To ask for positive breastfeeding stories?

[Tallpinetrees]

I'm currently pregnant with my first and obviously keen to get as much information as possible to be prepared. I've been asked if I'm going to give breastfeeding a try, and I hope so!

A couple of people have told me their birth "horror" stories, which were quite scary, but I really enjoyed reading Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth and all the stories of women confidently and quietly (or not so quietly!) giving birth.

AIBU to ask for some encouraging and inspiring stories about breastfeeding?

I breastfed my 4 babies with no problems other than sore nipples at one point with all of them and a hard swollen boob with my second which was cured with a cabbage leaf in my bra. I was 17 when I had my first and I was given all manner of negative and inappropriate 'advice' which I didn't listen to. I was asked to leave many places for feeding my first baby, this didn't put me off at all, maybe even strengthened my resolve. My first dd has also breastfed her 4 kids. To me, it didn't make sense to bottle feed as that looked like too much work, sitting with the babies feeding and being close together seemed much easier and I don't regret one moment of it.

Tip - It's all about positioning!
I was taught it's 'tummy to mummy' - 'nose to nipple' - so baby is facing you with their tummy against you, and has to lift their head a little to latch on.
If you need to un-latch as the baby is not in the right position or hurting you, break the seal between you and babies lips with your little finger before trying to pull off.
Good luck !!

I breastfed 2 boys. Both latched perfectly themselves from the start and we didn't encounter any problems along the way. My second even gained weight in the first 48 hours! Fed them both until they were 9 months old, when weaning and food took over.

Learn to feed lying down. Then you can doze and feed. And when you follow the sensible advice about using a finger to break the suction to “de latch”, make sure it’s a wet finger.

I'm currently suffering from mastitis, it's miserable. But I wouldn't not breastfeed unless there was a medical reason why I couldn't/shouldn't.

Breastfeeding is tough during the first few weeks - it hurts. I've had four babies, and it's hurt to varying degrees each time.

However, once you and your baby get used to it, it's the easiest way to feed baby, and it creates such an amazing bond.
There's loads of nursing tops and dresses out there so your wardrobe isn't compromised.

The most important thing to be aware of is that breastfeeding isn't plain sailing at the beginning. Your nipples need to get used to baby on them constantly, and they will be sore. But it does get better, so much better!

Nipple shields, lasinoh and a good breast pump are your friends!

I’m still bf DS at 16 months and overall it’s been a fabulous experience but, and I’m guessing you’re seeing a theme here, it was challenging at the start.

DS was born with tongue tie but nobody at the hospital could diagnose it or figure out why he wasn’t latching easily. On day 3 we paid for a private IBCLC who immediately diagnosed tongue tie & referred us to a private tongue tie specialist who sorted it within days. So basically we threw money at the problem which I acknowledge we were very lucky to be in a position to do (we would’ve had to wait 4 months for tongue tie specialist on NHS)

Other than 1 bout of mastitis I had very little pain. And I echo those who say it suddenly became very easy at about 6 weeks when the worst of the cluster feeding was done & DS mastered his latch. Up to that point just have zero expectation on yourself to do anything but feed the baby & feed yourself.

The only other thing I’d raise to watch out for/ prepare for is the risk of feeling resentful of your OH due to the tie of bf. Even though I wanted to bf, pushed through the hard first weeks, it is hard at 3/4 months when it feels like your OH has got out the other side of first baby madness & gets to go out again while you’re still just feedibg alot. Just hang in there, soon you’ll be weaning onto solids & things will change again.

BF is amazing, not without challenges but those challenges are short lived. Hope that’s positive?!

Bf both mine, no problems. So easy for me, baby wakes in night? Pop on your boob.
Baby cries on bus? Pop on your boob.
Camping? No worries about water quality. I loved it.
Expressed a bit if going out without baby- that was a little uncomfortable at times but I also supplemented with formula. Health visitor was a bit obsessed for a few months when my ds was in the lower quartile on weight chart (I wasn’t worried as he was smiling and full of beans!) He’s now 20, six foot plus and healthy.

First baby, thought I would give breastfeeding a go, mainly as it was cheaper! Baby came out opening and closing his mouth, fed straight away. Never had any issues. I just went with the flow. Bf for 15 months. Second baby was born early and was unwell but once she was better she bf with no issues until 14 months. Both gained weight well and I have never experienced any negative reactions to breastfeeding in public.

DD took to BF right away and I BF until she was nearly 3. No problem whatsoever. Coslept from birth with boob hanging out so we both got adequate sleep. Like pp BF all over the place e.g. Cafe enabling me to have coffee in peace, on planes and other transport, while having my dinner etc. Never ever got a funny look or comment.

I loved the way it was portable plus a great source of comfort for DD to be on boob so don't have many memories of her crying for longer periods as I could just get my bap out!!

Loved it and miss it (DD 5 now). My sister struggled for first 3 months but persevered and BF for 18 months. Our mum BF and in my family it was assumed you'd BF because that was the norm. Never even considered formula as I didn't really know much about it and just assumed our boobs are for feeding and that's that. I don't even consider myself lucky to be able to BF as in my circle it was considered normal to BF. Just one person in my NCT who was unable to for a genuine medical reason.

