to find many aspects of religion incomfortable?

[MyHeadIsAMinefield]

I'm not religious. I am an atheist, however am not militant about it and respect the views of others. I wish I was religious myself at times and have found myself envious of those who do believe in a god.

I do however find many things about religion quite uncomfortable, and I'm not entirely sure why. I'm currently sat opposite a man on the train who has repeatedly said Allahu Akbar to himself whilst looking me in the eye. This has made me uncomfortable.

When entering in to conversation with someone who had strong religious views recently, I explained that I was not religious, and did not believe in a god. I didn't say why, I didn't try to disprove what they believed in, I just expressed my view. This person has not spoken to me since. I'm fine with this, however if I chose not to speak to them simply because they were religious I would likely be accused of discrimination or bullying. Again, very uncomfortable.

It makes me uncomfortable when I ask friends for advice or am simply engaged in conversation and the one friend I have who is very religious tells me it is part of God's plan or to just trust in god. This makes me uncomfortable, and I don't feel comfortable discussing my views, as being an atheist is so frowned upon by so many.

I guess religion just makes me feel exceptionally uncomfortable at times and I'm not entirely sure why. I don't believe in god, but it would be nice to live in a world where the idea god doesn't make you feel... weird. Where discussion was open and it wasn't an awful thing to be an atheist.

Does any of this make any kind of sense? Or do I just sound completely nuts?

You are fine, the people in your post sound nuts.

*uncomfortable not incomfortable

I agree with PersianCatLady. You aren’t the problem.

I'm currently sat opposite a man on the train who has repeatedly said Allahu Akbar to himself whilst looking me in the eye. This has made me uncomfortable.

I think we know why that might make you feel uncomfortable and it's probably not actually due to religion.

It's not just these events, it's the fact that so many people are religious and it is completely fine for hem to discuss their religious views openly, however if I am to ever talk openly about being an atheist it is often deemed unacceptable.

I guess I have a funny relationship with religion and struggle with the idea of it a little.

Of course you're not being unreasonable. You can believe or not believe whatever you want unless you try and force your beliefs/non beliefs on other people. Religion should be a private thing, not shoved down other peoples throats.

I also live in central Birmingham so may come across this more than those who live rurally...

Are you an atheist or are you agnostic? If you keep telling people you are atheist that's why they argue with you

If it makes you feel any better, atheism/non belief is the biggest growing "religion" in the world .

I find it best to stay away from religious types

And why would you wish there was a god or you had a belief in a god. Life is much better and more wondrous without it

@FASH84 I am an atheist, I'm not agnostic.

It's really interesting you say that though. Would you say it the other way round. 'It's because you keep telling people you're religious, that's why they argue with you?' I know it's slightly different as my 'belief' is actually a 'non-belief' - but this is my point. Why shouldn't I be able to say to someone who is talking to me as if I am interested in what god has to say that 'I am an atheist therefore do not believe'?

I have occasionally wished that I believed in god simply because I have been through some hideous things in life and the idea of there being an afterlife or believing that everything is 'meant to be' or 'part of a plan' would make life a lot easier. Ignorance is bliss and all that jazz.

This may be related to where you live. Where I am it seems as though those who do believe are seen as weird, and they tend to keep quiet about it.

It's pretty common in for atheists in very religious communities to be ostracised. When people believe that their hope of avoiding hell (and more importantly, their children's hope of avoiding hell) depends on their religious faith not being corrupted by unbelievers' ideas and influence, they have a strong (selfish) motivation to do this. So as long as these beliefs in hell are prevalent in fundamentalist religion, your hope for open discussion will be unacheivable, I'm afraid.

This thread is really offensive, I'm a non-believer but it's not ok to label 'religious types' , in the same way it's not ok to make negative assumptions about act group, protected characteristics and the EA exist for a reason. Why would you feel scared because someone has a belief you don't? Would you feel scared if he was saying a rosary? I doubt it. This is a modern world accept people for who they are, we don't all need to be the same and your OP implies that Muslim equals extremist.

Ok so it's not the religion your uncomfortable with, it's peoples behaviour to atheism.

