To ask for positive breastfeeding stories?

[Tallpinetrees]

I'm currently pregnant with my first and obviously keen to get as much information as possible to be prepared. I've been asked if I'm going to give breastfeeding a try, and I hope so!

A couple of people have told me their birth "horror" stories, which were quite scary, but I really enjoyed reading Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth and all the stories of women confidently and quietly (or not so quietly!) giving birth.

AIBU to ask for some encouraging and inspiring stories about breastfeeding?

I also wanted to add - have fed in public LOADS and never had any comments from anyone. Also, I never bought specific nursing clothes other than bras.

And as someone else said - I used to hate my breasts. I feel much more positive about them now!

@WineandTiramisu my baby refused bottles of EBM when he was that little too. We swapped to a Tommie Tippee ‘closer to nature’ teat (the slowest flow one) and he’d take a bit from that. Then at 6m when we started weaning he kind of got the hang of it as he was having bits of water from cups and sippy cups. Now at 11m he’ll drink milk from a bottle or a cup, so don’t panic that the refusal is forever. (Baby still prefers a boob to anything else mind!)

I come from a family where bottle feeding is very much the norm, my mother thought breastfeeding was a sign of me being a martyr and totally unnecessary! All I found before DD was born was horror stories.

DD was born, 10 days overdue after a really tough delivery. As I was very ill first saw her 6 hours after delivery. I was distraught at having missed the “golden hour” and thought we’d never establish feeding. However she latched immediately, I never had any pain. Milk came in on day 3 in a textbook fashion and I had enough milk to feed 3 babies! She slept 6 hours at night from 4 weeks and 8hours from 8 weeks. The only problem I had was that she would not take a bottle. Tried from 3 weeks when I thought they were too small to refuse and she just never took to it. But it was fine, we continued breastfeeding after I went back to work full time and eventually stopped at 2.5 years. Hoping it’s as easy next time!

It just came naturally to me (the only baby-related thing that did), and I used to find myself hiding in toilets to feed on the ward as the midwives kept messing with the latch saying it was wrong. Well yah boo sucks to them - no cracked nipples, no problems at all and I fed for 10 months until he decided he didn't want to breastfeed any more. I think the thing is I had to position him a bit differently to other people due to having massive boobs that could have suffocated him.

It would be a bit painful momentarily as he'd start sucking, but then fine - and in those first few weeks it was the way I felt about him when I was feeding (overwhelming love - probably hormonally-induced) that kept me going, because the rest of it was pure hard slog.

I second all those people who say don't think about doing anything else in the first couple of weeks. Not due to the feeding, but due to just general baby-stuff. Life was feed-based for me for about 5 months, but then much better as in the olden days we began food at four months.

I never had any pain, it’s not a given. After the 1st week of being in hospital (she was slightly prem so it took us a bit of practice) my dd finally latched on and I never looked back. I loved feeding her and it’s one of my favourite memories of her babyhood. There’s nothing like seeing your tiny newborn become a bouncing 6mo and thinking ‘that was all from my body’. The nightfeeds can be hard at the time, but I made them something positive for me by making sure I had a good book (downloaded on a kindle for easier holding) so that every feed I’d be looking forward to the next chapter and although I was exhausted I look back on those times as nice too. It would be a luxury to have hours to read now with a toddler! I’m expecting no. 2 soon and the main thing I’m looking forward to again is feeding!

I really struggled with DC1&2 and I didn’t BF them for as long as DC3. They both struggled with latch, I had bleeding nipples and was absolutely exhausted so just wanted someone else to step in for a while and help. It’s not a walk in the park if there are latch problems and you will need a lot of support with that.

DC3, on the other hand, just sort of got it straight away. No issues with latch, didn’t even need my nipple cream... she just grasped it and fed until she was 14 months old when she naturally weaned. I didn’t do anything differently whatsoever, I suppose it’s just easier for some babies than others.

Definitely invest in Lansinoh nipple cream, it is amazing. Get an electric breast pump and some bottles so your OH can help you feed sometimes. Get really decent breast pads as you will leak A LOT. Don’t be afraid to ask for help from the midwives/health visitors. Don’t take shit from anyone else about breast milk not being enough and needing to top up with formula, it’s BS. Good luck.

I fed both my children until they were 1.
Eldest was 16mth and I was pregnant when I stop. Youngest was bang on the 12 month as she wasn’t going to wean gradually had to be cold turkey.

It can be tricky, painful and frustrating.
Lanisoh cream for sore nipples and silicone covers rather than the pads to embarrassing leaks.

A shawl/ scarf to cover up in public.
I brought breast feeding vest tops and even a jumper. I was more embarrassed about my mum tum on show than my boobs!

Always have a snack for you and try to have a drink of water every time you feed.

It really helps with bonding.
I struggled to bond with no2 and would have taken much longer if I didn’t actually have to feed her. I really feel if I had been able to pass her over to someone else with a bottle things would have been different.

