Paying for your nanny's lunches

[nannykins22]

Am I being unreasonable? I am the nanny.. I take care of 2 children. The mother gave me a hefty kitty to entertain the children for 4 days this week. I spent less than half of the kitty! On one of the days, I took the children for pizza for lunch - 99% of the time I make sandwiches, and never buy lunch, so the pizza was a treat. I work all day with no set lunch, I eat when the children eat..

When I submitted the breakdown of expenditure this week, the parent removed my pizza and drink, and only refunded me the children's expenses...

I think this is utterly unfair! To put into context, I NEVER submitted any additional expenses for my lunch, this was a one off!

Do you pay for your child carer's lunch? Within reason?!!! Am I being unreasonable?!!!

YANBU. We pay for our nanny’s meals, drinks and snacks whilst working - it’s the norm for most nanny employers and part and parcel of the fact they eat with the children. I wouldn’t expect to pre approve every time they go out to a cafe or restaurant or whether they have pop corn at the cinema etc, either, but we have talked about what a reasonable level for this is and leave a kitty to pay for it.

Your employers are very stingy. I’m not sure how you could take them out and sit there with a tap water. Just as presumably they pay for you if you take them to the cinema, a zoo or soft play.

Why can't you take it out of the kitty or do you have to break down expenditure within the kitty?

Oh I understand it perfectly well bbc!

Nannies don't get a paid lunch break which is precisely why their lunch is meant to be provided.

I wouldn’t expect to pre approve every time they go out to a cafe or restaurant or whether they have pop corn at the cinema etc, either, but we have talked about what a reasonable level for this is and leave a kitty to pay for it.

This must be the way sensible people, who value the services of their childcare provider, would play it? Surely?

Your employers have shown you what they think of you. Yes, fair enough, if you're eating out every day then a conversation about what level of expenditure is expected is fine. But if they want their kids to go out and about, then they have to accept there are associated expenses.

Very mean,so they expect you to entertain their kids but won't pay for the nanny. I bet they would!d not be happy if you did free or cheap things would they! You would!d not be at the pizza restaurant if it was not for the kids, you are there accompanying their kids on their activities, your expenses should!d be paid. My dd has as a carer as she has Asd and learning difficulties, the money I give to the carer includes their expenses as well. If drawings fast food,it includes money for the carer to have something.

I wouldn’t expect to pre approve every time they go out to a cafe or restaurant or whether they have pop corn at the cinema etc, either, but we have talked about what a reasonable level for this is and leave a kitty to pay for it.

I nannied for ten years and this was how all the families I worked with did it. Occasionally there would be a big special treat and that would be discussed separately, but on the most part we worked out ahead of time what a reasonable budget was. My meals etc were always paid unless I got something special (in which case I'd charge them for something reasonable and pay the extra myself).

But if they want their kids to go out and about, then they have to accept there are associated expenses
Of course.
But who said the parents wanted the children to eat out?
When I was a SAHP and went to restaurants with the DC it was more as a treat for me, nice food, a break from cooking and cleaning the associated mess.

OP, did they ask you to take the children out? Or said it was ok to go to restaurants with them?

urbu op said that the parents gave her a sum of money to entertain the kids, I presume that means taking them out to places, eating out if it's lunchtime, not staying at home.

Within that money, all op expenses should be paid, as she is accompanying and looking after them, she is working.

Maybe next time, op needs to clarify beforehand what that includes, her enterance or lunches whilst out with her charges. Look for another family if it happens again, very mean.

Similar happened to a friend OP

She did enquire about it and said she couldn't really afford to pay each time she took the children out (The mother of these children would often suggest it and suggest places they should go).

The response she got was that she was welcome to take her lunches from their fridge to the restraunts

Donald seriously?

I hope she left!

Name She did indeed, straight away.

She did tell them some places won't allow you to eat your own food and the reply was "just explain the situation". As far as I know, she didn't bother to ask what they meant and was with a lovely new family shortly afterwards

Golden rule: never piss off your Nanny.

Of course the employer stumps for lunch, we also buy our nanny’s preferred tea, cereal and milk even though she’s the only one that likes it.

Very simple: you arrange and pay for your own lunch during your own unpaid break, during which you have no responsibilities at all and the time is completely your own. If you're expected to work the whole day through without a complete break (which I'm not sure is actually legal), you have a right to be fed at reasonable intervals at the employer's expense. No difference in principle from having your petrol paid for if you're asked to travel to meetings during work time by your employer.

Hilarious. Left you a kitty and then clawed back your expenses from it? Nope. I am certain you can get another job easily and I'd start looking - and clarify up front that eating when caring for children is to be paid for. Might be worth going to a nannying agency or something similar to see if you can find a standard contract to include overtime etc. Just because you work in a house doesn't entitle them to exploit you.

She did indeed, straight away

Good. I wonder how many nannies they went through before they realised they were BU

Yanbu. That’s really stingy.

WellErrr Thu 23-Aug-18 22:03:25
Hmmm. We have a nanny and she massively takes advantage at times. If we paid for her meal out every time she fancied taking the kids to Pizza Hut she'd be there every week. So I'd deduct it too in our case.

OP has already explained that she was given a budget for the week and spent only a fraction of it. She is not taking advantage.

Of course the parents should have paid.

Yes in restaurants or food places, you cannot take your lunch in, it is not allowed. So the poor nanny has to sit there and watch the kids eat, whilst she waits to have her packed lunch, very nasty. In the care companies contract that I sign, it is my responsibility to pay all carers expenses whilst out with my child, including lunch as she is at work and looking after my child. I also have to pay 45p per mile as well. Find another nicer employer op.

Good Donald I am glad she left, demeaning the nanny like that, the very person looking after her kids.

Your employer is the Queen of mean. Find another job where you're appreciated.

No difference in principle from having your petrol paid for if you're asked to travel to meetings during work time by your employer.

Good way of putting it.