Frequent business trips as a single mother - AIBU to consider this job?

[craxmum]

So I was offered this job. Relatively good pay (more than double compared to what I am on now, around 110K), generous annual leave, and only 4 days a week.
However, there is a requirement (disclosed only at the last interview) to travel internationally. Probably for 3-4 days a month, but with overnights. All travel to the EU or US, nothing exotic.
I have two children, 3 and 5, and unfortunately no friends or family in the UK, and my ex husband is also not involved.
AIBU to consider it at all? Or is it manageable - night nannies, I don't know... Or travelling with the children and a nanny?
All opinions welcome.

Would an au pair or nanny that travels with you be an option?

I know single mothers who do this. They have a live in nanny who knows it’s part of their job to be alone overnight (for extra pay) for a few days per month. Grannies sometimes fly in from abroad to help out.

Don’t think about taking DC with you - it just doesn’t work for them.

Vg live in nanny.

Is it 3 or 4 nights at a time or 1 night a week?

Congratulations!! That sounds fantastic. I'm sure you could make that work, OP. Maybe a nanny who could stay over? If you advertise for one who could be flexible and explain the situation. If you want it you should take it. Especially if you can spend Fridays and weekends with the kids!!

You really need to investigate whether or not there are childcare options that will work for you - I am guessing you would need a nanny willing to overnight. You also need to discuss the realities with your prospective employer - what happens if a child is sick? Do you have to travel? How flexible is the Travel?

The pay rise may be negated when you look at the cost of overnight childcare.

Single parenting is relentless and unforgiving. Your children are young. Working out the balance between family life and long term financial prospects is difficult. Personally, I would go for a higher salary if I could be sure of childcare arrange,ents and be better off but that’s a long term option. You may wish to be more available to your children.

110k pro rata or 110 for 4 days??

It depends on your dc to a large extent. Would they cope? On paper it sounds manageable and exciting. My dc would have been distressed and made it impossible.

I wouldn't take DC with you. I'd look into getting a really good nanny who is prepared to cover the nights. I wouldn't want to leave young DC with someone who they're not very familiar and comfortable with. If you have a great long term nanny who the kids love I think it's manageable.

I do this with a very long suffering husband at home, with parents relatively near to bail out on the odd occasions his work "gets in the way". It's bloody hard work trying to make arrangements for school pick-ups and drops-offs etc etc.

That said, would your salary be enough to get you a good nanny who can do overnights? I really really wouldn't recommend travelling with the children. You will be neither fully focused on the children or the job and will therefore do both badly. Also, it will screw up the kids' body clock for longer than yours tooing and froing to the States.

What would your 4 days be like (very long/manageable etc)? Is that 3/4 days gone or 3/4 days there? 4 days in the US could easily mean gone a week? Do you have room for a live in nanny?

Thank you all. My children are relatively independent, they've been in daycare / with nannies since young age.
The travel can be for 3-4 days in a row or for one day a week, it is not predictable. It is to meet with someone much senior, so depends on their diary really, and will definitely be on a short notice.

It is 110K for four days, not pro-rated.

Do you have a nanny already?

I think a massive chunk of the extra money will be eaten up paying for such enormous flexibility and hours childcare. Are there much better prospects with the new job? Getting an appropriate nanny might be hard, when would you need to start?

So around £5700/5800 a month. If it's more than double your current - I'm assuming 50k (around 3000 a month). The extra would pay for a nanny, but would it be worth it?

No, at the moment I don't have a nanny (it is not affordable on my current salary), using a holiday club.

I'd get a nanny or au pair. I used to have to travel quite a lot for work and an au pair worked well for us (I was a lone parent).

Do you have room for a live in nanny?

I’m a single parent and I wouldn’t, sorry. I’ve just been away for 4 days with work and it was a right pita to organise childcare, and the DC were quite unsettled with the change of routine.

@Sleepyslops
Yes, I am currently on just over £50K. Bus, as you could imagine, best part of £3K is already spent on childcare, so the expense on nanny would be marginal. I did a quick search, I think I could find someone for around 3K gross a month live-in?

It looks like my job, but I'm not a single parent. In 70% of the cases everything runs smoothly and according to plan. It's the other 30% that are the problem. Meetings rescheduled at very short notice, flights delayed for hours, missed connections, this winter I was stranded for 3 extra days due to snow. I'd say you can only do it with reliable and flexible live in help.

You really can't use an au pair to take care of young dc for 3/4 full days at a time. You need a nanny. Depending on how long the 4 days are you might find someone to work a standard week then pay an hourly extra rate for over nights. The short notice will be tricky too.

I think if you can find childcare that works (which sounds manageable!), go for it. It's not an excessive amount of time, and I'm sure the extra money would be very helpful, as I imagine doing it all solo is tricky to say the least. Good luck!

I would be shocked if it was that much, to be honest. Have you thought about an au pair?

It would be fab if you can work it out. The children won't always be so young and you never know, you might end up delegating some of the trips. The money is fantastic and working only 4 days would be great.