To think Claire's should not be piercing the ears of a hysterical 13 month old whilst she is held down?

[ScottishG]

I was in Claire's Accessories with dd today. A small child was crying hysterically. I looked around to see what was going on and was horrified to see a baby being forced to have her ears pierced. She was being firmly held on an adult 's knee (? mum) surrounded by 3 or 4 men who seemed to be with her and the assistant doing the piercing. Her ears were held by the adults whilst they were pierced. It was horrible. She was so upset it was distressing to see.
I have no clue why anyone would put their baby through this and think it is wrong to hurt your child in this way. However, I also felt Claire's were wrong to go ahead with the piercing when the child was so very distressed. Surely they could have refused to continue? I can't get the scene out of my head and Dr(13) was upset too.

Cultural covers a lot of sins.
There are people in my family believe it's cultural and harm their babies too.
It isn't though, they just do it and say it's cultural.
also, even if it is cultural you can choose not to do it, nothing in any culture is compulsory.
I often wonder if someone would remove their babies ears entirely if it was deemed cultural.
It's barbaric and abuse.

6yo DD recently got her ears done at a piercing studio using disposable cartridges. They had the earring in one side and the back in the other on a sliding track, earlobe goes in the gap between the two and then the piercer gently but quickly squeezed the two ends together. Job done. She had both ears done at the same time, no loud bang or jolt, and she didn't even cry or flinch. It was far cheaper than Claire's and the piercer took the time to speak to her before/during/after, getting her permission for each step and explaining it. I was told to take her straight back if there are any problems but so far they're healing nicely with no scabbing or redness and she says they haven't hurt at all.

When I was ten years old my mum made me get my ears pierced even though I really didn't want it done. I'd told her repeatedly that I didn't want them done but she'd continuously say that every other girl in my class had it done and I'd end up being the odd one out. Got it done, barely wore earrings after a short while and now don't wear them at all. I always swore I'd never make my kids get it done if they didn't want it done.

I just don't understand why anyone would want to put their child through unnecessary pain, especially when they're so young and cannot possibly consent...

i was 12 before i had mine pierced! i think its awful doing it to babies.. especially if they are that distressed, poor darling didn't even understand :(

ok i appreciate some cultures do this at that's fine, but majority i see have no reason to other than a fashion statement. THAT disgusts me.

I don’t care if it’s “cultural” or if it’s the done thing in “your country”.

People who get babies’ ears pierced in the U.K. are chavs. Simple as that.

You might as well just write the word CHAV across the child’s forehead with a permanent marker.

Yeah I think it’s vile and I judge
Yet more reinforcement for females as adornments rather than valued human beings
Males don’t have aesthetic decisions made for them at that tender age
But hey, let’s hurt a girl who can’t argue so she can look ‘pretty’
What a crock

Thats horrible doing that to that poor wee girl :( when my dp's took older dsis to spain when she was a baby the spanish ladies thought she was a boy because she didnt have her ears pierced

I don’t understand how this can be legal when slapping a child so that it leaves a mark is illegal.

Both are inflicting pain on a child.

Wiggy why do you think it’s fine that some cultures do this. Just because it’s “cultural” doesn’t make it any less painful or abusive.

Female circumcision is cultural but we don’t agree that is fine.

It’s horrid and very common - nothing short of abuse. Wait until the child is old enough to give informed consent - about 14 as a minimum.

Cultural or fashion statement, it's abuse either way. If all of your family members beat their kids, would you do the same because they had? I've always hated it because it looks horrendous, but reading this thread has made me realise it is a form of child abuse and there should definitely be an age limit, although I suppose that wouldn't stop people doing it themselves at home which is even scarier

If it's abuse why isn't it illegal?

It should be illegal and in time I think it will be. I remember having mine pierced and it hurts considerably more than immunisations. If your young child didn’t appear in pain whilst getting their ears pierced with a gun I would be worried ablout their lack of appropriate pain response.
Causing pain to a child because for beauty is wrong. I judge.

just trying to be respectful here lol hate to offend too much!

I didn’t get my ears pierced till I was 11. Gun piercing. 9ct gold studs.

Kicked off a lifelong severe nickel allergy. My white gold wedding ring put me in hospital. I don’t wear any jewellery now.

There’s research showing a ten-gold increase in nickel allergy amongst females - and they all have pierced ears.