A big one for me is don’t get caught up in how long they feed, how much are they getting. If they want more they will let you know!
Remember the charts in the red book are based on 40 American bottle fed babies from last century!

I had milk for England, a fast flow and a baby with reflux who would drain one side- vomit it all up in a projectile way and then drain the other side. She was on the bottom arc on the chart and I argued with the HV all the time when they asked how much she was getting.
You will never know because you can never express as much as a baby can suck.

Relax and go with it. Whatever happens as long as you are happy and baby is thriving you are doing well.

No worries about sterilising things or buying sterilising equipment
No huge bags of baby stuff to carry round apart from nappies and wipes
No need for bottles (straight from breast to cup)
Helps figure return to normal quicker
Real close link (literally) to baby
Cheap
Food and drink on tap

I had a great BFing experienceand nursedboth my boys, for 3 yrs each.

It can be sore to begin with. Stick with it, use lanolin and feeds lots to avoid getting engorgéd - and practice makes perfect! My main advice is feed the baby, whenever you can, as often as you can. Park yr bum on the sofa, box set / phone / books and drinks / food to hand and just feed the baby. Don’t attempt to do much else, it can wait. Once nursing is well established you can venture out and about.

Also, don’t compare yr baby’s eating / sleeping / growth etc to that of a ff baby.

Kellymom.com is a great resource for bf mums.

Bon courage!

I've fed two DCs - one for 19 months and am still feeding the younger one who is nearly 10mo.

Neither had tongue tie or any other medical issues that could affect bf so I was quite lucky. With DC1 I did find the first night in hospital hard trying to get him to latch but the next day one of the bf support midwives came round and helped me and gave me a lot more confidence in getting him latched on. Nipples were sore for a couple of weeks (used lanolin cream) and I did have the classic latch on/let down pain for a couple of weeks as well. This was sore but did go away. DC1 soon got the hang of it all and was a real boob monster tbh. He wasn't a great sleeper but this was more teething-related. He happily took expressed milk from a bottle on the odd occssion I had to leave him which I first tried when he was 8wo. When I returned to work he had expressed milk during the day.

DC2 was born only just at term and was quite small and sleepy so had to be chivvied along for the first couple of weeks, with me keeping him awake amd actively feeding. He latched very well from day one but did prefer one side and I worked hard to get his latch just as good on the other side. He preferred the 'rugby hold' position for feeding on his less favoured side when he was tiny. No nipple pain or let down pain this time around. Again after a couple of weeks I felt he cracked it and things have been fine ever since. He also took ebm from a bottle but started rejecting bottles when he started teething. Now I am back at work he has ebm from a cup at the childminder's.

Never had thrush or mastitis! Have had a blocked duct once with each DC but managed to sort it out by using the tactics you see recommended online - massage, dangle feeding, brushing the boob in the shower etc. Have loved bf and loved the closeness it brings. I've always fed in public and have never received negative comments. It is very labour intensive until the baby is about 3mo but then it does get a lot easier as they finish feeds quicker etc. You do have to accept that it will be time-consuming and try to enjoy it!

Breastfed two for a minimum of six months each (currently still breastfeeding youngest DC who is nearly 1)

-didnt have any issues with first one in the beginning so was surprised to find it such a struggle initially with second child. Had issues with poor latch and nipple soreness but had a couple of days using nipple shields and practiced with different positions and everything was fine after the first few weeks, so glad I persisted it really is very easy and convenient once you get over the tricky stage

• have fed in public loads and never received any abuse or scowls in fact I've been encouraged and praised

I do enjoy breastfeeding despite some of the drawbacks because I know it's not forever - they're only little for such a short time. I'll be looking to wean my youngest off day time feeds once I go back to work soon as I find expressing a faff. I don't mind the night feeding as we co sleep for it and I like the cuddles and bonding. As I said, it's not forever.

My baby came 6 weeks early and was in SCBU for the first 3 days then we had to stay in hospital (he was under the phototheropy lights) for another 4 days. My milk kicked in on day 2 and my boobs were insane. As DS was jaundice, he was sleepy and as he was early, he was small and had to be tube fed. On day 1 the hospital gave him formula without even speaking to me about how we were going to feed, or trying to encourage me to breastfeed or express. I was determined to try though as I knew that BF helped with jaundice. I expressed every 2 hours and tube fed DS even though they hospital kept trying to give him formula (I literally had a shelf in the fridge full of milk, which they couldn't be bothered to get). BF was hard though. As he was sleepy and small, it was really hard to get him to latch and took days. On our last day in hospital one of the nurses slapped a nipple sheild on and it worked!! I used the sheild for 2 months before weaning him off and just on the boob. By that time my nipples had toughened up a bit so it wasn't as painful. We successfully fed until he was 10 months and only stopped because I was back at work, my supply had dried up a fair bit and he preferred the bottle. Had no problem switching him over and I think that was thanks to the nipple sheild. I wish I had been able to continue feeding but it came to a happy end for DS. You would have no idea to look at him (2 years on) that he was ever premature or every poorly. He's so big and strong, hit every milestone and eats like a champ.

