Tipping is not the done thing.

[Lyndaishistory]

You are not expected to tip in the UK! I'm not sure why some people think otherwise.
I would only tip if service was above and beyond but it is not an expectation and I wouldn't "cave" if it was crap service.

Husband and I had a rubbish meal at a well known resturant chain for our anniversary. I complained at the time but nothing was done about it.
Left husband to pay the bill and he tipped them. Bloody hell, I want my fiver back!
Seriously considering LTB over this.

In the US I understand the need to tip but can't afford to go their

It is not customary in the UK, and would not tip, unless the service was bad. In the US we tiiped, well if the service was good, none, if the service was bad.

Meant would not tip in the UK, unless the service was good not bad. Doh

I don't tip as a rule. The prices in most restaurants is so high, they are making a big enough profit as it is. I don't actually think the tips go to the staff half the time anyway. Tip taxi drivers, but that's it. I couldn't stand the attitude in the US, so don't intend to visit. I have never tipped hairdressers either.

My mum was a waitress in the 30's.

It was a part-time job as outside restaurant hours she was "in service" to the owners (a B&B with a small restaurant). She was pregnant when she was sent there and worked virtually until my brother's birth.

She taught me to tip as tipping was her only income. Her job was as a house maid so she was up at 5 setting fires, heating water etc. for guests and owners. She did the laundry and cleaning before going on shift as a waitress. She'd be lucky to be in bed by 11 most nights and was relieved to be taken on by a munitions factory when the War came (despiite the dangers). She wasn't paid as she was given "free" board and meals!

Her tips would pay for her weekend home once a month and daily living needs.

Times have changed, though. Minimum wage means that people no longer live off tips like my mum did, but tipping is part of our culture so I still do.

I dislike service charges and always tip in cash - I tip for the service from the person who waited my table. I also always make up the tip for friends who refuse to. I've given up asking for their share even though they earn more than me.

My experience of wait staff has been wide - I was a barmaid and waitress while at uni. I'm chatty and tend to ask how they've come to their jobs. A lot are students, some are lifers that started as waitresses and have actually enjoyed their jobs. Increasingly I'm seeing older women waiting as a living after divorce. I've even come across a young woman who worked in the nursing profession who waited part-time to pay for a divorce her STBX wasn't expecting.

My point is that the person bringing you your dinner tonight might be writing your prescription in a few years so don't judge. My mum went from humble beginnings to owning a successful business - but never forgot to tip.

itsalldyingout

Thank you for your thoughts. I don't think anyone is judging someone working as bar staff/waitress etc. It's a job and I've never looked down on anyone in a customer facing role.

itsalldyingout, I find your post really quite patronising. Tip/over-tip if you want but do it for yourself not to make up 'perceived shortcomings' from your fellow diners. It's really high-handed of you and not your place to do that, do it in your own name.

Everybody has their reasons for needing money and waiting staff are not special. What about caring staff needing money for their divorce? Your mum's situation was common way back then but now that NMW is established, the scenario is irrelevant.

I have no problem with you or anybody else tipping or not tipping, but act for yourself not for others please. They are not doing anything wrong by not tipping and don't need you 'mopping up' behind them.

Your mum’s situation was common way back then but now that NMW is established, the scenario is irrelevant.

Wow! Did you miss the bit about being pregnant and working an 18 hour day! You are all heart!

however when you're at a self service buffet restaurant, the waiting staff have barely done anything except get you a drink....yet they still expect a tip.

Because it is legal to pay less than minimum wage because of the expectation of tipping.

And that's not just the server, it is the busser, the kitchen staff etc. The server has to tip the other staff regardless of whether you tip them. Not entirely sure but I think they also get taxed on their tips.

Servers can end up paying to work.

Some US chains tried it here, they were not allowed to.

I have asked to remove the service charge, it was a hotel bar in London, the staff were crp and 15% on every drink that was already over priced I was not going to pay.

A friend of mine is bemused by me tipping, she claims it is a habit I picked up in London.

User, are you the same 'user' that always has a pop at me?

I said that the scenario wasn't the same now as there is NMW when there wasn't then. It's not relevant because it's not the same, there is help now that wasn't available back then.

Don't presume to know anything about me.

Why are some posters saying that tipping in the UK is a new thing, or a custom brought in from the USA? I'm 65 and have been tipping waiting staff for over 40 years.

