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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be irritated by this childcare comment?

91 replies

QueenofmyPrinces · 20/07/2018 08:09

I have a friend who reduced her hours at work and became part of some mainly online Weight Loss company. She now works for them and earns money by selling their products and by recruiting new woman to do the same role she does. All her work is done via FB and emails and she puts many photos on her FB page of the products she sells, the meals she cooks and ‘before and after’ photos of women who have found success through her diet powders and pills. She also puts up lots of inspirational quotes to try and paint a picture of how people’s lives could be if they joined her team.

Anyway - on to my point.

Numerous times a week she will list on her FB Page all the reasons why working from home and from her phone (as in FB and emails) is the way to go and she will make comments about how she gets to “be there” for her son when it really matters, (in relation to him being 18 months old) and how he gets to have his mummy around all the time like he should have. It always has an undertone of if mother is at home with her child it must mean she cares more for her child than a mother who goes out to work.

Today she has posted another list of why women should follow her footsteps and she has written “No packing my son off to a childminder” and it’s really pissed me off.

Maybe I’m being too sensitive because I do use a childminder but the term “packing him off” implies it’s something bad for the child and mothers are bad for doing it.

It really riled me up and I can’t help but think using statements like that is just going to piss other working women off too as opposed to luring them in and increasing her recruitment numbers which in turn leads to a pay rise.

When I read it it simply made me think that I wouldn’t want to work for such a judgemental company or woman.

Maybe she doesn’t realise how her statement could be interpreted but it’s just really annoyed me.

OP posts:
imavinit · 20/07/2018 09:12

Give it six months, I would just take it with a pinch of salt, I had a friend who did this and started to stick pictures of Ferraris and swimming pools on her toilet wall to give herself and husband encouragement!!, She was really really boring for quite a while but in the end the spell was broken and she came back to earth with a very quiet bump,

QueenofmyPrinces · 20/07/2018 09:12

Anyone who ‘likes’ her FB status or photo she’s straight on them and comments “Would you like more info Hun?” or “I’ll message you Hun.”

We have a mutual friend (who also uses childcare) and I know they’ve had a mini bust-up in the past about this business (mutual friend being critical of it) so it’s never talked anout anymore.

OP posts:
JellyBears · 20/07/2018 09:15

There’s nothing worse then a Mum who judges other for having to work etc. Ignore her.

LML83 · 20/07/2018 09:24

It is rude and annoying. .

Read ellebeau it's a blog from the perspective of one of these people, i now have a bit of sympathy for them as they are aspiring for something that only the very few achieve.

KwatahPanda · 20/07/2018 09:27

It always has an undertone of if mother is at home with her child it must mean she cares more for her child than a mother who goes out to work.

These aren;t her words, it's what they tell her to say to guilt other stupid people in to following their steps. She's spending more money than she is making without a doubt, no wonder she can't afford childcare. She's certainly not helping her son spending family money on a non business.

QueenAravisOfArchenland · 20/07/2018 09:28

She doesn't really think this stuff though. She's just regurgitating what people "upline" of her in the whole ghastly structure have told her to say. She thinks she is working, after all. There's literally no benefit of engaging her on the topic, she has the MLM in her other ear telling her you're just a jealous hater.

dailygrowl · 20/07/2018 09:30

MLM= multi level marketing. It's like a pyramid scheme.

Armchairanarchist · 20/07/2018 09:32

The cult of MLMs. I don't know anyone that's ever kept it up for long. Friends and family quickly get bored of whatever the latest crap they're flogging. I just unfollow them immediately.

mindlessobsessions · 20/07/2018 09:46

she's a good friend, and she's alienating people that would buy from her too. It's a silly comment - but if good friends make silly comments I do them the respect of telling them that they offended me. If it's someone I don't care about, I don't.

QueenofmyPrinces · 20/07/2018 09:48

I had never thought of it like this. I just thought she was earning lots of money whilst simultaneously offending women Hmm

In one breath beneath her before and after photos she’s not saying “it’s not about numbers, it’s about being happy with who you are” and then in the next breath she’s going on and on about how many lbs/stones the women on her plan have lost.

