People telling you what their dogs are ‘saying’

[chestylarue52]

Lighthearted thread but still, I think I have unreasonable levels of anger about this

Most recent example being by a lake relaxing with friends when couple with three dogs come along, we are chatting to the woman of the couple while the dogs are jumping in the lake, playing with their toys etc.

Man of the couple is providing loud commentary of what the dogs are doing by means of

“Oooo he says! He says, Mum it’s cold in here!! Ooo I’m getting out now, he says, where’s that ball, he says!”

“I didn’t expect it to be that cold he says!!”

I know IABU but I wanted to drown him

😂 Buswankeress horse eating tree 😂

Our own shadow at certain times of day is the worst thing, horse will (silently) shout FUCK! RUN! and I’ll be ‘darling, sweetie, it’s just our shadow, it never usually hurts us - let’s turn, let’s slow down’

Horse: gallop gallop gallop OH FUCK IT IS AS FAST AS US

Me: ‘darling shall we walk instead, the ground is really unsuitable for such hard fast work’

Horse:

Me: ‘okay darling I’m going to perform an emergency stop with one rein now’

Horse stops abruptly, quivering all over, shadow out of view: ‘it’s okay Why, we got away from it, don’t worry’

Where are you manners OP. It would be quite rude of poppa to ignore his dogs when they’re speaking to him 🤣🤣🤣

I woke up once to find two of my cats staring at me very very intently and I just knew they were silently deciding which part of me which of them would start eating first if I didn’t wake up 💀

Getting a puppy soon and I can't wait for this.

DP was recently working on site fitting a new window and says he heard a woman having a very loud and slightly annoying conversation with what he presumed was her friend: "Where shall we go for lunch today then? I like that XX place? What do you think? You had the beef last time do you remember? And we met that couple with the caravan?" On and on for ages.

He finally finished the job and went to put his tools in the car only to see the woman who'd been talking - and her very disinterested looking dog sitting on a bench.

Will this happen to us when we get our pupper?

Those of you who talk to your dogs start talking for them! It's hilarious it's endless fun!

@PuppyMonkey Almost definitely.

Not sure who posted. About dog owner not parents, my mum is my dogs nana and just like we say to dss our friends are auntie/uncle out of politeness...

Reading through all these posts I'm glad in not the only one, next time someone says I'm crazy I'm sending them a link to this thread!! With a middle finger emoji! Haha

I don't talk for my cats but I have conversations with the more vocal of the two (the other one never says anything really). It's usually either about food or going out.

Usually goes something like this:

Meow
It's raining you wouldn't like it out there.
Mrow-ow
Not my fault it's raining.
Mrow
Fine here you go.
(Opens door)
Mrr-ow
(Cat sits grumpily in the door way)
Well I told you
(Cat pointedly turns head away and ignores me)
I'm not leaving the door open.
(Cat doesn't move)
Come in or go out please.
(Cat doesn't move. If possible she ignores me even more)
I sigh and leave the door open.

And I'm neither the cats owner or their parent. It's more like lodgers. They kindly allow us to live in their house as long as we provide food. If they weren't happy they would go find another house to live in that had some conveniently already present human lodgers.

@WhyDidIEatThat

Apparently if a person died and had cats the cats would eat their owner to survive, and apparently a dog would not they would lay next to you and die next to you....not sure where I heard that so just maybe the cats where deciding yes you can have the right arm and I'll take the left

WhyDidIEatThat but its hearsay. Just be careful is all I'm saying haha

I’m more a sort of guardian of my animals, it’s a lot of responsibility but also much fun. (Except I would secretly like to marry my horse because I love him SO INTENSELY but it would be a union of passionate celibacy and one where we can do sexuals with others of our own species obvs)

@mirime you need a sign "the cats and their housekeeping staff live here"

Gah, I have 4 Greyhounds and certainly veer into the crazy dog lady territory but I would loathe that sort of behaviour. It's fecking cringetastic! If my DH did that, I would drown the fecker myself!

😂 crazydoglady I knew it!

I wouldn’t put it past my dog but I’d have to be at very advanced stage of decomposition to appeal to him, disgusting creature!

It would be a union of passionate celibacy and one where we can do sexuals with others of our own species obvs,

Oh my god howling!

The more stinky my dogs food is the more they enjoy it,

" yum yum this meat is lovely mam thanks"
"Oh my gawwd these sardines are delicous"

"Liver oh god I've died and gone to heaven mum you are my hero" (me gags in the corner!

I talk for my cats - my girl one is an evil genius with a very haughty disdainful voice and my boy is not the brightest, a bit nervy and always worried about something. I am aware that I’m completely bonkers but as I am their slave owner, I feel I have no choice. Only in the house though, and not when we have guests

I've not RTFT, just the first two pages.
I LOVE animals, I'd live on a farm, or a zoo, or a rescue... maybe not a rescue as I'd just keep them all! But you get the idea. I've never 'talked' for my pets... I've explained their actions if someone asked, seemed interested or were being directly affected. I've baby talked to them (far too much), and I also sort of role play with their toys like you would with a child but much more graphic "little bunny is bouncing through the grass, oh no! You bit bunny's head" add in some weird dying noises, bunny plotting revenge etc but only do that at home, where no one can see me...
Dog voices etc, no! My DP has with some of our smaller pets, but usually for comic effect and I tell him they are animals not toys (after a giggle)

TemptressofWaikiki

You are truly not living and no where near a crazy... yet ...I probably talk to and for my dogs mire than I converse with people

I have a plaque wurh photos of my dogs saying.

We live here you don't,
If you don't want dog hair on your clothes don't sit on the furniture,
If we dont like you our humans probably wont either,
If We make you uncomfortable our human will gladly put you in another room,
To you we may 'just dogs but to our humans we are four legged furry children.

Yes I am that nuts

"but I'm just checking my pee-mails"

Crazydog - do you also have this?!

Haha Didieatthat....now you’re going to have to sleep with one eye open! They were obviously choosing their favourite “cuts” ............

You are truly not living and no where near a crazy... yet ...I probably talk to and for my dogs mire than I converse with people

Hahahaha Yeah, I did say I am 'veering towards' I talk to them all but I would not talk for them.

Christ. You’re all awful.

My dog and I have conversations. Sometimes I forget myself when we're out and she'll answer me. Thank god, up till now no one's been near enough to hear me doing her 'voice'.

It's definitely a pet owner thing, I suspect a lot of people do it. But this man sounds like a whole other level of nuts if he's interpreting what the dog is 'saying' to it's 'mum' in front of strangers.

That would have freaked me out tbh and irritated the hell out of me.