Replaced photograph

[Firsttimer1234]

Me and hubby got married last year and a month or so after we got two picture blown up and professionally framed for his parents, at their request and our expense. One was of the two of us and one was a family shot with hubbies side of the family. Went to the house last week and noticed that they had taken one of the picture out of the frame and replaced it with a picture of hubbies sister (their daughter) and her new girlfriend. Now if they didn't want the picture up for whatever reason then that's fine just put it in a cupboard or even bin it! But to take the picture out and replace it with a picture of someone else, surely that really rude and disrespectful? Feel like asking for the bloody frames back!

Perhaps they felt it was rude not to acknowledge their daughter's relationship but wanted matching frames?

They weren't matching frames

Not something that would bother me really. They wanted a picture of their other child with their partner and they look better in matching frames.

TBH it doesn't sound like a big deal to me, and that they wanted their kids to have equal footing. Were the frames expensive? Maybe you could ask if they want you to pick up a third frame so that they can have the family portrait back.

I would imagine they wanted to acknowledge their daughter and partner but wanted to keep the matching frames up? I wouldn’t get too worked up over it.

cross post

Not matching frames. Ok, couldn’t be arsed buying another frame?

Which picture have thy replaced ? If it is the family photo then they probably wanted a picture of their son and his wife and their DD and her partner in matching frames. You gave them the photos and the frames as gifts. people can do what they like with gifts, you have no claim on them any more.

Maybe. The thing is, when you buy people a gift it’s then theirs to do what they want with. Maybe they’ll put the other picture up elsewhere at some point? Maybe they just didn’t like the second picture. Honestly I really couldn’t bring myself to be too bothered about this.

YANBU - this is just weird and yep, rude. Get another frame for the new photo! Weird.

My daughter (7) bought her best friend a frame and put a pic of them together for a birthday gift. A while later she saw it with her friend and another mate in.....ouch!

Unless it's been put elsewhere, I would just take the frame back as it was a set with the photo of you and evidently they don't want it now. It appears no love is lost.

"Hubby" - shudder.

They just wanted two pictures of their two children with their significant others. I don't think it's weird to use a frame you already have. Putting it in a cupboard or the bin instead of reusing the frame is more weird!

Would people seriously take a gift back that they’d given to someone because they’re not using it in the exact way they wanted it to be used?
The fact is that people won’t always like gifts you give them. Some people will use them in a different way, or not use them at all, or even give them away. Did you see the thread about Boots 3 for 2 gift sets?! You can’t dictate how a present is used, and take it back if it isn’t to your liking. That’s crazy.

@bluelady commenting useless, inappropriate comments on a post when some is asking for advice/help-Shudder
If you don't want to comment anything helpful why do you not bother commenting at all?

Would people seriously take the frame back ? It was a gift. I can't imagine walking into someone's house and saying 'i see you have put a photo of your DD and her GF in the frame I gave you, so I'd like the frame back' You;d sound like a crazy person. I think I'd just say 'lovely pic of DSIL and her partner' and not give it another thought. Its nto something to make abig deal over. Sometimes a frame is just a frame and not a symbol for an irretreviably destroyed, lets all go no contact, family breakdown.

Some people love fanning flames just so they can watch the bonfire from a safe and uninvolved distance. But you are the one who will be getting burnt.

They probably just wanted photos of their children and partners in the same frame?

It's a bit odd I guess as they were a gift from you but I don't think it's worth getting upset over.

Which picture did they replace? The one of you and him or the one with his family?

If they weren't matching frames, which picture have they replaced? The family photo? Yab a little U. They clearly want the two you you to share equal walk space. If it's the photo of the two of you, ask them why.

My in laws are always changing their photos around. We've got 4 dc, bil has 1. We don't give it a second thought as to who has more wall coverage.

If you are disgruntled I suspect there is a deeper issue about your sister being more favoured that needs exploring.

I don't get why you'd rather them bin the photo but not use the frame for a different photo of someone else.

The thing that has annoyed me more than anything is that we paid for them professionally framing and mounting and the fact it's the picture of me and hubby that they have replaced. Not the whole family one. So no they don't want picture of each child with their partners because since they replaced me and hubby there's only sister and partner now. So can someone explain the logic now?

it's the picture of me and hubby that they have replaced.

1. You should've started with this
2. They're dicks.
3. Do they have form for this?

Nor do I. Surely once you give someone a gift it's theirs to do with what they wish? As for taking a present back ...do people really do something like that?

I agree with lavende I think they wanted to acknowledge both relationships and it was easier to alter one frame. I really wouldn't read too much into it. Did you mention it when you were there?

Perhaps they thought enough time had elapsed between receiving the wedding pictures and swapping photos to not hurt anyone's feelings. I agree with pp, I expect your in-laws just liked the idea of matching photo frames.
(If SIL and her partner split up, you will probably find your wedding photo re-emerges).