Bar tab at christening

[shockedandsurprised]

Dh and I can't agree so I'm after some opinions. We're planning a christening for ds and have booked a function room in a local pub for a buffet afterwards. We're paying for the buffet and will also be doing a champagne toast. Dh thinks guests can then buy their own drinks at the bar. I think we should have a tab and pay for everyone's drinks.

I was always under the impression that at a christening the parents paid for all the guests, dh thinks paying for food and a glass of champagne is enough. Christening is at midday so we're talking early afternoon for the meal so people won't be going crazy, and lots of people will be driving as none of our family and friends live particularly close so I'm not expecting it to be a huge amount of money.

What do other people think/what have been your experiences?

I think a lot of this depends on what type of Christian you are tbh, as traditions obviously vary a lot!

I'm Catholic (of Irish descent, living in England) and I have only ever known one christening that wasn't followed by a party, and that was because the baby's mother had lost her mother (so the child's grandmother) during late pregnancy. So when baby was born she was still very much in the mourning period, and just had the church service. None of us were invited, only the couple and the godparents attended.

Every other baptism in my family has been followed by a party. It's not intended to be a piss up, but it is definitely a celebration and people dress up, have hair done (if that's something they'd usually do for a special party) etc. There's not normally a free bar, or champagne in my experience, it's more like a birthday party than a wedding. Pub/social club function room, buffet, pay your own way at the bar. Maybe a bit of dancing!

I'm not sure if it's a regional thing or a Catholic/c of e thing, but it's certainly not a generational thing. The christenings I went to as a child are exactly the same as the ones I attend nowadays.

*make sure there's tap water perhaps

Quick OP - cancel that venue you were going to book with no running water!*

TBF that did sound pretty stupid of me. I meant that people didn't feel obliged to spend money when they've already bought baby a present and travelled a distance, unless you think money is not an issue to your family and friends.

For my DC's christenings we hired a hall, hired a caterer and bought loads of drinks (soft and alcoholic) for our approx 80 guests. Very Caribbean way to celebrate a christening. And there was a DJ.