OP posts:
PitterPatterOfBigFeet · 20/07/2018 09:48

I would ignore her, everybody who gets involved in these pyramid schemes (mainly aimed at women with young children) is the same. Posting about how much time they get with their kids and "inspirational" stories about how this time next year they'll be living in a mansion with their own yacht after selling enough face cream or whatever.

QueenofmyPrinces · 20/07/2018 09:49

Type: she is saying it’s not about numbers....

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 20/07/2018 09:50

Ask her for more information. What's the sick pay and pension like? If she has another little prince or princess how much paid maternity leave will she get?

glintandglide · 20/07/2018 09:54

When I was on maternity leave i was approached a lot by these people. They asked what I did and when I told them (I’m a professional that most would consider highly paid/ prestigious) they’d scurry away. They’re after a certain type of woman- one who thinks the prospect of a few hundred quid a month is brilliant (not that they’re likely to earn even that)

12FreeRangeEggs · 20/07/2018 09:54

Ah the cult of MLM. I have a “friend” who calls herself a “mumpreneur”, mum + entrepreneur = mumpreneur! Genius!! She tries to sell Forever Living aloe shite. I still follow her because her posts are comic gold.

FlapAttack23 · 20/07/2018 09:56

Just say. "But if we all became mlm geniuses like you .. then who would buy all the crap?"

hibeat · 20/07/2018 09:58

"Girl, you can't "pack of your child" because you can't afford to. Just Saying"
I would "Next" the girl like a certain real housewife. She is rude. Is she selling anything ? Like actually ?

Jebbs · 20/07/2018 10:01

Agree with all the other ladies suggesting the Elle Beau blog. Came across it a while ago and can't recomment enough.

glintandglide · 20/07/2018 10:01

"Girl, you can't "pack of your child" because you can't afford to. Just Saying"

Wahhhh brilliant Grin

BadgersBum · 20/07/2018 10:07

I would bet a gold coin against a pinch of shit that she will be very quick to 'pack her child off' as soon as those free childcare hours kick in! I have a few friends on FB selling make up, apparently selling it and applying it in front of an audience every day could change my life.

LOliver123 · 20/07/2018 10:08

She is probably never of her phone and probably spends very little quality time with her child. I work from home , but I put my child in childcare as I would be neglecting him whilst trying to work at the same time!

mindutopia · 20/07/2018 10:11

Honestly, I can’t imagine a worse situation for a child than being at home with little interaction with other children and a mum glued to her phone all day!

I largely work from home (though none of this MLM bs, I have a PhD and a real job) and mine have always gone to nursery on my work days. I don’t want them to grow up learning it’s fine to ignore someone for a screen, but if I need to work, I need to use my computer and while I do, they can go have fun somewhere else with someone who can devote their full time and attention to them.

The MLM thing is all just posturing and smoke and mirrors. I don’t have a single friend who does it who has time for family and isn’t just slaving away working another full time job on top and miserable, despite all the crap on social media.

slovenlys · 20/07/2018 10:18

Post something like this on her wall, along with a caption

'Careful hun. It's so easy to spend too much time on that overflowing inbox'

To be irritated by this childcare comment?
Boulty · 20/07/2018 10:23

We all have different opinions of childcare. Most of us work and dependent on the standard of childcare and the hours said child is in someone else's care makes a huge difference. Some children do 'appear' to be packed off to childcare... eg dropped off in pj's barely awake at 6 am and picked up 6 pm 5 days a week. Others flex time if they can or shift work or work around partners to cover time with their children and also use childcare. Each to their own and she is entitled to her opinions.

That said she is promoting working from home and the more parents she recruits to join her way of working the more she earns - so she is hardly going to promote 'going out to work' and leaving children with minders etc..

sprinklesandsauce · 20/07/2018 10:24

As numerous people have said, it's because of the MLM. They are brainwashed to post this stuff so that you read it and immediately sign up so you too can have this wonderful life that they have. I had one who messaged me after I posted about saving for a holiday. Funnily enough her business only lasted a few months.... (FL).

Don't take it to heart, just hide her posts and thank your lucky stars that you have a decent job and are not gullible enough to be sucked into a MLM like your friend.

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