To think the hospital could do a bit more?

[EyeSpyaBlueFoot]

Had to bring DS1 and DS5 with me to AE because I dropped a kitchen appliance on my foot from a great height last night. It turned all sorts of colours and looked like a cartoon foot this morning.

We waited 2.5 hours and I had to change DS1s nappy. Told the receptionist in case my name was called. Came back out and checked with her it hadn't been called. After another hour I ask how much longer they think it might be to be told I'd missed my name being called and I'll have to start again in the queue. Not a word of apology from the receptionist. Two hours later we are called in to have my foot X-ray. I now have very grumpy fed up small kids. X-ray tech is using as few words as possible and simply points and says they have to stay behind the wall. I completely agree but how? I try bribing the little one with snacks but he's 1 and keeps coming to me. X-ray tech getting irritated. DS5 trying his best to pin DS1 but it's just not happening and DS5 has autism so this is no small asknof him. Eventually the tech, without giving me the choice, takes the X-rays with both kids stood behind the bed (I couldn't see them and thought DS5 had manage to pin DS1). AIBU unreasonable to think we could have expected a tiny bit more help or is that standard?

Before anyone asks DH is on a business trip in another country and no one else could come with me.

Were you really sitting in a and e for 5 hours with a broken foot and a 5 year old and a 1 year old? Your kids must be angels.

broken foof

😂

YABU OP, as others have said the NHS is stretched to breaking point with barely enough staff to carry out procedures without having to babysit.

Gosh, this sounds so stressful and you've had quite a hard time of it on here too. Yes the NHS is stretched And that's why it happened. They SHOULD have called you after you specifically asked them to and could have asked somebody to hold the kids for 30 seconds ( it would probably have been quicker for them too) the hospital weren't awful probably just busy and overstretched but sending for your difficult day. Hope your foot's ok now?

The nhs is collapsing so keeping appropriatly checked staff on call for these situations is not an option, but in my experience staff try there utmost to help there patients. Did you actually ask if there was anyone available for a few minutes to help while you had the x-ray?

How did you get to hospital? I'm assuming taxi, could have asked driver to get the pushchair.
But that doesn't answer how you could get a 1 year old out of the house, to the hospital and mind them for 5 hours if you couldn't even get a pushchair out of your house? It doesn't make the slightest sense. It would have been 2 mins of painful effort to save 5 hours or more painful bigger effort!

Louiselouie0890

Best typo ever

I am sorry OP it is awful to navigate this alone

But I'm afraid yabu the pp are right it absolutely wasn't their job and actually I'd have done the same as above and slid the pushchair down

Have you had to deal with things like this alone before? Unfortunately I've sat in a and e with two DC far more than I would like and you get a back up bag with snack and nappies and drinks...never do it without a pushchair ( once when ds2 had cut his head open and I panicked at the blood and rushed him forgetting the pushchair and it was bloody murder)

I have sympathy but it's not remotely anything to do with the hospitals fault they are medical professionals not babysitters

Bloodynhell sounds like an awful situation for everyone !
A hospital isn't s place for kids to be honest and definitely should have had a pushchair even if that means asking taxi driver to get it for you (assuming you took a taxi!)

I imagine that faced with a broken foot, two small children and DH out of the country OP might not have had the calm and logical thought processes that might be available to someone who is, say, sitting at home behind a keyboard with a nice cup of tea and a biscuit.

Yes the NHS is overstretched but does that mean no one is allowed to have any fucking compassion for a woman in a difficult situation?

Hope you getting sorted now. Tbh id have posted on Facebook asking for help, someone would probably come forward,

I'm sorry you had such a horrible time. Also surprised that there isn't a bit more empathy on here. I hope you recover quickly.

@notapizzaeater really? You would have left your kids with complete strangers? Either for childcare or while you were seen?

@EyeSpyaBlueFoot it sounds like a really really shit situation and you are probably cranky,tired and hurting. But it's not the NHS's fault,some trusts really can't do more,as they barely have enough staff to cater for their patients much less their kids. At least it's done now,you were seen and sorted and hopefully you'll have a speedy recovery.

Definitely start building a support network though for the future.