7 year old DD asked to have hers done. The only way that is happening is with a pro-piercer and implant grade titanium studs. He won’t do it under-10, so she’s not getting it done till at least then.

Pitching by a baby’s ears is abusive IMO. There’s the lack of consent, the pain and also the risk of a lifelong allergy.

And for the record I am not a certain class as another poster said. I am a different culture but that doesn't make me another class

What is the cultural benefit of inflicting pain on babies? For what cultural reason is it considered right for babies to suffer the pain of having their ears pierced? I am genuinely interested. Is it on par with female genital mutilation? IE for no reason really other than its "a traditional custom"? Why does FM or ear piercing benefit the child?

It’s a butchery trend - but like saying “would of”.

*a bit

I totally agree with the 'Don't go to Claire's' advice here.

I have many ear piercings (I'm in my 50s - still adding them!) but where I live my piercer isn't allowed by law to pierce with a needle under the age of 16. (Which may also have been the issue with the piercing studio someone else mentioned recommended Claire's - they probably aren't allowed to do under-16s either, and probably don't take any pleasure in recommending anywhere that uses a gun.)

He says that when he's questioned the local licencing rules he's been accused of 'Just wanting to take business away from other piercers who use guns'. Well, yes - but not because he's jealous, but because it's wrong to use a gun - and you can't sterilise them properly, Claire's don't have autoclaves, whereas piercing studios do.

And - for those who think it hurts with a needle - it really doesn't hurt for more than a few seconds. I've had it done both ways (lobes done twice with a gun in the days before I discovered the joys of more adventurous ear piercing!) and my lobes throbbed for at least 3 or 4 hours after having them done with a gun. By comparison I've not even been aware of my helix piercings by the time I've settled the bill and walked out of the door 10 minutes later! (Although you do have to be careful sleeping on them for the first week or so, and spray with saline twice a day)

That's another thing - Claire's and their 'healing drops'. They charge for those, don't they as a condition of piercing? But you only need sterile saline (you can make your own, but it's easy and cheap to get a a small bottle at any chemist). Whatever Claire's might say, they can't speed up the healing process! And if Claire's are really charging £50 you're being robbed - £35 where I go, with individual attention, an APP accredited piercer (they work hard for that accreditation) a bed to lie on, a piercer using a face mask and two changes of sterile gloves, autoclaved instruments, titanium (surgical grade) jewellery, and a check-up any time you want one for free.

I know it's not easy to resist the pester-power, but if you can possibly manage it, I would only ever recommend piercing with a needle with an APP piercer!

I increasingly think all forms of physical modification - piercings, tattoos, circumcision - should be for adults only because even among older children, meaningful consent is a grey area.

I would call it child abuse. Although it's not legally recognised as such. Babies should not have their ears pierced. It's so wrong. They're not fashion accessories, they're human beings, and if you want to dress something up, get a doll. I also don't understand the cultural thing. I feel as though it should be illegal in any country until the age of at least 11 or so. When the child has the ability to make the decision themselves and the parent agrees.

@SchnitzelVonKrumm completely agree. I think circumcision is barbaric. Absolutely horrific to put your child through that for any reason other than it's medically necessary. People who circumcise their child completely disgust me and I believe that they don't deserve to be parents.

@tulipbee a delicate name for someone so hairy of hand.

Excuse me ?

@MrsFrankDrebin they sell cheaper earrings but don't recommend them in children. Which tbh doesn't make sense does it? Also they now sell a solution which claims to heal faster meaning you can change the piercings in 3 weeks instead of 6. Which tbh I find worrying.

Piercer I had my helix done at sold me a solution spray - me and my friend went halves and she had a nasty reaction to it. She also said she'd do a nose piercing with a gun. This is the one who said take your kid to Claire's.

Actually the laws on piercing age of anything but lobes has recently tightened up so probably right that they can't pierce on under 16yos.

Piercer I recently got a quote from said £25 per lobe piercing which makes it just as expensive as Claire's. But probably implant grade titanium instead of silver/gold.

My dd started asking to have her ears pierced when she was 6. I made her wait a year. She watched all the YouTube videos and knew exactly what to expect and managed all her aftercare herself. Eldest dd is 11 and also wants her ears pierced. But she has autism and adhd and had bad hygiene habits so I made her wait until her hygiene improved.

Hard to set an arbitrary age but agree they should be able to verbally state it's what they want.