@Lyndaishistory

I 'felt free' enough to read all your posts as the thread was going along thank you.

Your stance seems to be the same, that you feel tipping is not the 'done thing' in the UK and you shouldn't have to do it. However it is the done thing in the UK for many restaurants and is not exactly a new practice.

A few customers used to think they could hide their dislike of tipping but it came across clearly and you could tell they hated doing it. The looks you were given as a waitress when you gave them the bill and one person would often snatch back some coins off the table because they thought the other person had left too much. Your posts and tone on this thread make me believe that you are like these people, I sincerely hope I am wrong.

@OliviaStabler

Thank you for your judgement. Have a good night.

Lynda - one of the early posters was rather unpleasant about waiting staff. Her post now deleted.

Lying - wow. Patronising and high-handed. And there's me thinking it gave a bit of insight to how long tipping has been around for posters who didn't realise it wasn't a new-ish thing.

I tip to make up the 10% as I believe in tipping for good service, not to mop up after friends. We meet at the same restaurant a lot. They used to tip but now believe it is not a thing. They're younger than me and don't have experience working in service industries. We have the same waitress every time and she thanks us for the tip. She's not young and works really hard and gives us excellent service.

Btw, I actually did mention that tipping isn't actually a necessity due to the minimum wage but my post seems to have rattled your cage somewhat.

So many tight wads. Restaurants introduce service charges because people don’t tip!!! It’s not a new thing in this country I think it’s very poor etiquette not to tip unless you have had an appalling waiting staff. Service is sometimes dictated to by other things.

As someone who work for many years as a Silver server and behind a bar. I only ever tip for good service and I’ve asked for service charges to been removed from my bill if I don’t think it’s been up to standard.

So many tight wads. Restaurants introduce service charges because people don’t tip!!!

This is true actually.

When I used to be a waitress the policy was that staff could add on a discretionary service charge for tables of six or more. This was because big tables were often a lot of work and they were also the highest risk tables in terms of not tipping. (You'll always get some people carefully calculating what they had and adding something on for a tip, and then some arsehole at the end saying, "I'll just pay the £3 what's left then, shall I?" and practically getting a free meal out of it.) It's too easy for non tippers to hide in a big group.

But now the service charge seems to be applied everywhere.

So, if service charges annoy you, you have the stingy non tippers to thank for it.

OhYeah the people who not only don’t tip but avoid the bill as well

So many tight wads. Restaurants introduce service charges because people don’t tip!!!

This is what I don't understand about tipping. Why not just charge more and do away with the convention of tipping?

I do tip in restaurants before I'm accused of being one of the tight wads.

Treaclesoda

I kind of agree with you, but tipping and service charges allow restaurants to look cheaper than they really are. Any restaurant that put up its prices and displayed a 'no tips/service charge' policy would almost certainly lose customers because most people would only see higher prices: yes, people really aren’t all that bright.

Restaurants also like tips because it allows them toaccept cash 'off the books', which is a great way to avoid paying tax on a good chunk of their income.

It also allows some to top up staff wages which would otherwise be below minimum wage threshold. Not sure if new laws didn’t address this loophole, but it certainly used to be an issue.

I think it’s very poor etiquette not to tip

Happy to tip but not if the manager/owner pockets most of the tips themselves, or forces them to be shared. I tip the person who serves me. I'm not keen on someone else sharing their tip who may not be very good. And I'm even less keen on the owner taking a massive cut.

@runningkeenster the pub I used to work at, all the tips were put into a jar and shared out between all staff members, even the owner who never lifted a finger during service, just sat at the bar with family and friends chatting.
Although I do always tip, unless service is dire, it makes me very wary of tipping in small family run pubs as I always think you're probably not even going to see 50p of this tip!

I've already said that I tip for excellent service. Mostly it isn't. I don't believe in shrapnel-tips, I tip well.

I don't judge anybody for rewarding mediocrity but I won't do it myself. Do what you like, I don't watch what other people do and really don't care. All the name-calling is from the ardent tippers-for-any-service.

The whole reason some countries tip is because of the lack of minimum wage, where waiters and waitresses earn around 2 dollars an hour. In the UK they get paid minimum wage, just the same as shop assistants, hairdressers, bartenders etc… so why tip them? We do tend to leave a 5% tip but if service was average/poor and we don’t feel valued by the server, then we don’t tip.