Good luck.

DS latched on in recovery after C section, fed great from day 1 and never lost any weight after birth, didn't need any classes or support he just took to it, no sore nipples or boobs, only stopped as my supply was drying up about 12 weeks so switched him to formula. Good luck

I'm still breastfeeding my second son he's nearly 2.5 he latched on within 30 mins of being born, he lost no birth weight and went from being on the 50th percentile when born to the 99th at 3 months! I had no pain at all, no sore nipples,no pain at all!
He wouldn't take a bottle. I had hoped when I returned to work when he was 6 months I could express and send him to nursery with a bottle. But in the end he just had a few sips from a cup with his food and that was enough until I picked him up ( I work all day 8-6 two days a week and a half day). I stopped expressing at work as he wouldn't drink the depressed milk and my supply just adjusted and got used to having two days where I didn't feed for hours. I sometimes felt a bit engorged but nothing too bad!
People often think breastfed babies don't sleep as well. He's slept quite well, by 3 months just waking once in the night, unfortunately teething meant at 6 months he was waking multiply times! But by a year he was sleeping through 90% of the time.
I've also only ever had one comment when out breastfeeding in public and that was from an elderly lady saying how wonderful it was to see a mother feeding her child.
I breastfed my first son too but he was premmie so a whole different story! But even though he was 2 months early we left hospital exclusively breastfeeding and again I had no pain at all and no negative reactions when breastfeeding in public.
Lots of luck for you and your breastfeeding journey x

Just to add I coslept from birth even on the one night we stayed in hospital until he was one and sleeping through the night. This really helped with allowing me to rest and get sleep as he could just latch on whenever he needed. He never used his crib (at least my eldest used it!) or any next to me type crib that attaches to the bed, although we do have a super king size bed!

I’ve had a really positive experience, and am still feeding (once a day) 2 year old dd. I was breastfed and always assumed I would too, so I guess it was normal for me and I went into it without any major worries, just assuming we would figure it out, as women and babies had been forever.

Dd fed brilliantly from first time, took a couple of days to perfect the latch but no real difficulties there and I had support from midwives in hosp and at home. First couple of weeks was a bit sore on occasion as I adjusted, but lansinoh helped a lot. Cluster feedings in the evening with a newborn are hard going, but get a comfy position, snacks to hand and something to watch and it’s a phase that doesn’t last for long really.

So in the 27 months I’ve been breastfeeding, I’ve done it literally everywhere I’ve been, no one has ever made any kind of negative comment or even a funny look. I’ve never had mastitis. It’s been a brilliant tool and a huge comfort through teething, illness and tantrums!

I bf my kids till about 4 years old. They stopped naturally, with a little bit of gentle encouragement and distraction. (Down to one bedtime feed by the end.) In my family & cultural background, bf is the standard option so it never occurred to me to do anything else. Not gonna lie - the first 3 months are tough; a newborn feels like a hoover nozzle clamped to your skin. Power through that and you’ll be totes fine for the rest of the time. (And I successfully tandem fed. The contrast between a newborn and an older child is extreme! You temporarily forget how strong the newborn “suction” effect is until your next child comes along!) I can’t recall the precise stats but it’s something like 2% or less are unable to bf for various reasons (including surgical & medical reasons). So, statistically, you should be absolutely fine. And there’s always formula if it doesn’t work out. This isn’t the Edwardian era; most moms have affordable options! :)

I had a lot of trouble to begin with as I had a c-section and it took a little while for my milk to come in so my little boy needed a few formula feeds to keep him going (had gestational diabetes).

Very painful to start with but I preserved as a friend said it was hard work so I expected that. My son never latched properly but that didn’t seem to stop him getting enough milk and he fed really quickly (less than ten minutes from about four months) which made things easier.

Once it works it works really well so preserver but not to the extent of causing you or your baby distress. I wish I hadn’t worried about the latch as it was a non-issue as he was gaining weight. I wish my friend who didn’t produce enough milk had been given more support to just formula feed rather than worry so much about breastfeeding.

In the end I loved it so much I’m still feeding at 2 1/2. He’ll be my only so once I’m finished I’m finished forever.

DD1 was in SCBU for the first five days and despite a big sign that said Breastfed baby, no bottles she would always just have had a bottle when I went to feed her. Grrr. One nurse did say they wanted to measure how much milk she was taking... Despite that, we managed to get straight into BF when we got home. No pain, no problems. It really was dead easy.

DD2 was also an easy feeder, but the afterpains were horrendous. I had to take painkillers despite having had two drug free labours. That only lasted a few days and after that it was a dream. Unfortunately I had to give up at 5 months when I became ill (unrelated).

Looking back, I'm not sure I could have coped with bottle feeding - always having to be organised enough to have formula, clean bottles and teats and prepared bottles if I was delayed anywhere. I traveled a lot when both were young (family hundreds of miles away as well as in Canada) and BF meant I could travel light as well as feed to make the flights easier.

