My 7yr old needs a filling!!! Where am I going wrong???

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I am mortified but also, really confused.
We are annoyingly particular about what our children eat, and their health etc. they have the odd treat if going to a party or something but we don't have chocolate, sweets, fizzy drinks, fruit juice, cakes, biscuits in the house etc. We avoid process food and make 95% of our meals ourselves (even rearing our own meat and growing our own veg). They are both very healthy, fit children.
They both brush their teeth for 1min each twice a day and we follow it by us brushing their teeth for another two minutes. DS's and 7 and 5.
DS1 needs a filling and dentist accused me of neglecting his teeth, but then DS2 has 'the most perfect' teeth he had seen in a 5 year old. After seeing DS2's he backed off his parenting rant and said he had never seen two siblings with such different teeth - even asking me if DH and I were separated and the children lived in separate houses?
Where am I going wrong with DS1 - I've been looking at enamel problems or am I missing something health wise? Feel absolutely mortified today and like I failed my child!!

Friend had this with her son, like you she was so careful. The consultant looked at his diet and spotted yoghurt. He said that was the culprit.

I had lots of antibiotics as a child, my second teeth were striped, I now have a lot of implants. Sometimes you are unlucky. My Father never had a filling in his life his teeth were like a film stars. Genes!!

I’d swap the fruit for celery and carrot sticks. Drying fruit does concentrate the sugar and it can have bits that stick the sugar to teeth.

Definitely no orange juice or similar, plain water or milk. No lemon slices in water.

Don't have much to add but I am in a similar situation. I was devastated when I was told he needed a filling. However my dentist is a complete cow and leaves me feeling like I'm the worst mum in the world and that I must allow my son to eat haribo for breakfast and mainline Irn Bru. I've started taking my mil to all his appointments just incase I get a lecture again

Do you use fluoridated toothpaste, or are you in an area with fluoridated water? I am always shocked that it appears to be random in the UK whether or not there is fluoride in the water.
If not, make sure you’re using toothpaste with at least 1450ppm of fluoride in.

DD has problems with weak enamel in her emerging adult teeth. That is believed to be linked to having Chicken Pox at the wrong time (6-8months) as a baby.

I think antibiotics in pg can affect developing teeth. I agree it can be genetic. I have weak enamel which is cracking. When cracks join the tooth crumbles, needing a filling. It’s not decay though.

Apples contain a lot of sugar & also contain acid so probably best to have the fruit as part of a meal rather than as a snack. Some people do have weaker enamel & the acid in fruit can weaken this further- if you’re snacking on this with nothing else it’s sitting on the teeth for a couple of hours. Rinsing with water can help I think.

Same here. I had the most awful experience at the dentist and was made to feel like an
awful mother and my DD was in tears!

She also has enamel problems but the dentist was adamant her need for a filling was due to poor diet.

Anyway we aee changing dentist. Also stopping smoothies which I understand are worse than coke. I’m brushing their
teeth for them.

I ate a tonne of sweets as a kid and my teeth were perfect. DD had loads of ear infections as a child which I’m convinced have affected things despite the awful dentist!!

A colleague of mine was told by his dentist that he needed to eat less fruit - a diet can be “healthy” but still bad for your teeth.

antibiotcs can destroy teeth(tetracycholine in particular)
mom was on antibiotics when pregnant with baby sis,both sets came in brown and fragile.40 yrs ago and they knew then it was the antibiotics..i could buy a house with whats been spent trying todeal with this she ended up with veneers.
i developed sepsis from a badly tended injury was on i.v antibiotics for a week 18 months later my perfect teeth started to disintegrate.
had a very forward thinking dentist.he did a full medical history on me and had me go thru every kind of test imaginable.the antibiotics were found to be the cause.i was 30 and had absolutelly perfect teeth.now i cry every day.

One of my sons has hypomineralisation and has needed fillings and may possibly have to have one removed at some point. The cow of a dentist practically accused me of child neglect and there were mutterings about social services. Didn't seem to clock that my other three children have great teeth and the teeth that aren't hypomineralised and in good condition. She point blank refused to believe DS when he says he doesn't like fizzy drinks and sweeties (he doesn't and never has), didn't outright call him a liar, but near as damn it.

I took him to a different dentist and they spotted it straight away and he is on a treatment program to remineralize his teeth now. Some dentists are just judgy twats.

Don't beat yourself up. I have two who needed lots of fillings, and one who needed none at all. All had very similar diets, teeth brushing routines, etc.

They all had fissure sealants once their adult teeth came through, and none have needed fillings since.

Try not to be too hard on yourself. My DS recently had 2 teeth removed due to weak enamel. The dentist didn’t even ask about diet; just wanted to know about his birth and first 3 years. I was induced ending in an E-CS with DS straight onto antibiotics. According to his dentist, this alone may have caused wesk enamel formation. He also had his first asthma attack at 15 months which could be another contributing factor. Dentist said any trauma /illness during the first 3 years can hinder enamel formation.

Weak not wesk. 🙄

Hi where are you getting info re inhalers and antihistamine contributing? V interesting, my 9 year old needs a filling in adult tooth. I thought his allergies and asthma might mean weaker enamel somehow, but maybe it is the antihistamines plus regular steroid inhaler. They should brush straight after inhaler? Does it damage teeth?

I have five children. Two had fillings at a young age. They take after their dad. I've never had a filling. That is just luck/genetic.

My dentist made me feel like shit when my two needed them.

OP have a look at antibiotics and cavities as there is a link

I have terrible teeth and had 12 fillings as a child. I don’t drink fizzy drinks, I brush religiously, I go to the dentist...I still have crappy teeth. My brother doesn’t brush his teeth, he didn’t as a child and he only brushes once every few days as an adult (puke!) and he is constantly sucking on coke bottle, never visits the dentist and he’s never had a filling (even though he’s now 40yo). Some people just have really bad teeth, genetic lottery.

Not neccesarily anyone's fault at all.
The 'right' enzymes in the saliva will fix minor cavities automatically according to my dentist. (I seem to have been blessed with this, 45 and no cavities, no dentist will believe how much I used to love sweets and now fizzy wine ...)
Was it a filling in a milk tooth or a permanent tooth?
Asking because at 7 my DS's milk teeth started to dissolve and deteriorate on their own, dentist explained it as natural ageing of the teeth, their life span was over so to speak.

I was until recently awful with my teeth, no dentist in 15 years. Got the courage to go- fine. My friend uses inter dental brushes and is super careful and always needs work. It’s genes I think.

My older two have my teeth, really have to make them take care but perfect teeth. One has fallen asleep on the bottle every night for 6 years (asd) too. The youngest though loves teeth brushing, I’ve improved and am really good with her teeth and she already has a lot of decay. So unfair

It was the antibiotics in pregnancy and in his earlier youth. They are known to screw up teeth in many children.

Op, can I suggest to you the switch the below toothpaste.
The higher concentrate of fluoride definitely won't do you dc any harm.

To a PP with regards to steroid inhalers, it's really important they brush their teeth after them, it sticks to them, and causes damage to the enamel.
Shocked your HCP hadn't mentioned it!

Yes teeth cleaned after bedtime inhaler but he has the blue ventolin one at school & they don't clean teeth afterwards then.

No HCP has ever mentioned it just some other parents of asthmatic dc.

Will ask next time at doctors!

He also gets cheat infections so takes antibiotics & steroids maybe twice a year - getting less with age thankfully.

Was the one with bad teeth ill often? Antibiotics at young age can cause weaker teeth.