To think the hospital could do a bit more?

[EyeSpyaBlueFoot]

Had to bring DS1 and DS5 with me to AE because I dropped a kitchen appliance on my foot from a great height last night. It turned all sorts of colours and looked like a cartoon foot this morning.

We waited 2.5 hours and I had to change DS1s nappy. Told the receptionist in case my name was called. Came back out and checked with her it hadn't been called. After another hour I ask how much longer they think it might be to be told I'd missed my name being called and I'll have to start again in the queue. Not a word of apology from the receptionist. Two hours later we are called in to have my foot X-ray. I now have very grumpy fed up small kids. X-ray tech is using as few words as possible and simply points and says they have to stay behind the wall. I completely agree but how? I try bribing the little one with snacks but he's 1 and keeps coming to me. X-ray tech getting irritated. DS5 trying his best to pin DS1 but it's just not happening and DS5 has autism so this is no small asknof him. Eventually the tech, without giving me the choice, takes the X-rays with both kids stood behind the bed (I couldn't see them and thought DS5 had manage to pin DS1). AIBU unreasonable to think we could have expected a tiny bit more help or is that standard?

Before anyone asks DH is on a business trip in another country and no one else could come with me.

Blimey, our local hospital have play workers and a creche for exactly this kind of situation. No of course you shouldn't have had to cope with no help. Instead of saying 'yabu what do you expect with budget cuts' the response should be 'how horrific that budget cuts put you in an impossible situation and that two small children have been needlessly exposed to X-rays as a result'. Also, budget cuts don't mean that human sympathy should go out of the window - the X-ray technician sounds unhelpful and rude. The situation isn't your fault at all despite what some posters have said. You did the best you could. Your foot takes priority, and though obviously in an ideal world you'd find childcare for tomorrow, if you can't you should absolutely bring them with you again rather than risk a break going untreated. That's a total no-brainer.

I agree. I think some people have very unrealistic expectations of how easy it is to build a support network and come up with last minute childcare and SN is only going to make it harder.

I think it would have been nice if someone could have helped but everything is so stretched there is no slack, no spare few mins or pair of hands.
I do think you need to have a back up though. If your foot had needed immediate surgery to pin it then you would have been in a awful mess. I assume the hospital would phone social services and arrange emergency foster care if there really is no one in uk to assist until DH could fly home.

"You would need a plan for DC then and so should have had one before going at all."

And this is actively dangerous advice. You can't seriously be suggesting somebody ignore a multiply broken foot until they can find childcare?!!! If the OP had needed admission then social services would have had to find emergency foster care in the absence of any other solution, at least until the DH could make it home.

To people saying nhs staff should of done more, the X-ray person isn't child care why should he have to try and distract two children and do his job at the same time? He needs to focus on what's he's doing! If he doesn't get the picture he needs and send the OP out and then she gets sent back by the doctors for a re take him saying I was trying to watch her kids isn't going to be a good enough reason for him not doing his job

SnuggyBuggy absolutely! Once I did actually have to ask a neighbour (DP at work, Mum in hospital, no friends nearby) when I had to call an ambulance for DS1 (head injury, vomiting and unsteady on his feet) but we’d known each other years and were usually in and out of each other’s houses so she knew my kids (both autistic) and more importantly, they knew her!

BUT I’m aware that that is sadly unusual with neighbours in today’s society.

I’m sorry OP you have had a bad enough time without the horrible comments you have had on here as well

God help the day any of them need help

NightOwl101 he didn’t do his job though.

I worked for the NHS for many many years. I would have held your baby or asked a colleague to help. The radiographer was a dick.

I agree you did the best you could and could reasonably have expected more help. I would put in a complaint about the receptionist putting you to the back of the queue. However when your foot is better it would be a good idea to develop a plan for a potential emergency - even if that is find childcare for youngest DC and take eldest with you. (But then I have had multiple trips to hospital in the last few years so perhaps think about this a bit more than most people!)

In a real emergency the hospital could have got social services to arrange something for your children, in the event you needed surgery or admitting. At which point I'm sure the op's husband would have been called to return. When is he next home?

@howabout there aren't minor injuries clinics everywhere and it needed to be x rayed. Only other option I suppose was go to gp to be referred for x ray to avoid sitting around in a&e.

Laughing at all the people suggesting leaving an autistic kid with a neighbour they don't know.

I hope you have some strong painkillers now.

Try and go to your appointment tomorrow. But try your best to get the pushchair downstairs and take it with you. Then the little one can be contained when needed, even if they cry.

I think YABU. You seem to be simultaneously annoyed that you had to wait because it was busy but also expect the stretched staff to help look after your children. I sympathise in that it sounds like a frustrating situation but I think next time calling in a favour from a friend something to help with the kids would have been a better solution.

Op: I've just moved and don't know anyone.

Pp: why didn't you call in a favour from a friend

Haapy op has already said she's new to the area and her ds is autistic. So what would you have done in her shoes?! I have plenty of emergency options for my kids but I'm at least aware of what a fortunate position that is to be in.

Just because the nhs are stretched doesn't mean that compassion and kindness can be forgotten about.

This all over.

I'm sorry you've had the experience you did and that people have piled in on you here.

All these people saying the op should have just accepted shitty, brutalising "care" from the NHS, I presume are not also the same people who'd cry about how wonderful and perfect the NHS is? Or is the pile on because the op dared to say something critical about the NHS, the God before which we much all bow in deference?

If we care about and want to protect the NHS we have to speak honestly about the shitty levels of care that result from deliberate and crippling restrictions on its budget. We don't lower our fucking standards and then berate anybody who dares question our collective stupidity.

You need to try and go tomorrow you could severely damage your foot if you don't

Christ alive, MN loves to give someone a kicking when they're down.

YANBU, OP. They could have helped you.

Is it really inconceivable that sometimes there is nobody you can ask?

I feel for you. You need to be seen tomorrow. If you can’t arrange childcare your husband needs to come home. Where is he?

Really horrible situation for you Op -nightmare stuff! I agree with PP, you need to prioritise getting an agency ASAP. No one shout be totally alone when the have young children. Hope you are more mobile soon.

Which others countries have you ever experienced healthcare in?
Sorry our NHS was rubbish with you. Sounds like you were stuck in an impossible situation.

Op. Your husband NEEDS to come home on the next available flight. You are in no condition to be caring for two children, one very young and one with additional needs.

You need to attend that appointment tomorrow because it sounds like you could definitely make things worse if it was left too long.

Have you made contact with your health visitor service yet? Ring them tomorrow and ask if there are any services they can put you in touch with.

Your eldest would possibly fare better staying with you but your youngest needs to be looked after. Even if that someone attends your appointment with you but sits in the waiting room with baby.

Yes, it is utterly shit that there isn't a crèche facility available or care for non-patient children except in the most extreme cases. But this isn't the NHS's fault.

I know I would step up and help if you were a neighbour of mine, but then I have experience of a child with additional needs and a husband who isn't just available at the drop of a hat. I know how bloody impossible it is sometimes to find childcare and I do have friends and family I can ask.

I can't think of any other workplace where this treatment by staff would be acceptable other than the NHS.
We seem to have a complete blind spot to rude and dismissive behaviour when it comes from NHS workers - being a HCP seems to be a free pass to treating others like shit if the mood takes you.
If you made arrangements with the receptionist prior to l aging the waiting room, you should not have lost your place in the queue. Why would anyone think that was fair?
As for the x-ray, I agree with pps - being overstretched does not mean you can't be caring and empathetic. If indeed they were overstretched in the first place.