to find many aspects of religion incomfortable?

[MyHeadIsAMinefield]

I'm not religious. I am an atheist, however am not militant about it and respect the views of others. I wish I was religious myself at times and have found myself envious of those who do believe in a god.

I do however find many things about religion quite uncomfortable, and I'm not entirely sure why. I'm currently sat opposite a man on the train who has repeatedly said Allahu Akbar to himself whilst looking me in the eye. This has made me uncomfortable.

When entering in to conversation with someone who had strong religious views recently, I explained that I was not religious, and did not believe in a god. I didn't say why, I didn't try to disprove what they believed in, I just expressed my view. This person has not spoken to me since. I'm fine with this, however if I chose not to speak to them simply because they were religious I would likely be accused of discrimination or bullying. Again, very uncomfortable.

It makes me uncomfortable when I ask friends for advice or am simply engaged in conversation and the one friend I have who is very religious tells me it is part of God's plan or to just trust in god. This makes me uncomfortable, and I don't feel comfortable discussing my views, as being an atheist is so frowned upon by so many.

I guess religion just makes me feel exceptionally uncomfortable at times and I'm not entirely sure why. I don't believe in god, but it would be nice to live in a world where the idea god doesn't make you feel... weird. Where discussion was open and it wasn't an awful thing to be an atheist.

Does any of this make any kind of sense? Or do I just sound completely nuts?

@BlueTears this is my point about labelling or making assumptions about groups, it helps no one. It doesn't help to make assumptions about people who follow a certain faith, it doesn't help to do the same about those who don't. It creates walls and barriers were people feel 'uncomfortable' about difference which leads to division of communities

It's not you, it's them. I went to a church school, Sunday school, was in a club called Junior Christian Endeavour as a child, but the conditioning didn't work and I was never convinced. Religious types should show you the same level of respect that they expect from you. Who are they to judge? If they have true faith they should believe that only God can judge - perhaps remind them of that.

I used that example because it was happening at the time. I would've felt uncomfortable had they been looking me in the eye using any other religious phrase or saying.

It's a fact that central Birmingham has a high population of all types of religious people. I am from the Caribbean community, which is huge here. I was referring to it as a big city, that is all.

No I would not feel uncomfortable with someone wearing rosary beads, just as I wouldn't feel uncomfortable with someone wearing a hijab or turban for example

I have never had an issue myself. If you strongly feel there is no God, then why would you feel uncomfortable?
I have been around many different people of different faiths and we have all got along just fine. I've had Muslim, Christians and Buddhist people pray for me and in front of me (we had a young child seriously ill in hospital). I have had some lovely chats with Jehovahs Witnesses of whom I have fundamental disagreements as my child has had an organ transplant. I've spent time in numerous temples and churches, yet im still an atheist and never felt uncomfortable once.

You don't have to immediately inform every religious person that you don't believe in God. Obviously if they ask, then that's different. They are doing no harm to you and can believe what they want, as can you.

I don't believe you OP that you are at opposite someone that is looking you in the eye and repeatedly saying Allahu Akbar. That is BS. If a man was repeatedly saying Allahu Akbar he would be lowering his gaze, not looking you in the eye.

It is my opinion that all religions were formed as a way to control people.

If you think about the utter fantasy that religious people believe it’s clear these people have had their minds controlled to some degree.

Fine you're atheist. 0.01% of people or less have cared or batted an eyelid.

Move one. And stop trying to mask over your first example. You're the one leading us to that conclusion! And you know you are! You could have said 'gentleman was repeating a short prayer' instead but of course that was too broad for you

I do believe in god but i never engage in conversation about religion. Im happy in my belief and im happy there are those who follow a different line of thought. I dont justify and dont ever expect others to either.

I do however agree with you about the person who stopped talking to you. That may have been an overreaction on their part.

OP what will you do with regards to religion once you've given birth and your child is of school age? If the best school near you is CofE would you refuse to send them?

