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Original poster

Refused Divorce WTF

224 replies

DroningOn · 25/07/2018 10:52

Tini Owens loses Supreme Court divorce fight - www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-hereford-worcester-44949856

Don't understand how a husband could hold his wife to an unhappy marriage when she wants a divorce so much she's willing to go all the way to the Supreme Court.

Is it a divorce settlement issue or something?

OP posts:
NotARealDuchess · 25/07/2018 10:55

I just read this too, was wondering if it’s because if one party refuses the divorce they must remain separated for something like 2 or 5 years? I’m sure someone with more knowledge will be along shortly.

NewYearNewMe18 · 25/07/2018 10:56

It says in the article why. Because the law states 5 years if both parties do not agree. He refutes her claims of his unreasonable behaviour.

ProfessorMoody · 25/07/2018 11:14

There must be more to it.

I had to appeal my divorce as my ExH wouldn't sign the papers because he didn't agree with my accusations of adultery and unreasonable behaviour.

I was able to prove it, plus prove he'd received the papers and just wasn't signing, so they agreed to proceed without his knowledge. That was nearly ten years ago and I'm wondering if he even knows he's divorced.

There were no assets though, so no claim for anything on my part.

ProfessorMoody · 25/07/2018 11:14

Oh, and we'd only been apart a year and a half.

whatwouldyoubelikeat28 · 25/07/2018 11:17

Poor thing. 'Desperately unhappy marriage'. I'm sure refusing the divorce is going to fix that.

GahWhatever · 25/07/2018 11:22

It's different for adultery. If your husband didn't contest the adultery then it stands as grounds for divorce.

In this case she claims unreasonable behaviour which he contests. He claims that it isn't that he's unreasonable, but that she is bored or must have had an affair. Ironically if she had an affair and used it for grounds for divorce it would have gone through years ago as he couldn't have contested it.

PyongyangKipperbang · 25/07/2018 11:26

What a selfish controlling cunt, no wonder she wants to divorce him.

Personally I think that divorce on the grounds of "Because I want one" is way overdue, but inevitably there will be cries of it undermining marriage, wont somebody think of the children etc, mainly from men who resent having to share assets with a STBEW.

TheShapeOfEwe · 25/07/2018 11:28

Seems mad that 'I don't want to be married to X any more' isn't an acceptable ground for divorce. Time for a no-fault system for sure.

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 25/07/2018 11:29

The irony. The massively controlling behaviour of denying a divorce to someone who clearly does not want to be married to you, whilst denying your unreasonable behaviour towards them. This is just a small insight to what this poor woman’s life has probably been like for years.

potsetyoghurt · 25/07/2018 11:29

The stupid thing is that the way the law stands, the judges' hands are tied. I agree though that he doesn't come out of this well. Why on earth would you want to stay married to someone who doesn't want to be married to you? Oh, unless you were really controlling that is Hmm

potsetyoghurt · 25/07/2018 11:30

Crossed with judas who said it way better than I did!

Honflyr · 25/07/2018 11:32

I think if one person doesn't want to be married to the other person anymore, yet the other person in the marriage wishes to remain married... The divorce should still happen. I don't get why you have to be separated for like 5 years before you can get divorced just because of someone clinging on to the dregs or being a controlling ass.

Quartz2208 · 25/07/2018 11:32

It has to be Parliament though that creates the law - the judges cannot go against statute law and the reasons she gave were "flimsy and exagerrated"

The courts have no choice but to bat it back to Parliament

ACatsNoHelpWithThat · 25/07/2018 11:33

She wouldn't have been able to cite her own adultery for grounds to divorce (if that were true which I'm in no way suggesting it is).

Honflyr · 25/07/2018 11:34

Think I'd just lie and say i'd had an affair even if I hadn't, just to be rid

MrStarkIDontFeelSoGood · 25/07/2018 11:34

She didn't adequately evidence proof of unreasonable behaviour and he wasn't willing to agree

Honflyr · 25/07/2018 11:36

It shouldn't matter if the reason you want a divorce is flimsy. Wanting a divorce for any reason is enough

LimboLuna · 25/07/2018 11:36

Poor woman, I just read the judgement of it and thought what the actual fuck. But the judges can only go by how the law stands.

I do have to ask what kind of a person is that adamant at staying married to someone who clearly doesn’t want to be married to you. However ‘successful’ you felt the marriage was

MingeUterusMingeMingeYoni · 25/07/2018 11:41

Legally it's a really interesting case. I remember when the C of A judgement came out, I think it was, loads of people were saying this is because she's a woman and it wouldn't have been news if she was in her position as a bloke. They were, shockingly enough, wrong.

She petitioned for divorce originally on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour but basically said very little about what that was. And that had been the trend in family law for about a decade before that. The idea was you try and keep everything as civilised as possible and try to keep slagging off the other partner to a minimum. I even got told as a trainee that courts would get pissed off with spelling out unreasonable behaviour except in really extreme cases and it was seen as bad form. Flimsy is what she was probably advised to do. He then contested this nicey nicey petition and won, and I think the decision is because there wasn't actually much in there to go on.

But would this prevent her from petitioning again before 2020 with more detail of the unreasonable behaviour in the grounds though? I haven't done family law for a good long while now and am out of date.

I'm also strongly side eyeing him too. Wanting to force someone to stay married to you when they clearly don't want to is totes reasonable behaviour.

MingeUterusMingeMingeYoni · 25/07/2018 11:43

I also agree divorce reform is way overdue. Even if we don't introduce no fault, the separation with consent period needs reducing from 2 years to 1 and in particular the separation without consent should be reduced from 5 years, maybe to 3. That would be better than what we have now.

LighthouseSouth · 25/07/2018 11:44

oh it's mad
I know a few situations where the man has refused for 5 years.

it's the definition of unreasonable behaviour - but then again I don't agree with a lot of the crap round marriage and divorce anyway.

Iamtryingtobenicehere · 25/07/2018 11:44

I saw this pop up on my news feed and I fuming for her too. Adults don’t have to ask another persons permission to get married, they just do it, the judge that’s holding this poor lady to ransom needs a good hiding, it’s not up to to decide, if she wants a divorce, he should just damn well grant her it!

ConciseandNice · 25/07/2018 11:46

My utter narcissistic nut of an ex (violent, pathological liar to boot) claimed on countless occasions that he couldn’t sign anything because he didn’t even know who I was or that he wasn’t who they said he was. In the end the bailiffs served him papers at his office, having confirmed his identity with his boss. Hysterically he freaked out and ran away from them, leaping over desks until he fell over a chair onto his face. The court thought he was the stupidest CF they’d had in a long time.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 25/07/2018 11:46

Listening to the radio reports now... weird! If someone wants out and says so, loudly, in a court room, what more proof does anyone need that the marriage has broken down!

But it does show that the 'no fault' divorce we all think exists is a figment of our imaginations!

The Guardian report from earlier is a gloomy read

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/mar/24/tini-owens-trapped-loveless-marriage-judges-refuse-divorce

RB68 · 25/07/2018 11:46

I wonder if she could sue on unreasonable behaviour of refusing the divorce just because he can - I mean that is controlling in itself isn't it

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