I am agnostic, my husband is an atheist.
My parents and siblings are extremely religious and I grew up a Christian.

The reality of the matter is that I know more about the bible than they do. It was when I started to read it properly and not just listen to the bible stories told at church that I began to form my own views.

I'd recommend learning about religion just so that you can enter conversations / debates with more knowledge if that is what you wish...

If you don't wish to then I'd suggest just avoiding the subject of religion. It really doesn't come up that often - even in a family like mine!

@FASH84 I have not at any point stated that I am scared. I am not. I have not at any point linked anyone to terrorism which I would find incredibly offensive myself. I haven't implied anything and did not at any point believe the man in front of me may in fact be a terrorist. How ridiculous! You jumped to that conclusion all by yourself!

OP I ask because a lot of people don't know the difference. It also depends how you communicate, if you say I'm happy to learn about your faith but I don't share it, that comes across differently to God doesn't exist 🙄 and will make people feel defensive as it would if you strongly believed something and focussed your life and family around it, and someone essentially just said 'nah that's nonsense'.

You don’t live in a world where it’s weird to be an atheist. You live in a world where people are mocked, patronised and scorned for being religious. A world where people are murdered for being Christian in fundamentalist Islamic countries, or for being Muslim in a Buddhist country.
The person who no longer speaks to you probably feels that your atheism means you see life so totally differently from them that there is no point of contact or shared terms of reference.
I’m a Christian who has atheist and Buddhist friends, and who had Muslim and Hindu colleagues at work. I enjoy discussing my beliefs and comparing with theirs, but with atheists there is nothing there to discuss - they simply think the universe appeared out of nowhere, life has no purpose, and death is the end. I feel sorry for their sad nihilism, but I don’t see how to engage with it - if they don’t want a loving relationship with God, then that’s their choice.

OP it's not just me who interpreted what you did in that way. Also making it clear you live in an area known for a Muslim population was unnecessary, you could've said I live in a big city so it might be different. Are you a daily mail reader per chance?

But OP I thought the same as FASH bearing in mind your first specific example, so perhaps you may not have meant it but perfectly easy to see why some would think as we did.

I think you must mix in odd circles (or I do?) but I can go months, maybe even years, without religion, or lack thereof, coming up. I have a few friends who said they would prey for me when my mother was ill and then when she died. I took it in the spirit in which it was meant, that they were thinking of me, the god part not being relevant to me.

IME most people don't care what anyone else believes and wouldn't care if I spoke about being an atheist as long as I wasn't being a bore about it.

I don't care whether people have a faith or no faith at all. I do care when people show disrespect to other people about their beliefs/non belief.

I am on the fence regarding religion. I don't think it is nice to sneer at religious people because "they have an imaginary friend". I also think that religion or faith is personal, and don't approve of evangelism.

I really don't like the idea of missionaries going to other parts of the world to "convert the natives to christianity". All it does is destroy the local culture, although there are aspects of other cultures that do need to be wiped out, for example FGM.

@Babdoc

Don't you think it's offensive to 'feel sorry' for people who don't believe in god?

The same as I would be offensive if I said to you that I felt sorry for and pitied your deluded belief in a make believe character meant to manipulate people...

This is a huge problem in religion imo.

You also didn't answer my question as to whether someone saying a rosary would make you equally 'uncomfortable'

I think it's important to separate people from 'religion' to some degree - plenty of religious people (whatever that means) would not react as those people you spoke to.

I'm Jewish, and practising, but also an atheist (yes, this is a thing) and I have never felt marked out as Jew, but sometimes as a 'religious person', perhaps as I move in lefty circles where rather too many people are all 'Huh, religious people are all credulous bigots who think they're better than other people and must hate all other religions/atheists' (not saying you're like this, OP!) so I do often find myself explaining to people 'Consider that others may experience living in a religion in a way you haven't experienced or don't know about'. Eg, they may practice as a cultural tradition more than a faith, they may find spirituality in it without believing in God, they may have no interest in foisting it on other people, they may be involved in working together with members of other faiths for understanding etc.

I agree with poster about that to be less uneasy, find out more. Ask questions without judging. Then maybe the whole thing would feel less alien?