It seems a solid definition.

You wouldn't get a dog and then just feed it and let it run round the garden. That would be the bare minimum needs met. You talk to and pet the dog and build a bond. Why is it such a joke that a hamster would need theses needs met too? They need your attention, talked to, petted, so that they learn to trust you so don't live in fear of you.

So many people see small furry pets as 'less' than dogs or cats. It's 'just' a hamster so it's just so funny that people think it's cruel to not properly care for it. And people are shit with hamsters all the time so it's totally okay that the OP is too.

This post has reminded me of a long-suppressed memory of finding my hamster dead as a child, upside down with its legs in the air.

I wasn't that keen on it when it was alive either, to be honest.

360 square metres? Bloody hell thats a big hamster cage!

I don't think hamsters need to be talked to, or petted. They are solitary animals and are fine with lots of space which I am not provide it so we are trying to rehome. I'm not going to start talking to my hamster anytime soon.

Sorry it autocorrected to metre it 360sq inches

I remember a vet friend of mine saying that whoever decided Hamsters were a good child’s pet was “a total fuckwit”
Anyway OP, if you are looking after it properly it’s ok to silently hate it

YANBU to refuse to get another but your attitude towards this little hamster is disgusting. Find somebody who will value the hamster much more than you do and then don't ever have another pet.
YABU, poor little hamster.
Whereabouts in the country are you? Maybe MN can find a new home with somebody who will love him.

Meh. The hamster has no idea about my attitude... pretty sure she doesn't care!

@SnuggMugg I would definitely suggest rehoming it.

Your DP was pretty ignorant by not realising a hamster isn't just a toy or something that doesn't matter. This is obvious to me as he didn't discuss it with you and obviously didn't bother looking into caring for a hamster.

Unfortunately the problems you are having are of your own making. The cage is too small (causing bar chewing and smell), the wheel your using isn't ideal (caused by having a cage too small). What chew toys does it have as their teeth constantly grow.

@Plannergirl9 it has loads. Tubes. Toilet roll tubes. It has two mineral blocks to gnaw on. The wheel was one which the pet store recommended and said was best for its health. It is pretty big and well used. Lots of bedding, a little house at the top and bottom of the cage, a hamster football thing... has a fair bit!

Is DP onboard with rehoming her? How will DSD feel about it? After all, she’s only little and it’s not fair of DP to buy it for her then rehome it, if it’s going to upset her. It’s not fair of the cockwomble to buy her then leave you to look after her. He needs to be cleaning her out anyway, but especially when you’re pregnant and the smell is heightened. If you do decide to keep her and can’t spare anymore surface area then go up, it’s not as good, but with tubes etc it’s better than nothing.

I don’t really know whether they need attention & petting or whether they’re just as happy with their own company? But I’m not sure how you can resist talking to her...mind you, I talk to inanimate objects like the car & hoover too...so I’m probably not a good ‘yard stick’ 😂🤣

Despite not setting out to get another I’d offer to take her for you (if DSD is ok with her going to a new home) , but with renovating I can’t because there’s too much dust (every bloody where) for a hammy (and me frankly!)