ExH and weed, conspiracy theory shit...

[PipeTheFuckDown]

Donning my hard hat for this one.

ExH and I split 7 years ago. We’ve always coparented well, he pays child support and extras, sees them regularly, takes them on holidays, and helped out last year with after school care when I attended college. We have a DD10 and a DD7.

However. In the last 18 months it’s all got a bit bizarre, and things weren’t quite adding up, but only in the last week have things been revealed that make it all slot into place.

It started off with Flat Earth. Then Anti Vaxx. Then lizard people and the Illuminati, big pharma shills, how I don’t need my medication (Major Depressive, CPTSD, clinically anxiety - I really fucking do need it) That Autism etc don’t exist (me and our second DD going through diagnosis at the moment; suspected Aspergers) Dont trust Doctors, only eat raw vegan food as that fixes everything. Turns off my Google Home when he’s here because they’re listening. There’s no space, we live under a dome. There’s more but this is just a brief idea.

At first I just laughed it off, but he’s started getting our DC to watch these videos on YouTube and is going on and on and on. At present the DC are rolling their eyes (I’m a Biology student so they just think Daddy is a bit thick and doesn’t understand basic Science) but obviously I’m seriously concerned about this now.

It’s also been revealed that he is smoking a lot of weed. Hes single, worked for the same company (and been promoted many times) for 20 years, stable income, stable life, so I’m baffled by this bizarre behaviour.

I’m not entirely sure what to do. My gut tells me that I have to stop contact due to his drug use and the fact that it’s damaging his mental health. We’ve never been to court as we’ve never needed to but I’m not sure how else to protect DC from this, or where I’d stand legally on it.

AIBU?!

MN must be a brainwashed pro vaccination place OR ELSE.

Getting tedious now.

Justine whatever your name is who made a fortune from us parents' input and has always been locked in to power politics just fess up that on MN absolutely NO questioning of mass over vaccination is allowed.

The man is impaired and people are defending it all because of the vaccination part of OP’s post. He is doing other things to put his children at risk of harm.

This man doesn’t believe in car seats. Seriously! He is unsafe to parent and drive his children.

@hottotrottosky I can assure you this is no joke, he DOES believe all the things I mentioned and many other things that I haven’t mentioned because to be honest, even the things I have mentioned are fucking bizarre.

To the PP who said they were vegan - I am actually vegan myself

To the solicitor (sorry I’m on my phone and can’t skip back pages without losing my message) Thankyou for backing me up on this. I was starting to doubt myself.

Smoking lots of weed made an old friend of mine very paranoid, caused a colleague of mine to be sectioned with Psychosis, caused short term memory loss & loss of motivation for anything but getting more weed in several lads I used to mix with....

I used to smoke it very occasionally in my 20s but enjoyed it too much so I stopped as I do have an addictive personality (I had to stop drinking too).

I think that your ex shouldn't be looking after your kids if he is driving with cannabis in his system & choosing not to use car seats.

The conspiracy stuff is irritating but not a reason in itself to stop access except if it is causing your ex to put the kids at risk which sadly it is due to him following his 'beliefs'.

There is a strong association between the smoking of weed and psychosis. I heard a while back that an astonishing number of people who are diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia have started smoking weed within in the previous 6 months. Can’t remember where I saw that (I did look it up) but it was something like 70%! It stuck with me because I have an in-law with paranoid schizophrenia and he was smoking a lot when he was diagnosed.

I don’t think you’re unreasonable to be concerned. Lots of people will say weed is no big deal and maybe for some people, it isn’t. However your ex is putting your children at risk. Given your background, I’m not surprised you’re worried, you know how it can escalate! I would formally get legal advice on this situation - about contact and your concerns.

Could be another form of mental illness but weed really cant be helping.

There's people that aren't on drugs and strongly believe all those things you mentioned.

Filzma you are correct. Which makes it even more worrying.

So what would happen if your children were ill and needed medication? Would he simply refuse to administer it on his contact time? That could seriously impact on their health and effectiveness of antibiotics is no good if the course isn't taken correctly. Not using car seats is illegal. And this is without even factoring in the weed smoking.

I'd seek legal advice on this. It is more than just a conflict of ideals.

Sorry op I do y belive that he just started smoking weed recently

Unless your very young it’s not the sort of thing you just start taking up most people who somone weed have been doing for an age

Paranoia and psychosis are directly connected with smoking newer forms of weed. I know someone who was convinced his mil was breaking into his flat and cleaning the fish-tank with his toothbrush. Totally out of character. It ended up with d.v. in front of a toddler, SS involvement, and re-hab. Back to normal when he stopped the weed.

There are people with MH issues who've never smoked weed. People who smoke weed and function normally. So what? Op's DH's behaviour has become increasingly bizarre. He's also smoking a lot of weed. Neither does the dcs any good. Op is entirely right to stop contact till it can be sorted out.

Drugs in any way are a complete nNO for me.
Is he drug driving with DD's - that would ensure I get him tested.
If he is 'weed inspired' his life will fall apart anyway.
2 choices 1. tell him to stop weed or you will seek a court order to get him tested and remove DD's

1. Be a liberal goody 2 shoes and wait until daughters come home with the language and the makings, if they come home in one piece.

Who is the more important? At their age they can manage if they never see their Dad again - he's a liability waiting to explode.

@metoodear I didn’t say he’d only just started smoking it, I said I’d only just found out that he smokes it, and I agree with you, it’s probably been going on for a while.

With regards to medication - yes it’s likely he wouldn’t administer it - which is why I’ve never allowed them to go to his when they’ve needed antibiotics.

@decentchap I totally agree with you, there is zero chance I’m being a liberal goody two shoes when it comes to the safety of my DC.