to be annoyed by people who let their kids run round supermarkets 'playing'

[ProperLavs]

Actually screaming and running into people.
I had an interesting 'conversation' with a woman when i muttered for someone to stop them screaming and running around. This woman, who didn't actually have anything to do with the kids, who were roughly 4 and 2, told me they were only playing.

I told her it was a very busy supermarket and they shouldn't be playing here
She then muttered about some people having to take their children shopping. I told her I had had to take all of mine (6 under 8) and no they were't ever allowed to run round screaming whilst I ignored them.
Wtf is wrong with people?

Basically it's the view of 'i get stressed and sometimes struggle to manage my kids and because of that you have to put up with them running you over and being a massive fucking nuisance in the supermarket'

Hey Lola yo've got a friend!

hmm lola has disappeared and Amy has appeared.........

Amy is Lola I reckon

Hi ladies 👋

I've been asked if I agree with everything Lola said, and I confess I've not read everything as I've been having a Saturday. However, I've not just "appeared" as someone else said - I posted a little earlier as I simply put in my two pence. Basically this:

If a child endangered me in the supermarket, I'd speak directly to the child. If a child was playing about in the supermarket but not endangering me, I'd get on with my life. In either case, I wouldn't demonise the parent involved because I don't know a thing about her. She might be a lazy div, but I'm not her judge. She might also have just received the worst news in the world.

Attempts to control your children should always be made, but sometimes your kid will defy you. That's kids.

The little failure of controlling your kid when you HAVE tried, is accidental and at times unavoidable. Being sanctimonious and judgemental is a choice. And actually, it's a choice that's going to make YOUR day worse as you embark on a bad mood.

No, I do not agree with Lola's choice of the word "brain-damaged" - bad choice. But I can see why you've all pounced on it, because - let's be honest - do you really deny this part of her post:

"it's NORMAL for your child to misbehave occasionally and it's not always possible to CONTROL children as people put it."

If yes, then wow, I surrender. Please teach me how to be as perfect as you.

Amy my children might miss behave at home. They don’t misbehave in public.

@ProperLavs

Good work. Genuinely, well done - I'm happy for you.

But say if you children DID misbehave in public, even for one day - would it be because you are crap and deserve derision?

This thread gets worse and worse. I agree Amy and of course you’re ganging up on Lola!!
In reference to the pp who said about the luggage carousel. I was once in a restaurant where a couple were clearly struggling with the behaviour of one of their children. They took the food as take away in the end. They were doing their best. The restaurant clapped when they went. Recalling that still upsets me. It was so horrible and uncalled for. The parents were trying. Whilst I understand what you are all saying about the need for control I also think sometimes people jump on situations and judge. As in the restaurant example. I expect the children and parents were mortified by the public humiliation in the luggage example. Yes, try and assist but blimey be kinder!

Why not try actually reading the thread?

Not one person has said they judge someone trying to parent a child having a tantrum or being a bit naughty. That's a normal part of parenting and we acknowledge that it isn't always easy. What they have said is that they judge those who allow their kids to run wild in places where it is inappropriate or dangerous for them to do so. They'd judge someone who makes no attempt to curtail their kids' behaviour.

Lola stated very early on that we should all get over ourselves and her child could do as they liked.

Many of us have also said that we have had a very difficult time with our kids as they have additional needs. I've read nothing but empathy for those parents.

I’ve read as much as I could! It’s got too long. But As shown by properlavs comment :’my children don’t misbehave in public’ this thrrad is clearly not so simple as you suggest in everyone understanding etc. Such comments don’t show understanding of those odd incidents when children just behave as normal children. Nor did the thing I witnessed in the restaurant. Yes, you are right children should be taught to behave well. It doesn’t always happen. Whilst some
Of the responses on this thread show empathy for this others really don’t I’m afraid.

SO this @Nsbgsyebebdnd

I've never ever said that parents shouldn't attempt to control the behaviour of their children. What's remarkable is that mums here are claiming their child NEVER runs a foot from their side and, that if they did, they'd fully expect a deserved bollocking from a stranger.

🤣😂😆😂🤣

Quite Amy! With public humiliation thrown in. Lovely!

@Nsbgsyebebdnd and @AmyRhodes I honestly don't know what thread you pair are reading but your comments certainly don't appertain to what people on this one are saying. You are entitled to your own perception, of course but you're both way off the mark here

I don’t know, I think this thread reads like one of the many judgy threads on here about children’s behaviour at the moment. Almost no helpful posts on here actually suggesting how parents stop their child running off or magically stop them misbehaving (with a couple of notable exceptions where posters recommended practice shopping trips).

Well you can start by leaving bikes scooters skates heeleys at home and buying a pair of reins surely?

That at the very least prevents accidents involving those

Scooters already left outside. Would never take bikes and scooters into a shop. No problem with Heeleys long as kids are sensible in them. My DC would remove reins in a second.

Well that's half the battle then surely? Even running off you can catch up if the werent on wheels

And these things didn't happen half as much when we are kids. If our parents survived with far less technology and adaptations put in place then the only thing left tats changed to make it apparently so much harder to control and parent kids is US.

The more shit available to make life easier he more people opt out of parenting altogether and abuse it

Giles, I couldn't agree more.

All kids are naughty from time to time

That isn't what this is about

Its about parents who make zero effort. If your child brings a scooter to the supermarket they leave it outside. Because supermarkets are not the place for them. For their own safety as well as every one else's. If you haven't got the authority to tell your child that, there is a problem generally.

My son is now at uni. When i go out to lunch at weekends, I won't be seated near tables with children. I like swearing. I don't want to have to watch what I say because there is a 6 year old at my elbow. So I moderate my behaviour out of courtesy and i sit elsewhere for that reason. Parents should do the same for others! It's not a hard concept to grasp.

Last week it was someone whingeing about kids in trollies. This week it's kids running around. So to be clear, children should follow their parents silently, Von Trapp style, round the supermarket in the hope they don't ruin a child-free person's day that day by existing?

Although heelies are fucking annoying in any space

I'd say all kids misbehave in public sometimes. Absolutely.
The difference being that decent parents try to teach their children manners, courtesy, thought for others etc.
There does honestly seem to be a growing number of parents - so I can only assume younger than my generation - that seems to for whatever reason, be discouraged from actually parenting their children properly and saying 'no!' once in a while!!!!
If you let a child run amok in a supermarket, restaurant or whatever then it most definitely is lazy parenting! A child having a whinge or a strop is not.
BIG DIFFERENCE!!!!

Well precisely rainbow

We've all shopped with toddlers screaming in buggies or trolleys or given up and gone hope with a squirming toddler under one arm. If I ever walk past some poor sod who's kid is having an absolute meltdown or being wrestled into a buggy or trolly I have nothing but sympathy and a sense of relief that at that moment in time it's not my child.

We have all been there. We let them go first in the queue and/or engage the older sibling in conversation in the till queue in the hope we can pass on some sense of understanding and kindness.

That is not remotely in the same league as people who allow their kids to run /scooter/skate around and put themselves or other people in danger. And think they somehow are the victims because someone stepped up and told them to bloody well pack it in.

Kids "playing" in supermarkets really annoys me, same as weeing kids running around in restaurants, cinemas and every other place they shouldn't be running around.
Not every place is a playground for the sole pleasure of entertaining children
Some parents need to learn how to parent and teach kids to behave