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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU us or the woman?

14 replies

Clandestino · 11/08/2018 21:13

DH and me went to a shop today to grab a laundry bag. Waiting in a queue a woman suddenly appears and pushes in straight in front of us.
DH tells her: Oh, we are also waiting. The woman who I only then saw was heavily pregnant starts sounding very upset and goes on with a long explanation how she was standing there, look she even has an item she left there near the counter but why don't we just go first.
We both apologised, told her no, of course she goes first and look, the cashier is waving at her to come and pay.
She went to the cashier and continued her rant about "some awful people", passing her by I just apologised again. As an answer she shouted "You are SO ignorant!"
DH who hates mingling with the shopping crowd is rather upset as he doesn't understand where he was ignorant if he apologised at least three times for the misunderstanding.
I told him she was pregnant (even though we didn't see it first), hormonal, tired and that's where you have the moments a dead fly brings you to tears and every slight is multiplied by at least a hundred. At least that's how it was for me and maybe I was just one of the unlucky few.
So who was BU, us for not spotting she was queuing in front of us even though she wasn't there when we came or her for deciding to ignore the apologies and just obsess with what started it?

OP posts:
TedAndLola · 11/08/2018 21:16

Her.

But it's a non-event; stop worrying about it!

BonnieLass5 · 11/08/2018 21:19

Obviously she was being unreasonable but you’re weird for overthinking this.

And pregnancy is not an excuse to be rude.

isseywithcats · 11/08/2018 21:20

pregnancy dosent give you entitlement to just push in front of people, if she had left the qeue then she should have waited till you were served thats the risk you take if you walk away, she was being unreasonable and i for one wouldnt have let her in or apologised

FissionChips · 11/08/2018 21:22

I don’t know how you kept your cool, after she’d shouted I would’ve probably said some terrible things to her so she had a proper reason to cry.

Clandestino · 11/08/2018 21:22

Ted, I don't, it's my husband who doesn't get it and it still weighs on him heavily. I told him to stop worrying about it but he keeps coming back to him being "ignorant", I feel sorry for him.

OP posts:
BettySpagBol · 11/08/2018 21:24

No one ever suggested I queue Jumped when pregnant and I wouldnt have dreamt of asking unless I felt ill I guess.

One time I was served in primary and the cashier saw my bump and said next time skip the queue and come straight to the till. I said I would feel a real dick doing that

Clandestino · 11/08/2018 21:26

Fission, DH usually hates conflicts and I just put it down to hormones and didn't want to escalate the whole situation. Pick your battles is my motto.

OP posts:
Emilizz34 · 11/08/2018 21:27

Sounds to me like she was but don’t waste your energy dwelling on it . There are some strange people out there . Some time ago , I was queuing in Boots with my niece who was in a buggy . A woman just pushed in front of me with a huge basket . When I pointed out that she had skipped the queue , she went on a huge rant about people dragging their kids around shops when they should be at home giving them quality time !!

Stroller15 · 11/08/2018 21:27

I'm 35 weeks pregnant, moved house today with a 2yr old toddler and dh working till 11pm tonight so feeling very sorry for myself. Still won't jump a queue.

YANBU.

Clandestino · 11/08/2018 21:30

Betty in all fairness I believed her she was standing there before as she grabbed the item left there. A short "sorry, I was queuing here before, just forgot something" when she returned would have been enough in our eyes. I don't mind letting pregnant women ahead of me at all, even though I myself have never felt entitled to priority service due to pregnancy.

OP posts:
KittyHawke80 · 11/08/2018 21:40

She is. Stupid woman. ‘You’re so ignorant!’ is such a stupid fucking overused meaningless phrase as well, trotted out by the profoundly stupid to try and win an argument precisely no one else is having. Ignorant of what? The gross national product of Belgium? The starting line-up of the LA Lakers in the mid 90s? Of the fact she left some sort of place-marking item near a checkout - not a thing, btw - and anyway your bloke shouldn’t have said anything because she’s the first fucker in the world to have a baby? I’d’ve lost it at that point. She should’ve accepted your very gracious apology graciously, because you hadn’t actually done anything wrong, and shut her bloody trap.

Clandestino · 11/08/2018 22:01

Thank you for the replies. In all fairness it was a non-event but that's easier to say then to apply.
At least we have a new family phrase. "You are sooo ignorant!" said in a very accusatory and hurt tone.

OP posts:
Returnofthesmileybar · 11/08/2018 22:08

Spaces in queues don't wait for you, if she wanted to do that she should at least said "sorry do you mind me popping back in, I was here I just went back for something i forgot", she was very rude

Apehouse · 12/08/2018 07:10

I really hate it when people dump a basket beside the till and think they’ve reserved a space

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