To have fallen out with my friends boyfriend because he takes the....

[SlimmingMumOf1]

Piss?

Every time I see my friend and her long term boyfriend who is in his 20s, he always says to me "have you shrunk or something? You're getting smaller!", I usually laugh it off but I have literally had it up to here with it. I know I am small (4'11"), I don't need to be reminded about it every single time I see them!

Yesterday, we decided to meet for a coffee and her boyfriend was walking with her on his way to work, I said hello to him then he said "you still haven't grown. Why are you so small", I immediately stopped in my tracks and told him why don't he take a good look at his ugly mug in the mirror and to grow the F up.

My friend was mortified. She said that she will text me later instead but she never did. I'm sorry but I just lost my temper with it! Surely I was not being unreasonable? I don't usually have a short fuse but yesterday really got to me! We are in our 20s FFS, surely that's what immature young idiots say to each other.

I actually think he fancies you OP and your friend may suspect this given the attention and "jokes" he always attempts with you.

Fair enough @echt, we disagree.

Echt When there are marches against short people, when short people can be regularly shot dead by police without any consequence, when short people receive disproportionately punitive jail sentences compared to tall people, when short people are rounded up and used as literal slaves. THAT'S when you can compare being short to being black. Now off you fuck

It's not a hierarchy of suffering. You don't have to earn suffering points to be accorded decent treatment at the hands of others. Short people, or any other non-shot-at types should not have to console themselves by saying: at least I'm not black. Or bide their time until the weight of history says enough is enough.

The ability to generate from the particular is a way forward in thinking.

No-one should ever ever be made fun of/ discriminated against because of innate characteristics.

echt in the kindest possible way you are making a complete fool of yourself here. If you continue, that is of course entirely up to you, but you really are showing yourself right up.

Ffs, don't speak for all short people! Usually we can tell when someone is trying to start some friendly banter and when someone is being a dick.
I don't personally find short jokes offensive as I am perfectly happy with my height and happy to poke fun at it. If someone starts telling me I can't do something or can't go somewhere because of my height, then that's different.

@LyndorCake Quite, and a point I and others were making earlier. But then there are people who seem to be insistent on being professionally offended on behalf of other people, aren't there?

@YeTalkShiteHen Indeed. But then you're arguing with a poster who once thought it was arrogant of the author Helen Fielding to want to read the audiobook of her second Bridget Jones novel herself rather than the actor who read the first. Arrogant to want to read your own book. FFS (as @echt herself would say).

Fuck that. It's not fucking funny to make fun of someone's appearance. He shouldn't give it if he can't take it. Your friend should be mortified that he's been making jokes at your expense and you had to shut it down. Some friend.

I'm short btw and at no point would I have found this funny.

He was a twat and you called him on it.

People should not be able to derail threads like this. It is such an obvious tactic and yet it is condoned.
I agree.

It seems most of us agree that the OP was right to call him out on his 'jokes but the disagreement comes from how/when to call him out.
I don't see how race remotely comes into it.

Quite.

YANBU
You did nothing wrong. Please don't contemplate apologising or trying to smooth things over for one even second!

Your friend is not much of a friend if she stood by so often whilst her boyfriend was so nasty and immature. It doesn't speak well of her at all, and shows she has absolute crap taste in men. Unless they both apologise to you, then I wouldn't bother with either of them again.

Even my pre-teen knows that repeatedly mocking someone's height is never just friendly banter or a joke. He's a bully. You called him on it. Bravo

Good for you OP. How would he like it if someone took the piss out of him every time they saw him? & what's up with your so called friend, not telling him to leave it out?

I'd bin the pair of them, they're too stupid for words.

Ignore the schadenfreude of pp's pretending they think you're in the wrong for standing up to an ignorant bully. It's never ok to mock someone's physical appearance. No excuse for it.

Wow, I'm surprised by those posters telling the OP what she should have done and making out she's in the wrong. Maybe you're the same people who tell a victim of bullying what they should have done or tell then to grow up because they were pushed too far by a bully and snapped. Sometimes comments are funny the first few times but after while, they become less funny.

OP don't blame you for how you reacted. Send your friend a text explaining why you snapped at her boyfriend and if she doesn't say anything to you or back you up, maybe she's nor a friend.

and if her so called friend picks a man over a good, long standing friend then she isn’t much of a friend.

Unfortunately they usually do pick the man over the friend.

echt you could have made a comparison with tall women who are mocked for their height. You're not one of those virtue-signalling liberal anti-racists, are you?

The type who immediately they come across a black person will turn the convo towards race every single time, then whitesplain how said person should feel think and act concerning racism and oppression.. because you know best of course.

You're as bad as outright racist yobs because you will seek ways and words to trivialise racism and oppression by using the incomparable, and patronisingly assume we won't notice because you're being 'wordy'.

We do, though.

Tell your friend what you have told us.

If my BF made constant tedious comments about my friend every time they met I would have told him myself. In fact I would have told him the first time he did it.

These people always think they are the first and only to make some witticism.

Actually, could he be trying to purposely upset you so you don't socialise as a three?

Same height here and I agree that would wind me up, things like that are funny the first time (if even) then should never be said again 🙄

You did the right thing. He's clearly a dick head.

I would apologise to him for snapping and your reason for doing so and move on, he will continue otherwise, his mocking is his personality nothing to do with his age or maturity all will be ok

allthegoodusernameshavegone

his mocking is his personality nothing to do with his age or maturity

So he is basically a twat, and we should put up with it?

The quick answer to that is no.

Allthegoodusernames. Would you put up with it.

He's an annoying arse. Hopefully now he understands.