AIBU to worry baby will be ugly like me?

[namechangedembarassedmum]

MN regular but NC for this. I of course want a healthy baby above all else, so I apologise if this seems crass, but I'm really quite distressed about it. When I look in the mirror I feel distraught at the thought that the baby might come out looking like hideous me. I'm not particularly attractive and loads of people would likely describe me as ugly, and I've been struggling with body image even more during pregnancy. I've somehow been lucky to have a loving and attractive DH and I hope the baby looks like him. (This is something that's always been troubling for me, people always remark how handsome DH is when they see photos, and I can tell they're surprised someone so good looking would be with someone like me )

I know I will love my baby no matter what (and again, want the baby to be healthy and happy above all else) but I just feel bloody awful that it might go through its life as the ugly one and have to be skipped over in favour of other boys/girls, or just the disappointment and frustration of looking in the mirror every day. I've accepted that I'll never win any prizes for my looks but it's taken me a long time and I feel sad for a baby to have to go through that as well. Anyone else felt this way? I'm rather embarrassed and can't dream of bringing it up during a midwife visit.

ooof this is lowkey such a thicc mood but honestly, babies are always so cute, i wouldnt worry about it! as long as you teach your child to be kind and humble, they’ll get on fine. i know looks matter a lot, especially with ~social media~ but you learn to make the best of what you have and with the right attitude anyone can be beautiful UwU

Genes are weird things. It’s entirely possible to look exactly like one parent and inherit very little from the other but it is rare. Quite often everyone is an amalgamation of both parents and sometimes other relatives thrown in there too. Haven’t you ever heard someone comment on how a child looks like their grandmother/uncle/cousin etc? It happens. Sometimes children look nothing like either parent because they’re a combination of lots of different genes. The chance of this child looking 100% like you is slim.

Also I’ll go against the grain and say newborns aren’t pretty at all . They look like scrunched up old men... but to you, that will be the most beautiful baby you’ve ever set eyes on.

This post made me so sad. I think that all women feel crap about their appearance from time to time. But EVERYONE has something about them that is beautiful. And as my Nan used to say, nobody is pretty with a sour face and a wicked heart. The worst thing you can do is pass your insecurity about looks onto your child and most of it is just about confidence. Go and see the film “I Feel Pretty” and be confident in yourself (your personality will shine through in your looks).