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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask nursery not to let DS play with pens?

64 replies

PleaseLetItBeNapTime · 17/08/2018 15:56

DS is almost two and attends nursery. Whilst he is not really fussed about crayons he loves to have a scribble in pen and staff at nursery have seen this. The issue is that he has been coming home with his clothes covered in ink which I can’t get out (I’ve tried using alcohol and glycerine to no avail).

WIBU to have a chat with nursery and ask them not to let him have pens? To me that’s common sense unless he is closely supervised, but they seem to think it’s ok which makes me feel that IABU?

Just as a side note DS goes to nursery mostly in Primark’s finest and wears his nicer clothes on non-nursery days, but all the same I’ve had to throw away quite a few items now and money doesnt grow on trees.

OP posts:

Frogscotch7 · 17/08/2018 15:57

Just put him into nursery in the stained clothes and let him have his fun. He’ll be grown out of them in about 3 seconds anyway.

vandrew4 · 17/08/2018 15:57

just send him in with the scribble- stained clothes. he's not going to be fussed

Arrowfanatic · 17/08/2018 15:58

Yes yabu. Just send him in the stained clothes and let him have fun.

IceCreamFace · 17/08/2018 15:58

I agree just keep the ink stained stuff for nursery surely? Although you'd think nursery would have washable felt tips. Or does he just like biros?

KingLooieCatz · 17/08/2018 16:00

Why anyone buys pens that are not washable where children are involved is a constant mystery to me. That doesn't help you much though.

Peachesandcream15 · 17/08/2018 16:00

Just send him in the stained clothes and do your best on the washing, no one will think anything of it! My dd has been wearing t shirts stained with sunscreen to nursery all summer, same as last year. It's just how it is!

ourkidmolly · 17/08/2018 16:00

Don't even try to get the stain out, just wash and throw it on him. The primark t shirt is £1.50, the stain remover is more. You'll sound a wally speaking to them about a no pen rule.

Original poster

PleaseLetItBeNapTime · 17/08/2018 16:04

Thanks everyone for your replies.

I had been contemplating sending him in in stained clothes but was a bit worried that I’d be judged for that.

Yes I too thought that washable felt tips would be a standard, which he would also like, but it appears that they only have crayons in his room.

OP posts:

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 17/08/2018 16:04

Agree with those above, just wash it and then send him into nursery wearing it. I am not sure why you would throw away clothes you know are clean just because they have pen stains on them? He wont be drawing on himself forever but I have know children still coming home with pen on their clothes age 7-8 are you really going to stop him using them for the next 5-6 years? Also just curious but how do you think he will learn to not get pen on himself if he is not allowed to use pens? Honestly no one will care if his t-shirts have marks and stains on them least of all your son, he is 2 let him enjoy scribbling on himself.

megletthesecond · 17/08/2018 16:05

Yanbu. Stained clothes are fine.
And yy about the stain remover being more expensive than the actual clothes.

Soubriquet · 17/08/2018 16:06

I know it doesn't look nice but send him in the scribbled clothes

They are clean just stained

Soubriquet · 17/08/2018 16:08

And if it helps, I've sent my Ds in the same clothes for 5 days in a row as I know he will get filthy at some point. If he comes home clean, I'll put them back on him. This way he gets to be as messy as he wants without filling up the washing basket

HollyBen · 17/08/2018 16:08

I had many conversations with nursery about being unable to get their paint out of clothes. They maintained it was washable. I have no idea what you had to wash them in as nothing I used worked.
Anyway anyone who judges you for sending your kid to nursery in pen stained clothes isn't worth worrying about.

gatheringmoss · 17/08/2018 16:14

I don't think washable exists. Our washable paint stains everything. But after a few wears it's fades or gets a new layer of stain over it.

Pen marks surely don't count. As soon as you buy new stuff it gets stained.

ImogenTubbs · 17/08/2018 16:17

They will judge you more for asking them not to let him play with pens than for sending him in ink-stained clothes.

81Byerley · 17/08/2018 16:19

I agree with everyone else. Just as an aside, try spraying scribble with hairspray and rub with baby wipes.

GrannyD57 · 17/08/2018 16:20

I was advised by a friend who is a cleaner to soak clothes with biro on them in milk. It works!

AntoinetteOuradi · 17/08/2018 16:20

I misread the thread title, and thought it was about stopping DS from playing with his penis.

That aside, another vote for sending him to nursery in stained clothes. Honestly, nobody will give it a second's thought.

PorkFlute · 17/08/2018 16:22

Why not just pick him up some dark coloured stuff and let him wear that for nursery?
Boys tend to be reluctant writers when it comes to school age so I’d be very reluctant to discourage him mark making and building up the muscles he needs in his hands just because he gets pen on his clothes.

Guienne · 17/08/2018 16:22

You can tell the nursery why you are sending your child in in stained clothes, they'll probably be glad. You could also have a bit of a discussion with them about using pens with washable ink.

PorkFlute · 17/08/2018 16:23

And unless each child has 1-1 supervision I’m other sure how you expect the most to make sure none of the children get marks on their clothes.

TheFairyCaravan · 17/08/2018 16:23

You need hairspray. Any cheap hairspray will get the ink out.

DS1(23) got a tattoo last week amd somehow they managed to cover the front of his expensive, white t-shirt in tattoo ink. The bloke was sorry, DS1 said it was his fault for wearing it and was going to bin it. I sprayed the front liberally with hairspray and washed on a 40 degree cycle, there’s not a speck of ink on it now.

I’ve used hairspray loads when pens have been left in pockets, or when DS2 has got ink on his nursing tunic and it’s not let me down yet.

shoelaces · 17/08/2018 16:23

At school, my yr 1 child does a daily challenge on wipe boards. Either a sum to work out or copy a sentence and fill in the blanks. It's done on dry erase boards.

My son comes home every day with marker pen on his fingers, mouth, shirt and trousers. Then when they do any other activity he also gets covered in that. And his lunch is always in his shirt. I start each term off with 7 shirts and I replace 2 very half term. I take the worst stained out and replace.

You will need to get used to sending your child in with pen stains on their clothes. Or dress him in black only.

IceCreamFace · 17/08/2018 16:23

My eldest is 7 and still comes homes from school absolutely coated in tomato sauce from lunch (I've tried to teach him to get the food in his mouth not on his clothes but with no luck), mud all over and usually some kind of pencil, pen and paint mark on his white shirt.

I do my best to get it out but I don't just replace it, mainly because I think it's probably not very ethical or environmental to replace a shirt every two wears. They're kids it's fine for them to be a bit messy.

timeforachangeithink · 17/08/2018 16:24

Holly for paint soak in COLD water not hot. I could never get it out till someone told me this.

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