I’m not comfortable around religion either, I cannot get my head around why anyone would believe in a god, much less worship him if he is real.

I find it patronising and offensive when someone says they’ll pray for me.

My parents had me christened and I went to a catholic school, I cannot explain why being christened annoys me so much as it’s a meaningless ritual imo. But to have that done to me as a child when I had no choice irks me.

I find the cognitive dissonance required for religious belief and tolerance in society to be uncomfortable. If I were to tell you about my imaginary friend in the sky who dictates my life I’d rightly be considered nuts, yet it’s perfectly accepted when people believe this en masse, and everyone else is expected to tiptoe around and respect the delusion. Bizarre.

I don’t know what to say without offending anyone but I feel the same OP

I do have religious friends but thy can be incredibly judgemental about non-religious people. And none of the religions get along very well, even amongst themselves. Always disagreeing and arguing. It’s tiresome.

I also agree that religions are a way to control people. We have lots of threads mocking people who believe in ghosts or even homeopathy yet most religions are fairy tale to atheists

I think it's you, sorry!
I live in the same place, and yes there are many people here with very strong beliefs, from a broad range of religions and cults but I never feel uncomfortable- it's part of the rich tapestry of life.
I am a staunch atheist, but I have friends that are religious- we live and let live. We can have long, rambling conversations about beliefs/non-belief, rites and practices, interpretations of sacred documents etc. We just respect the fact that we have differing beliefs and doctrines from each other. The only people that are ever mildly mocking are those that are married to one another (because that kind of ribbing is ok within such a close relationship). Maybe it's because my parents were of two wildly different religions, I grew up debating and reasoning the merits and shortcomings of each.

I agree OP up to a point. I was religious - and part of my family still is. We don't discuss it - mutual respect. BUT outside of that I find it is a fairly strong force - and yes I sometimes find it uncomfortable.

OP

After many years of having religious people go on and on about their beliefs, knowing I don’t share them, I now respond by saying I’m an atheist. I was brought up to believe atheism was something to be ashamed of and it takes courage from me to say it aloud (I do also find it liberating). Responses usually range from being told I will go to hell or just stunned, offended silence.

I think many religious people fear atheists because atheists call into question the whole foundation of their worldview. Religion is founded on faith. When that faith goes, the whole house of cards falls. So much is at stake. Many people may also live in a religious way for the sake of community cohesion, etc.

Atheists should not be afraid to be honest, but on the flipside it is worth considering why religious people often give short shrift to dissenters.

I don't believe in religions, they are the cause of so much strife in the world and everyone thinks their religion is the right one. However i have a strong belief in God, but i never try and enforce that belief on anyone. I don't feel the need to chant any prayers to strangers either.

Just so you know many Muslims say alluhu akbar because they've been taught to say it if they feel anxious, afraid, nervous or feeling ill etc.. it's makes them feel better. A ex family member did it when he was goig n through a serious illness and it calmed him down.
it's only in the media that people say it before detonating a bomb. I'm sure you'll be fine love.

YANBU.

All regions = made up nonsense IMO.

Wonder why we have to respect ppl believing in imaginary things? (Do we all have to give the same respect to someone believing in horoscopes. in fairies, or in a flat earth?)

I mostly feel sorry for believers as they are simply deluded and wasting a lot of their time on sthing which is utterly pointless and not true. (Though I accept the idea of a happy afterlife is comforting to some.)

Guess religious beliefs/traditions are acceptable if they don't bother others? But they often do place a burden on the rest of us, and create social divisions. And I really don't like that it when religious folks try to brainwash their children into believing the same as they do, which is most of the time? (Sometimes in a subtle way but often forcefully.)

Religion should be for an individual adult to reflect/decide upon - it should not forced on them by the family under emotional pressure.

Faith is not scientific, so should not be automatically pandered to. (In other area of life, eg health/law/education, proof/results are usually required to be given status.)

