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Original poster

Help!! Stop me. Stop me!!!!!

71 replies

ilovesliz · 01/08/2018 19:45

I am a peri menopausal woman in a bad mood. Husband has been annoying me all day.

He's just gone into the garage. Stop me from locking him in. The key is in the lock. All I have to do is turn it...

Yes I am. But it's so tempting.

OP posts:
sporadicrains · 01/08/2018 20:41

Just how annoying was he??!!

Agastache · 01/08/2018 20:41

Do you not say 'darling, if I watch you step over that footwear instead of moving it out of the way I am going to lock you in that bloody garage and fuck off to the pub/allotment/garden/whatever'?

Original poster
ilovesliz · 01/08/2018 20:42

I've missed my chance. He's come out in a bad mood because he's superglued his fingers together.

Oh well, another day, another time.

OP posts:
UniversalAunt · 01/08/2018 20:42

Glue the trainers down in front of the door.
That way, everybody learns something about leaving stuff lying around.

blacksax · 01/08/2018 20:43

Erm... it's a trap OP. The superglue, the coming in and out to check where you are...

Shock Don't go in there.

Original poster
ilovesliz · 01/08/2018 20:44

How annoying? Well, you know that hurt look when they say Why are you shouting at me? I haven't done anything.

YESSS. You haven't done anything which is why I'm shouting at you Angry

OP posts:
Tinkobell · 01/08/2018 20:44

I think if you lock him in he'll go ffing ape shit when he does get out .....then your day will just go from bad to a lot worse. What if he needs a piss or something? If a man did that to his wife, MN would cry abuse abuse!! just go to bed and sulk.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 01/08/2018 20:48

Glue the trainers down in front of the door. That way, everybody learns something about leaving stuff lying around.

Sheer genius.

Cuttingthegrass · 01/08/2018 20:49

Love it YESSSS you haven't done anything that's why I'm shouting

I get you

Cuttingthegrass · 01/08/2018 20:50

Oh but sorry your angst was my amusement as I know that feeling

Jjjjigoo · 01/08/2018 20:50

Tinkobell I don't think the op is really being serious.

Agastache · 01/08/2018 20:59

I think if you lock him in he'll go ffing ape shit when he does get out .....then your day will just go from bad to a lot worse. What if he needs a piss or something? If a man did that to his wife, MN would cry abuse abuse!! just go to bed and sulk.

Do you take everything as literally as this?

AuntyJackiesBrothersSistersBoy · 01/08/2018 20:59

Open a bottle of wine, OP. Let him get on with his superglue antics.

YearOfYouRemember · 01/08/2018 21:01

I once locked my dh in the garage. Later I heard banging and was cursing him for making so much racket. Then he turned the power off …. And I discovered why he was banging Grin.

Original poster
ilovesliz · 01/08/2018 21:03

I can't drink wine tonight, I have to go and pick a teenager up at 10pm.

I'll drive along at 40mph whatever the speed limit just to annoy everyone as per the other thread. HA! That will show them!

DH is picking bits of superglue off his fingers. It's moments like these that make marriage a joy.

OP posts:
Bunnyfuller · 01/08/2018 21:09

Lock the fucker in for a bit. He’s clearly deliberately winding you up and not being caring of your ‘madopause’ (mad as in angry).

Mine keeps wondering why I punch him in the throat when he repeatedly asks ‘what do you mean, you’re hot?’

UpstartCrow · 01/08/2018 21:10

Buy something really random like clown shoes and just casually let him find them.

Charolais · 01/08/2018 21:13

Turn that key! Do it for the team!

GetOffTheTableMabel · 01/08/2018 21:14

Build a wall of trainers to seal him in....

dementedma · 01/08/2018 21:21

agree superglue the trainers to the floor. that is bloody genius.
If your dh is also breathing loudly, sniffing, and trying to tell you things about Everton, you can kill him. that's what I'm planning on doing to mine anyway.

sporadicrains · 01/08/2018 21:31

What was he doing with the superglue anyway?

Sticking that precious ornament back together - you know, the one you haven't noticed is missing yet...?

VanillaSugar · 01/08/2018 21:40

Not far off @sporadicrains Grin

Not all the pieces are back together.

Original poster
ilovesliz · 01/08/2018 21:41

He's asked me if I want to do some yoga.

OP posts:
Whereismumhiding2 · 01/08/2018 21:46

Make a circle of salt around the garage. That'll keep the annoying in there, next he goes into garage. He might not be able to LEAVE! Grin

Whereismumhiding2 · 01/08/2018 21:47

It's 21.41! Do you want to do Yoga? Or has he upped his annoyance game?! Put the circle of salt around him quick!!

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