I am currently bfeeding my third. Fed the other 2 for almost 2 years. It hurt for the first 2 weeks but beyond that was the most special bonding experience and my older children are both happy and healthy. I am so glad I did it.

Look at it as a series of mikestones, the first 3-5 days baby has colostrum and you wait for your mik to come in you wont get much sleep but your partner will hopefully be able to do a lot of nappies and support you in other ways, you may find people trying to push formula on you so that you can get to sleep but it may affect your mim supply so hold strong!

The first 2 weeksare normally the most painful and you still wont have any kind of routine but you will feel more confident as your baby will have been weighed and measured a couple of times. If you need halp ask for it there are lots of people who can support you with it

I found that once you get to around 6 weeks you start to notice baby regularly going about 2 hrs without a feed. Some lucky mums have 4 hours together at night by now

Then at some point between 2 and 6 months baby will start feeding more effciently and less frequently. For me is was around 18/20 weeks

just feed on demand, dont worry about overfeeding or let others tell you they dont need feeding. In the first 6 weeks you can be fairly sure that if baby is crying baby wants feeding. Once you get past the first few weeks, it's easier, cheaper and less faff and IMO creates an amazing bond that no-one else can have with your baby. I expressed with my first 2 and it really really helped so I would strongly advise doing that.

I breastfed 4 children for over a year each.
Each baby put on vast amounts of weight in the early days. They turned into slim active kids and slim active young adults.
I am exactly the same size as I was before children and lost all pregnancy weight within weeks each time.
None of my children has asthma, excema, etc.
It was so so easy. I walked round the house with whichever one it was stuffed up my T shirt. I fed all through the night half asleep, never got up, never made bottles.
No baby ever had gasto enteritis.
My mum told me it would be easy and it really was.

Me!

I was sort of ambivalent but planned to BF. Then it was hard going as my daughter just wouldn’t latch properly or would fall asleep; she was a very sleepy newborn . Every lactation consultant and community midwife going tried to help to no avail. My mind was made up to persevere as long as I was making all that milk and I am very stubborn and hate to fail!

Ended up pumping and dropper/ then bottle feeding expressed milk round the clock for 4 weeks. Got horrible comments and snide remarks from some of the “support groups” for giving her expressed milk in a bottle. I found these groups were more meeting friend groups for actively breastfeeding mothers rather than to give practical help/support for those who were trying their very hardest to just make it happen like I was. That was odd and could have been disheartening if I wasn’t as stubborn as I am. Just ignore and do what’s best for you and your baby- and if that’s feeding milk of whatever kind through a bottle then so be it!

And then one day she just magically got the hang of it & we ended up BF exclusively till I went back to work and then combination of pumped and BF for some time after that. The LC thought perhaps she just had a small mouth and needed to grow a little bit and become more wakeful. She was right.

It can be done, and it is SO worth it if you’re able to persevere. There is a lot of help out there but be warned the ‘support groups’ may be less helpful if you are unfortunately struggling. But I hope your local group will be more helpful than mine was.

Good luck to you!

Mine were breastfed til 23 months and 28 months, not more than night and morning by the end, and probably never in public after about 16 months.
I LOVED it; was definitely one of the best things about early parenthood for me and I was so sad when it came to the final feed.
Yes, it took a little perseverance in the early days of DD1 but we got there. I never expressed and never even owned a bottle.
It's really easy to feed discreetly if you want to and are willing to moderate your dress (loose-ish tops rather than body con dresses) - no need for any of those odd breastfeeding shields in my experience. I fed DC2 all the way through a catholic funeral mass to keep her quiet and I don't believe anyone noticed, even people on my pew!
I think people almost set themselves up to fail by getting in formula and bottles "just in case it doesn't work out". Have confidence in yourself that it will work out, and if it's difficult, you will work through it and get there in the end (I did have two fairly easy deliveries though... think you might feel less equipped to cope with further trauma if you'd had a long / difficult birth).
Best of luck. Hope you get as much out of it as I did.

First six weeks were tough with my two. But once we got into the swing of it I had no problems at all. Fed both over a year. Was the skinniest I’ve ever been despite eating like a horse!!

Good luck!

I breastfed Dd for just over 3 years. She was exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months when we introduced solid food. I feel great about giving her that start in life.

That said, without the help of our lactation consultants and the complete dedication of my husband, it would not have happened. We needed some definite intervention. The first few days DH has to stand by my side for every feeding waiting lightly push the plunger on the syringe connected to the tube taped to my nipple. After a few days we switched to an sns and things got easier, but he was still washing and sterilizing pump parts around the clock that first week. Once she hit a week we got to switch to just washing once a day so that was easy.

I tell my story, not to scare you, but to be honest that you may face some challenges. The key is to have a plan in place. Have the number for breastfeeding help ready before you deliver and call it at the very first sign of trouble.