Bus Drama

[kikisparks]

I get the bus home from work and there is often bus drama, sometimes verging on physical altercations.

Today there’s a Mum (I assume) with 3 kids one a very small girl in pram. Wee one is singing but then starts squealing/ yelping/ making animal noises loudly.

Bus driver says to the Mum that he doesn’t mind the singing but can’t cope with the shouting.

The Mum seems very annoyed and says “she’s only one what am I meant to do.”

I had to get off bus and driver said “lucky you.”

So who was BU?

1. Driver
2. Woman
3. Me (surely for some reason, this is AIBU)

(FWIW I have a high tolerance for noise and wasn’t bothered by the LO, not got a predetermined view but probably veering towards driver BU).

Its all very well people saying sing, read stories and play peekaboo all day long.
However that's just not real life. No body lives like that. Well I didn't.

If the bus driver had said that to me I don’t think I would have been able to help myself. I would have said “Nah the noise doesn’t bother me. Some people are just more tolerant than others I guess” with a nice big passive aggressive smile.

FrancisCrawford

Oh no, not animal sounds

It doesn't sound like there was a cacophony of sound preventing the driver from doing his job. It was normal baby noise and he was a misanthropic tit.

And this is the point where I would have taken the child outside to calm down

People don't seem to do this so much now, do they? I was forever taking my little'uns outside so as not to disturb others, be it at the Doctors, a restaurant or a school assembly. Nowadays the mothers just let them scream - sod everyone else.

FrancisCrawford

The driver was a grouchy git, and I would bet the farm he wouldn't have challenged a bloke.

And this is the point where I would have taken the child outside to calm down

People don't seem to do this so much now, do they? I was forever taking my little'uns outside so as not to disturb others, be it at the Doctors, a restaurant or a school assembly. Nowadays the mothers just let them scream - sod everyone else.

Oh come on. This was a bus and the parent has somewhere to be as well. I’m sure they can’t wait to get off either. This is nothing like being in a restaurant. Everyone has somewhere to be and parents’ time isn’t any less important than anyone else’s, so no they shouldn’t jump off the bus the instant their child makes a noise.

Oh come on. This was a bus and the parent has somewhere to be as well
I was commenting about the pp who was in a GP surgery. Obviously, in this case, she shouldn't have to get off the bus but she could attempt to quieten her child, no?

The mother was being unreasonable by her attitude.

A simple “sorry, I’m doing my best to keep him quiet” together with actually trying to keep the child quiet would have resulted in a far different response.

Bus drivers have to put up with all sorts of hideous behaviour. I cannot blame them for getting exasperated at times.

Obviously, in this case, she shouldn't have to get off the bus but she could attempt to quieten her child, no?

Yeah of course, but sometimes it doesn’t work. It’s people kick off and the parent is clearly flustered as it is who piss me off.
I once got on the bus and my 4 year old was being a bit feisty about the bus seat we were sat on 🙄 Nowhere else to sit and I was telling him it’s ok it’s not a long journey, and was trying to distract him. He still wasn’t happy and quite honestly I couldn’t wait to get off the bus. Then this man pipes up behind us .

wrenika in my scenario, it would have been an impossibly long walk home. Have you any idea how big London is?

There are a lot of ways to distract a one year old, it's very unreasonable for the mother to not even try. Getting off the bus can be hard, especially if you have appointments or end up in the middle of nowhere, so it depends where the bus is and on other circumstances about whether that's practical. I bet the mother would have stopped her own car if she was driving and the noise got too much for her to concentrate though and sometimes getting off the bus and walking is the best answer. The driver said he was ok with the singing (i.e. less distracted), so quietly starting up the one year old's favourite song clearly might have worked, involving the older kids in distraction could help too.

I don't think the driver was "unprofessional", he's human, having a light joke with a passenger is a nice thing to do.

JacquesHammer hideous behaviour? Have you ever been around a 1yr old?

Have you ever been around a 1yr old

Yes I had one.

You misread my post. I didnt mean the behaviour of the one year old was hideous. Just that bus drivers so put up with such rotten behaviour I can see how this was the straw that broke the camels back

I'm with the driver.

All these posters saying “I’m with the driver” are just ridiculous. Have any of you actually ever spent time with a 1 year old? Sometimes they make noise and sometimes you can’t do anything about it. Surely a London bus driver is used to noise and I’ve never been aware that bus passengers are to remain completely silent for the duration of the journey so as not to distract them.

FrancisCrawford

Because grouchy gits are more likely to take out their grouchiness on weaker people - bullies, basically.

having a light joke with a passenger is a nice thing to do.

He wasn't having a light joke though, he was having a sly dig at a young child and her mother.

That’s a huge assumption to make without any evidence regarding this particular bus driver.

And yet everyone is very quick to leap to the assumption that the mother is a lazy cow who doesn't give a shit about anyone else on the bus so long as her previous darling is happy.....

*precious

Option 3 - you were being unreasonable. Obviously you should have stayed on the bus for the full journey to help this Mum, by either offering to watch her two older children while she attended to the one-year-old, or by distracting and playing with the one-year-old yourself.