Someone can say "I believe" ... in X. But cannot that X is true ... unless there actually is solid proof. (Till then we must remain deeply sceptical of X.)

@ShatnersWig I have absolutely no idea and I guess I will deal with that when it comes to it.

@RainSim absolutely up to you not to believe me but that was the case. Nothing I can do to prove that but totally fine if you don't want to believe me. Maybe the lowering of the gaze is the done thing but in this case it wasn't.

@BunsOfAnarchy I'm not trying to mask over anything! I literally described exactly what was happening at the time and that it made me uncomfortable. I described the situation exactly as it was. I made no referral to terrorism and would have been uncomfortable had they been saying any other religious phrase. It's bizarre and I didn't understand why he was looking at me as he said it. If I thought I was genuinely sat opposite a terrorist don't you think I would've got off the train?

@chickedychicked that's interesting. I'll keep that in mind, though can't imagine I'll come across this same situation again anytime soon!

*Are you an atheist or are you an agnostic? If you keep telling people you are atheist that's why they argue with you
*
From a poster who has made a big issue later of "live and let live" this is a profoundly ignorant & amazingly stupid thing to say.

For a start atheism and agnosticism are not mutually exclusive - they answer different questions. Atheism is about belief, agnosticism is about knowledge.

Every honest human being, theist or not, should be an agnostic because nobody KNOWS. And anyone who says they do is a liar.

So your "question", FASH84 is dumb anyway. But why would anyone argue with an atheist just because they're an atheist? Are you suggesting that's OK? Because that's extremely bigotted & prejudicial.

OP - are you saying that you KNOW no god of any kind exists? I doubt it, so you are an agnostic. An agnostic atheist = I don't know but I don't believe.

And that goes for all the smug "I'm an agnostic not an atheist" types. If you do not have a belief (which is an active thing) in any god then, sorry, you are an atheist. Maybe a weak one, but an atheist nonetheless.

(I do wish that people who use these kinds of labels about themselves troubled to find out what they actually mean. Dictionaries are useful for this, I find).

And OP.....what the fuck is a "militant atheist"? Do you mean someone willing to acknowledge their atheism and engage in conversations with theists? Atheists who want to fight for a society that is fair to everybody & doesn't privilege belief in anyway?

How dismissive and rude to use the word "militant". We don't use it about religious types who engage in exactly the same behaviour, do we? So fucking pack it in with the "militant" crap. You just give the idiotic "'ave a bit of respect" brigade like FASH84, who thinks all atheists should shut up to avoid offending the pwecious pwincess theists, extra ammunition.

When atheists start bearing arms or engaging in active confrontations, then you can use the word "militant". But you'll have a long wait.

@BananaToffo the way you are addressing me is pretty vile. No need to swear or tell me to 'fucking pack it in' - there are much more reasonable ways to put your point across.

By staying I am not a militant atheist, I mean I am simply saying that I do not enforce my views and non-belief on those who are religious and I do not try to belittle them or their views by trying to overpower them with mine, which I have found some atheists do. I am happy to use another term and listen to why the term is not appropriate if you are willing to explain without swearing at me.

Oops! Religions - not regions!

I think the term "militant atheists" is vile.

Militant movements shoot people, dear. Considerably more offensive than the word "fucking". Grow up.

Yes no harm done, just the same as those people in town centers who try to convert you to Christianity that people get so het up about. Let them get on with it as long as they don't intimidate. Hard to say if it was intimidating for the Op because we weren't there. Personally i like to pray silently, can't see the need to broadcast it for all and sundry, it should be a private thing, no need to let the world know.

@BananaToffo you are demonstrating someone who I would refer to as militantly trying to get your point across. You are quite aggressive, not listening to my explanation, overbearing and rude. Sorry if this is not what you believe the term to mean and I will certainly look in to the definition to ensure I use it correctly in the future. We all get things wrong sometimes - happy to accept I have been using this term incorrectly.