Replaced photograph

[Firsttimer1234]

Me and hubby got married last year and a month or so after we got two picture blown up and professionally framed for his parents, at their request and our expense. One was of the two of us and one was a family shot with hubbies side of the family. Went to the house last week and noticed that they had taken one of the picture out of the frame and replaced it with a picture of hubbies sister (their daughter) and her new girlfriend. Now if they didn't want the picture up for whatever reason then that's fine just put it in a cupboard or even bin it! But to take the picture out and replace it with a picture of someone else, surely that really rude and disrespectful? Feel like asking for the bloody frames back!

Are you in the family shot? Because if so, it'll be that they now have a photo of everyone and partners....

I'll be honest with you here, not many people want a picture of just the bride and groom in their home other than the bride and groom.... I don't see any problem

It’s not any old bride and groom though it’s their son and his wife!
I would be miffed in your place but once something has been given as s gift you can’t control the use of it. It’s rude of them but it would be even ruder if you to mention it.

@getfitmumma that would be fine but they replaced it with a photo of the other couple, I don’t think they excuse works.

Have they perhaps just forgotten that it was you who gave them the frames? I often give me parents lovely gifts and a few months later have forgotten it exists or it was me who gave it to them. They're not even old they just don't care that much. It's annoying but it's just a frame, don't let it upset you.

I reckon SIL has complained there weren't any pictures of her and GF up. Presumably you and H are in the whole family shot but new GF isn't. They are trying to please everyone is my bet while still wanting only 2 pictures with matching frames.

You've got two choices. You can bring it up and I BET you will make MIL cry and say she can't do right for doing wrong or you can let it float over you and forget about it (I don't think I'm being v subtle about which I think you should do).

I would be a bit miffed too, but you can't ask for the frame back - that would be far ruder. So I guess you just leave it and have a rant to your DH!

Assuming you're both in the family shot, it seems to make sense that they would keep the photo with you, DH AND family, no?

Unless they only kept a pic that didn't have you in it I really don't see what you're upset about.

Does the photo of SIL and her partner mean she now has everyone on the wall?
Whether you understand the logic or agree with it is neither here nor there. It was a gift. You cannot demand it back because they haven’t used it as you would have liked. Well you can, but you’d look seriously batshit.

Did you anything?

Sorry, did you SAY anything?

THEY ARE NOT MATCHING FRAMES

Hopefully that will stop this point being made every other post.

You say they requested the photographs - was it "can we have a couple of pics?", which wouldn't necessarily imply all the expense of framing and mounting, or was it "Can you give us a couple of framed and mounted pictures?"
I could see your point if they specifically requested that you spend money on a frame and mounting, but if they didn't, I really think you're being a bit odd. Lots of people don't like too many framed photos knocking around - they're very cluttering - and lots of parents know that it's important to be even-handed with kids by either having photographs of all of them with partners, or none.
Perhaps they can't afford (or don't want to spend the money on) professional framing and mounting for the sister and her GF, so are repurposing what they've already got.
To be honest, I'd find it tiresome to have to mollify you over this - unless they specifically requested framed/mounted pictures, in which case I could slightly see your point (but I'd still just let it go).

How new is the new girlfriend?

@Bellyscreen
From my understanding SIL partner is not in the family photo??? But OP is.... So now everyone is in a photo in the house....

I don't under the fuss?

blown up?

How big were they?

You should have - still could - ask them why. Maybe the daughter did it?

But whatever the reason, to remove your wedding portrait from the frame you bought and replace it with another couple's picture is staggeringly rude. I know many posters like to play devil's advocate, but come on. None of you would be fine with this.

Ask! Send a text if you don't want to call.

From my understanding SIL partner is not in the family photo??? But OP is.... So now everyone is in a photo in the house....

And they had to be in that one particular frame, that the OP and her DH gave as a gift to mark their wedding?

It would have been more acceptable to remove the group photo, not the one of the couple.

They could have just taken it down, used a different frame and picture but what a waste of a frame. Don't most people reuse picture frames when they want an update?

I wouldn't read too much into it, I'd conclude they really loved the frames but just changed their minds about the photos. Maybe yours look really special and they want to make sure siblings are equally represented in images around their house.

Let me be clearer:
We got some picture framed and mounted and they commented how much they liked them and that they would love some too.
We said we would get them two done as a gift and asked them to pick the pictures, the specifically picked the two picture, one a family shot of hubby and their family, I am not in the picture! And one of just me and hubby on the beach. The frames were not matching, at their request because they are placed on a large bay window with lots of frames, in a scartted approach all un matching. The girlfriend is of a month or so, not that I think this is relevant. They have replaced the picture of me and hubby , not the family one. Every family member is now depicted somewhere in the house, apart from me. They saw hubby looking at the time and quickly and in a very embarrassed way say 'oh we don't have any pictures of x and x up'. Surprisingly enough there's now no pictures of me and hubby up.

Op, I'm with you, it's really rude and I'd be totally miffed.

Well then fair enough, YANBU to be pissed off that you now no longer feature in any of the photos. They obviously have some sort of issue with you. But what can you do? It was a gift, you cannot demand it back.

I would be cross too and would probably not be able to stop myself making a sarcastic comment along the lines of 'oh I'm so glad we spent all that money on that photo which you have ditched!'...

I think it's odd.
They asked for a couple of wedding photos to put in display.
Ok had paid for this.
They then take down the picture of the bride and groom and replace it with a photo of their dd and her girlfriend - no definitely odd.

I think I'd ask for it back and say "I see you aren't using the photo I had done for you, in that case my lovely great aunt/grandma/insert name of someone they unlikely to come into contact with and who is old and frail, would love to have that picture so may I have it back?"

What they have done is weird and rude.

Yup..still dicks. Wonder how PP's will manage to still twist your update into a non issue.