Good luck, OP!

I don’t have personally good bf experiences, however, of my NCT of 6 couples, 4 of the mother’s fed reasonably easily. My cousin is feeding her child with no trouble and in my family breastfeeding was the norm and my mum breastfed 3 children with no issues at all for 2 years each.

Go in with a positive attitude, armed with knowledge and some flexibility. Ask for help when needed.

Remember that is doesn’t ALWAYS work so follow your instincts too.

Good luck - I’m sure it will be fine.

I’ve bf both my children. In both cases baby lost weight initially and I was encouraged to top up with formula. I stood my ground and all sorted in a week or so. Bf baby 1 for 7mths and still feeding baby 2 (she’s 1). I’m a breastfeeding peer supporter for the NCT now, it might be worth looking into support in your local area prior to birth to help get over any bumps in the road.

Also, both babies good sleepers so don’t worry about people saying formula = better sleepers!

I'd heard that it was important to get baby to latch as soon as poss after birth. Put my newborn near my nipple and they latched almost immediately. Baby continued to be very good at latching. I made sure I offered boob every 2-3 hours in the early days. I didn't find it painful, just a strange strong sensation for first ten seconds. I'd count down slowly from 10 and the feeling would be gone before I got to 3.
The only prob I had was an over supply of milk which I'm sure is much easier than an under supply. I loved BF and was sad when it came to an end.

I think it’s luck off the draw. I had every problem under the sun with DD and none at all with DS. They bfed to 3yo and 2.5yo.

When done correctly it shouldnt hurt but it is easy to get it wrong. If it hurts get expert help ASAP. Different positions, different latches and dealing with tongue tie all help enormously. Co-sleeping and feeding in a sling made my life a lot easier.

I have breastfed both my DC. DD until 13 months. Still feeding DS who's 9 months.

May be cross posting as haven't read full thread but here are my thoughts.

Good things:

It's so convenient to do when you're out and about. No kit to take with you or clean. And cheap too! I honestly would not know where to start with prepping bottles to take out with me.

Great bonding, I'm sure you get it with ff too but there is just something immeasurably precious about feeding your baby from your body and looking at their little faces and their hands exploring and gently (and not so gently) tugging and patting you! Not so much the nipple twiddling though...

Good for the figure. With both DC I lost a lot of weight in the first 6 months. I definitely attribute a lot of that to breastfeeding.

Good start to life for baby - controversial I know, and obvs fed is best. And I see no difference in babies who are ff and those who are bf. Except my DC are rarely ill, maybe just a coincidence but hey, it does help to know I'm giving them the best start I can because I've been lucky enough to be able to. Although I do think there really isn't much in it...

Bad things:

The sleep deprivation. I know one or two mums with ff babies who don't sleep but basically it seems if you have a bf baby, buckle in for not much sleep. My DS took formula and bf in his first week (he was premature and wouldn't latch) and he did some great stretches of sleep after formula! Mind, both my DC are crap sleepers so maybe it makes no difference.

The pain in those first few weeks. Have heard people saying it's worse than childbirth, it certainly is agony as baby latches on to your poor cracked nipples at 3am and you cry because it's fucking agony and you are so exhausted. But...it's for a relatively short time and it does pass. You'll suddenly be feeding and realise there's no pain and you're actually enjoying it! PS nipple shields come in different sizes, I had no idea, ordered some at 3am and they were large, only realised my error when they arrived and were mahoosive.

Baby refusing a bottle. I had no idea this was a thing until I had DD. Then DS started to refuse a bottle too. Obvs if they are not taking a bottle you can forget about much time to yourself at least in those first 6 months! It's a bit crap but it is what it is.

Limited wardrobe. Limited social opportunities at night as only you can settle baby. Learning to feed in public. The biting. Not much wine!

But all in all...i love it and I'm going to be so sad when I stop feeding DS as he is my final baby. I'm so pleased I was able to do it, I know that it's not for everyone though and you must do what is right for you and your baby. But it is so worth a bit of perseverance IME.

Good luck

I have a 4 week old and from his birth found breastfeeding incredibly easy. The first 2 days nipples hurt then toughened up. He didn’t lose any birth weight, in fact gained 100g in the first week. My advice is just to feed feed feed. The more you feed the less engorgement, quicker the milk comes in, better the latch process etc. Just believe in yourself and be confident baby will get enough - your body is perfectly designed by nature and evolution to provide exactly what your baby needs. It’s a wonderful experience.

Oh and yes it’s annoying re wardrobe and finding clothes easy for breastfeeding. But I found when feeding in public you care much more about making sure your hungry baby is fed than what other people think (fuck them anyway if they are judging you).

First DS I fed until he was 6 months old. Second DS born at 28 weeks. Dr advised me to express as would help his gut . Anyhow he started feeding properly when he would have been 32 weeks gestation. Had to go to the hospital every day, twice a day to feed and express. He came home at 9 weeks and I fed him until he was 2.5 years old. Please try and feed your baby, best thing for them, however if you don't get on with it, don't beat yourself up.