@shadowcatt no I'd have hoped one of my friends / family had stepped up. If someone local to be me knowing them or not I would have offered to go with them to the hospital so nevr& in sole charge of the kids just to offer an hand

It actually helps to know what to expect culturally. I didn't sleep hardly at all last night from the pain and I wouldn't say I was at my most clear headed this morning. DS1 mostly prefers the carrier so the pushchair isn't something I think that much about. By this morning I couldn't put hardly any weight on that foot and the pain was making me feel sick. I did all I could to get us out the door and there with nappies and 75,000 snacks.

30 seconds of the tech smiling at DS1 and saying stand here with me or handing him post it note or anything really and the job would have been done. But that would appear to be well outside what is normal. I've only been to AE in this country twice both times with a baby in arms so carried him in the car seat. This was the first time I had to cope with it being me who needed help.

By the time we got back in the taxi I had a good old cry. I hate inconveniencing anyone else and social anxiety has always been a problem for me. I very clearly got it wrong and the expectation would be to wait it out until you can find adequate child care. At least I know.

Did I understand correctly? The X-ray was taken when the kids were next to you and not behind a protective screen?

Is that even allowed?

Sorry you had such a lousy experience. Is your foot broken?

Unfortunately it's the way the system works. Receptionist was out of order (did she really want two young kids running round for an extra hour ). X-ray tech would expect you to keep the kids under control. Tbh ur fortunate you only had to wait an hour in the queue. Here it's 4 hours.

I would not attempt a&e with kids. If it wasn't serious enough to get an ambulance I would wait. That's just how it is.

Yes they could have helped you. It literally takes seconds for a nurse or even an admin person to stand outside room with one year old and would probably have saved time. I am always amazed by number of people who think all parents have a handy list of emergency childcare on tap.

I've worked in NHS. Also in a medical centre. I've often went above and beyond to help parents when they're struggling, be it carrying things to their car, keeping one DC amused while the parent takes the other in for vaccines etc. Heck, I even delivered prescriptions to a patients house when I finished work as I was aware her husband wasn't around, she had no friends/family near by, had two very young kids and her car had broken down that morning.

However, I was in no way obligated to do this. I only managed to go above and beyond when I wasn't completely rushed off my feet due to staff shortages (or when I didn't have to cover other aspects of medical centre life due to meetings/double bookings to get all patients squeezed into clinics etc).

I have stacks of empathy for those who are struggling. However, I have zero empathy when parents EXPECT it and make a public rant stating that she thinks the staff 'should have done more'.

I am sorry you had such a hard time.
I have used sitters.co.uk they often can find someone at short notice and the sitters i have had have been great.
How are you now? What did they find?

YANBU, I don't see what you could have done in the circumstances. Building a network can take years.

Sorry you had such an awful time OP. Going against the grain YANBU to expect a little more of the receptionist, after you specifically asked. You are also NBU to expect the X-ray tech to show a little compassion and at least waited while you tried to get your DC to stay behind the wall.

A few NHS staff do seem to use the excuse that they are overworked etc as an excuse to get away with being quite rude and dismissive, and can show lack of compassion. Sorry you seemed to encounter a couple of these personalities and there was no one more helpful available. There is no way I would have coped at A&E in your situation, especially with no buggy.

Dear EyeSpyABlueFoot, just ignore all the people who are telling you this was acceptable, because it wasn't. I've worked in the NHS, and I am sorry to say that there have always been grumpy staff who use 'busyness' as an excuse to be unpleasant. It takes no time at all to smile and be reassuring.

Please complain to the Patient Advice and Liaison Service at the hospital. They exist to improve services by listening to suggestions. For example, many hospitals have volunteers (WRVS etc) who will assist in situations like this.

YABU. If you are at A&E then there is a possibility you will be admitted. You would need a plan for DC then and so should have had one before going at all. Not easy but probably needs thinking through for future ref espec if your DH is away a lot.

Hope the foot is not too serious.

@howabout you're not going to be admitted for a broken foot.

imnotreally that is kind of the point obliquely. The treatment for broken foot is rest, strapping and painkillers generally. More of a GP / minor injuries unit situation than a trip to A&E. My original point still stands that you need a backup for real emergencies if you are in sole charge of 2 small DC.